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- Absent grandfather.
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My husband of 32 years left me 7 years ago. It was so unexpected that I am still sad about it after all this time. Since he left there are now 2 grandchildren which he is not in touch with. I can't stop feeling such strong feelings of sadness when I see other grandparents with their grandchildren. He would have been a wonderful grandfather as he was a wonderful father.
Thankyou for posting redrebecca, welcome here.
It isnt uncommon, especially in today's split modern day family situations. My adult children wont see their grandmother , I wont see her, each child sees one parent and not the other. My adult neices havent seen their father for 15 years.
We all have choices in this life. Your ex husband has exercised his right to choose if he wants to see his grandchildren or not. Yes it is sad. Perhaps, if you know where he lives, your children can write him a nice letter expressing just that, that he was a wonderful father.
Apart from that, some basic contact from your children I suggest you dont dwell on this. These sorts of sad things in life will eat you up. I know, I spent many years being absorbed by this type of thing. Children will "adopt" other older people to fill in the gaps....like my neices...they see me as a father figure.
I wondered if I could explore the idea of still feeling sadness 7 years after your husband left? Did you get any form of counselling when this happened? I can understand it came as a shock. In fact you can never tell how you will react in these types of situations.
dear RedRebecca, we want to thank you for setting up this post, and indeed it is very sad, but both replies back to you are very good and if you could break them down and then reply to us.
I know how this feeling is as it has happened with me as I used to get on very well with my ex's family, nieces, nephews and even the in-laws, but now since the divorce I have no contact with any of them, and now her partner has just slipped in, taking my place, however according to my sons they don't particularly like him.
The concern here is that your husband could see his grand kids, so I wonder why he hasn't even tried. L Geoff. x