This bipolar life
Are your moods are like an elevator with no control buttons? Mine are.
Ground floor ... I feel normal, content, just quietly getting on with ordinary, everyday life, loving my family and friends. This is as it should be. And maybe there's nothing wrong with me after all. Live.
Going up, top floor. Oh look! There's a shiny thing! I want to sing! Let's go buy stuff! Let's have a big party and invite the world! What could possibly go wrong! Woooooo hoooooooo! Play.
Going up (a different day) top floor. What do you mean you don't agree with me! I'm right! Why don't you think like me? Keep up! How can you be so illogical? I'll f-ing shred you if you don't do what I want! Rage.
Going down, lower ground floor. Flat, listless, can't be bothered. Can still function but it's a drag. Cope
Going down, basement. I'm never getting out of bed again. I'm useless, worthless. Total idiot, how could I ever imagine I could do anything, nothing ever goes right because I'm wrong. I'm a burden to everyone. Hide.
Welcome to my bipolar world. It's always been my world, but it's only recently I've seen it for what it is. About 15 years ago I was diagnosed with clinical depression during one of my 'basement' times. I had a lot of lower ground floor times too, on and off, and I kept out of the basement (so I thought) with alcohol. Until that took me into the blackest ever basement with only one obvious way out. Having survived doing something very dangerous I realised I had to stop drinking or I really would die.
I never took much notice of the playful times or the anger, that was just me, I was fun sometimes, and sometimes I was a devastating bitch. Ha! Deal with it people!
Well, yes, but in time the elevator started going up and down too quickly and, as I became more aware and more knowledgeable about mental health I realised this wasn't good. Doctor. Diagnosis. Bipolar 2. Lithium.
So, I've started this thread in the hope that other bipolar folks will join me, to share experiences and strategies. In my 'beginners' understanding, we are different from other fellow travellers of the back dog. While we experience depression as many others on this site do, the hypomanic or manic ups and, for some the rapid cycling that can happen, are experiences unto themselves.
I want to learn more, and I want to share with others. I hope my fellow elevators will join me here.
BTW, it's a ground floor day in my head today! Yay!
Quirky I think one of the most important things we can do is read to a child.
Velvet don't over do it...you are on the go all day. If you get to the gym 3 days then that's great.
Aries enjoy your getaway.
Am going out for dinner tonight with both my daughters. We are going to a seafood Greek place. Am wearing a new outfit. It's my birthday. Hope everyone's Ok.
Happy Birthday Lisa. Is it a big birthday or an in between one. Are yiu having cake if so what type..
my daughter reads and talked everyday to her baby , I delivered a few hundred books my daughter asked for her baby. A great collection of our favourite authors and new ones.
Aries have a nice time away.
Asdff I know what you mean about crying babies.
Velvet I want to buy one of those fit bit things to count my steps but never do as it seems complicated.
I was spectacularly lazy yesterday. 6k steps. Lazy today. Not really. Comparitively.
Ohhhhhh a getaway Airies. Nice.
Dinner is nice too Lisa. I'm cooking some top notch steak tonight. Man thing is banned from cooking steak. Last scotch fillet he munted.
I believe interacting with babies helps them learn so much about the world around them. Emotions. Speech. Probably bucketloads!
welcome to the forum and thanks for making your first post here. When you feel you are the only one it be lonely. You are not alone and we are listening.
we are not medical people but we have lived experience. Have you ever spoken to your gp.
sometimes moods maybe caused my different things.
we are a friendly supportive group so ask questions chat and or read. You are welcome and we are listening.
Lisa, Happy Birthday , hope you have a good one.oh yum seafood Greek place I’m salivating.
Asdff , be kind to yourself. Medication takes time to adjust. I’m on lots . My issue is I have the odd one falling out or staying in the Webster pack. I’m now on Panadol osteo. Didn’t realise taking these can lead to issues. I’m a bit blasé in regards to meds. I’d like to be off them. Maybe one day.
Will try and enjoy time away.Not a fan of driving but we can share
As I learn about things I've been diagnosed with, I see things so much more clearly now. I wish the people in my life would educate themselves to understand too.
Why am I bad with praise? Rarely if ever have I received it. Positive feedback is super rare. I don't think that's unique at all.
I always have to push myself because I've been conditioned to think I'm not worth positive feedback, because it has rarely happened.
Need to do more and more to seek the reward. Never get the reward. Burn out. Rinse repeat.
It's depressing tbh.