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Sharing strategies to help with PTSD

PamelaR
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

One of my biggest learnings has been - PTSD is not like a broken arm. When you break your arm, it mends. PTSD is with you for life. It took me ages to recognise that I'd been triggered. Some of the simplest things - like going to the shopping centre at the beginning of winter and seeing the multi-colour shirts - red, blue, black squares. The hardest part for me is identifying the trigger because the pacing heart, the sweats, the panic, the fear doesn't happen immediately. It happens after I walk out of the shopping centre.For the first few years after being diagnosed with PTSD I was hell bent on identifying the trigger. Now - I don't worry. I simple accept I'm triggered - do my breathing, relaxation to beautiful music, write down my feelings and emotions, talk with my husband. Let him know I've been triggered. Most times my cats won't come near me while I'm working through a 'phase', but they certainly know when I've come out the other side. They come and give me lots of comfort and love. The down side of how I manage is to drink alcohol - to stop the feelings and emotions. It doesn't work, but it helps go to sleep. I'm not recommending drinking as a strategy!!

I have had 2 excellent psychologists that helped me. It's important to find someone other than those close to you to talk to. One was very good at helping me identify what was happening - e.g. being super alert, wanting to save or please people. Recognising these things helped to build better relationships with my work colleagues and my friends. I have conversations in my head - oh, you just want to please because something has frightened you. Then I say - you're okay, you're safe, you can say what you need to.

Basically, the strategy of self talk in a challenging way - I challenge what I'm doing, what I'm thinking. But I also recognise the little girl who screams out when things happen and comfort her. Very important to know she hurts terribly and needs comfort. The comfort she never received as a child.

159 Replies 159

Lady_Stardust
Community Member

Thank you for the responses, everyone. I’ll try to keep the advice in mind, and I’ll look for grounding techniques as well as keeping yours @labradoodle in mind. I’m sorry for everything all of you have gone through, and I’m here to listen if anyone would like to talk about anything.

@Elizabeth CP, please don’t feel stupid for feeling anything you might feel. Feelings are what make us full human beings. Allow yourself to feel. Is there anyone at your church you could talk to?

I don't feel I can talk to most people about the situation. Other people would just think I'm stpid reacting to something not directly impacting me. Trying to explain my history would be too hard & most people who have had no experience of PTSD wouldn't understand the impact so many years on. I was caught in a fire as a child which is what has left me so vulnerable to these situations.

Hiya Elizabeth.

I've posted you a response, but it hasn't appeared yet. Didn't think I'd said anything untoward., but hey you never know......

What for it pls.

Thanks for the detailed response. Ina situation with actual danger my response is flight even if the danger is very small. My psych believes that the likelihood of me acting irrationally if the situation escalated is too high to attempt to cope. This means that I have gone to a family members house & stayed until all danger is past. If I'm driving & see/smell smoke I try to remain as calm as possible & get away as quickly as possible. Then I try to distract myself reading or doing something else until I calm down enough to continue driving.

The issue today was that there was no actual danger to me. It was enough knowing that other people were in danger to send me into a bad state. I need to practise the breathing more so I can use it when needed. I forget about it when it is required. Unfortunately the beach is bad for me when it is hot. I enjoy it when cooler but I was badly sunburnt after visiting the beach a few days prior to the original fire so there is a link in my mind between fires, beach & sunburn. The lakes & parks near us which I like are also surrounded by bush so are not an option on high fire danger days for me. In a real threat it is easier for my husband to understand & support me but triggers that come without any real threat make no sense & feel harder to explain & leave me feeling stupid & very out of control. Your last dot point seems to be very important but I have trouble with it.

Hi Elizabeth CP,

I understand your hesitation. I think that’s a symptom of PTSD that’s not really spoken about, having a feeling of being ridiculed or disbelieved. And I’m really sorry that you don’t feel like you can talk to anyone about it, but talking about it here, I feel, is a positive stepping stone. PamelaR has some wonderful advice up there. (:

Hello everyone

Thank you for your positive feedback Lady Stardust.

I think you've raised a good point and sometime in the next day or two I will start a new thread about the ridicule and disbelief of PTSD and it's symptoms.

I know it is very hard to talking to people, but I am very selective who I talk too. When I worked there was a need for me to share some of my triggers. I felt safe with my immediate team. All lovely people. I never talked about the details only the fact there had been a traumatic event in my childhood. Most I think knew what it was, and never brought it up. They did always give me the support i needed when triggered. There understanding truly helped me stay at work. There are people who I'd never tell or would tell but knew I'd never get any understanding. That is the way of some.

I think that's why BB forums are so important. It really is good to be able to get out what is troubling you in a 'safe and caring' environment. It helps with healing.

Kind regards

PamelaR

Lady_Stardust
Community Member

I look forward to seeing that thread, PamelaR. It’s something that really resonates with me. Like I said, I’ve never actually spoken about what happened to me; I’ve revealed it in depth to one person, and even then I never said it aloud, we were talking online.

There’s still an insensitivity, especially now, on the internet where the whole concept of triggers is openly mocked. I can take a joke, but there are things that have been said that have been upsetting.

But just know, Elizabeth CP and anyone reading this who feels the same, no one here will ever think you’re stupid for what you feel. Ever. And we all believe you. All of us.

Thread has been started Lady Stardust, under PTSD, triggers and stigma. I think you've already found your way there:)

PamelaR
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hello everyone

It's been some time since this thread has surfaced. New people maybe interested in learning about how to manage their PTSD.

Also, I'd encourage everyone to add how they've managed their PTSD. All contributions are welcome.

Kind regards

PamelaR

PamelaR
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hello everyone

It's been so long since I've posted in this thread. I thought it's about time I bumped it back to the top again. There have been a number of people posting in the PTSD and trauma section who may have their own coping mechanisms to share. I truly hope so. There are some very good and positive stories out there at the moment.

I'd love to see some of those great survival and coping stories included here for others to read. And add to!

For me coping with PTSD (and cPTSD) is ongoing. I've recovered from the initial shock of remembering, however, I still get triggered, I still get hypervigilant. Though these are so much more manageable these days. It's kind of like saying to myself - oh yeah, been triggered, breathe, do some mindfulness, find the cause, do some realignment with my thinking, let go of the trigger and I'm back on track.

Once it could take me weeks to months to get back on track. Now I think I'm managing it within a week. For me that's an improvement. I'd like to not go down into the depths, but I can live with it.

Anyone else out there who is finding they are improving? What have you done to help your recovery? Would love to hear your story/stories.

Kind regards

PamelaR