Feeling down due to fatigue & undiagnosed health issues
I haven't been using the forums much apart from a couple of responses to others posts. I stopped as I was too busy & trying to keep up with the forums was becoming too stressful. In September My husband went to Europe which was great although tiring due to the pace of the tour we did. Unfortunately a few days before returning home I fell heavily on concrete steps hurting my right side. I continued on relying on icepacks to manage the pain. I couldn't sleep because of the pain when lying down. The last day I came down with a bad cold which developed into a chest infection later on. The pain eased after 6 weeks & I recovered from the chest infection but have ongoing problems with fatigue & abdominal discomfort. My GP arranged pathology tests. The blood tests are normal but urine isn't. Today I was sent for a ultrasound of kidneys & bladder. Next week I have a gastroscopy & colonoscopy. My stress levels seem to be escalating out of proportion each time I see the GP & get sent for more tests. Prior to my accident my mental health issues were settling down but the last week it is much worse. I have lost my temper a few times in the last week without much provocation. This is not normal for me. I have been on a diet for several months but I am now finding it really hard to stick to it I just want to go & eat food I know will make me feel worse. The diet is a healthy one which I normally find easy to stick to because the food is satisfying.
I just want to get back on track & feel in control of my life & not feel so stressed & down. I also feel guilty for feeling this way because There is no confirmation of a serious illness.
I had muesli with yogurt & milk. Breakfast seems to be the easiest meal as I find the muesli healthy & satisfying while easy to make. I made bread for lunch in my breadmaker using homeground wheat. I was doing it regularly last year while on my diet as I found it more satisfying than shop bought bread. I then stopped so got out of the habit. We had some cold meat & salad with the bread for lunch.
I need to keep working on the visualisation till it gets easier to overcome all the negative stuff in my head. The trip to England will not be relaxing. I will be very tired when I arrive & will take time to settle due to the jetlag & long flight. I am trying to think of ways to manage this to enable me to cope as well as possible. I'have planned a couple of driving tours which have the potential to be really fun if organised well but could be very stressful if not since I have to drive, navigate, pack unpack, & help my husband in unfamiliar environments etc etc. I am trying to plan the drives in as much detail as possible to make it as easy for me as possible. I need the driving instructions written in a way I can follow them very easily. This means there is a lot of planning to do now but hopefully it will be worth it. My aim is to have as much time to walk & explore interesting places. I'm leaving the time at my son's for him to organise. He has a second car so I won't need to drive while there which will give me a welcome break. I just remembered it will be blackberry season so I can pick blackberries behind my son's. Big juicy tasty ones not like our dry insipid Aussi ones!!!
It would be physically and emotionally draining for you when hubby is sick like that. You need to keep a close eye on him don't you? Have you ever considered respite, where like a carer comes in over night etc? Mmm maybe you have or it's been talked about before, I cannot remember.
I long to help in some way, but I just do not know how to Elizabeth. So I hope by you venting out stuff helps a bit. And I do hope you get some kind of rest and that your hubby picks up again real quick.
Thank you Shell for your thoughts. It helps having someone listening & encouraging me. Respite overnight won't work unfortunately. Our attempt at having a carer come proved unsatisfactory. Once the NDIS starts I hope to arrange something. We have a couple of ideas to set something up on a regular basis so we can build a relationship with a carer so the carer understands my husband's needs so if something goes wrong & we need respite we have someone who knows what is required.
My husband is a little better but still unwell.
Hi Elizabeth, I was thinking of you again and wondering about a couple of things.
How are you getting along for one. And how is your hubby , is he feeling any better? And the other thing was, well I was thinking it must be getting close to the time you are heading over to the UK. And I wanted to say , may you have a relaxing and special time over there. And that you enjoy your visit with your family.
Thanks Shell for your kind thoughts. I leave next week so I've been really busy. Because of my husband's condition I need to plan in detail so I can cope. I used to enjoy doing things on the spur of the moment. I would look at brochures or maps as my husband drove & decide on the spot where to go but now I have to drive & navigate & if I don't know where I'm going I get really stressed.
My husband is much better fortunately. I am up & down. I am trying to walk most days but avoiding unhealthy food is a real struggle.Sleep is still an issue although better than a couple of days ago.
It looks like things are a bit better, with even a little more sleep. I'm glad for you.
I know the planning thing. I've tried to get across capital cities by making strip maps so I don't need to do much except count intersections. Never seems to work out exactly as planned, but normally close enough.
Walking is a great thing, getting away from an environment associated with stress and fresh views (inside and outside) quite apart from the physical benefits.. You are wise to try to keep it up.
Getting ready for a trip like yours is a pretty monumental task. Good news your husband is much better