Hi MOOGAL,
I’m deeply sorry for your loss. I think grief is truly one of the most difficult things we can go through in life...you must miss him terribly...
You sound like you shared an incredible bond with your grandfather. That is truly precious...he sounds like he was, in many ways, your anchor. Someone trustworthy and reliable who has always been there for you...a true friend...
I imagine it must have been emotional contacting your brother. I would think that there would have been a lot of mixed feelings there. On the one hand, he has hurt a lot of people like your mum. But on the other hand, like you said, he’s also the only person to understand what you’re going through...
Sigh, I have lost loved ones too, and I personally don’t think “time heals.” I simply think i have learnt to cope without certain people over time.
I don’t think we ever stop missing loved ones. For every loss I’ve had, I’ve also lost a bit of my heart. It hurts...
That being said, I think everyone is different. There’s no “rule book” or “manual” or “right/wrong” when it comes to grief and loss...
I hope you don’t mind if I share 2 quotes about grief with you. I hope it offers some small comfort, validation or makes you feel a little less alone:
It’s just fine to feel a little heavy, and it’s fine to just sit here and catch my breath, and it’s just fine to be a mess at times, and it’s fine to be relatively normal sometimes.
It’s just fine to miss them. It’s just fine to let it all hit me, surrendering and succumbing. And it’s just fine to remember that grief has no rules, and that it really, it will last as long as Love does.
- unknown
Grief, I’ve learned, is really just love. It’s all the love you want to give but cannot. All of that unspent love gathers up in the corner of your eyes, the lump in your throat, and in that hollow part of your chest. Grief is just Love with no place to go.
- unknown
Kind thoughts to you today...
Pepper
