Losing a friend/lover
Hi Ajn86. Please accept my sincerest condolences on this tragic loss. The pain he was in was really nothing to do with you re-entering his life, that is something you have to start believing. I would say everything he was going through, problems with his ex, children possibly causing him to stress, worrying how the divorce and all that was involved there, would affect the children. How old are the children? They must be feeling pretty devastated by losing their dad so tragically. Maybe his ex was also causing him angst about him re-connecting with you. It could be that he was also physically unwell and just couldn't reach out in time. Maybe you could write him a letter, telling him you love him and wish he could've been saved. Let him know you'll never forget the happiness you shared. Try to focus on the good memories. Sometimes when people are emotionally 'broke' they lash out at the nearest person, in this case, you. Perhaps he couldn't unleash his anger anywhere else and you were the unfortunate recipient. If you do write, let him know you forgive him his anger. I'm sure if he could've apologised, he would've. Angry voice mails usually mean momentary anger, not long lasting. It's possible he also messaged his ex similarly to the one you got. I'm sure you will love again, maybe not so intensely, but because you have loved, you will again.
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