I lost a friend to suicide

[Lonelydan]

My heart is broken my darling friend Alen decided to take his own life over the weekend he was the sweetest soul never hurt anyone. Survivor of childhood abuse Who fought every day of his life to try and overcome it. I'm so sorry baby I wished you had of called me oh told you I was here for you any time I love you forever I will miss you xxxxxxxxx

[Kazzl]

Hello Lonelydan

I am so very very sad to read this. My heart goes out to you our friend. The loss must feel unbearable at the moment. I want you to know that we are here for you, to support you, to cry with you. You are amongst your safe community, where you can express your grief freely.

Post if and when you want to Dan - I hope you'll let us know how you are. And please stay safe mate.

Kaz

[SourceShield]

My prayers and thoughts are with you Dan.

And, as Kaz has said...we are here for YOU too.

Anytime.

MuchLove.

Kaitoa Wolfe

[Doolhof]

Hi Lonelydan,

Sending you much sympathy and care. It must be extremely tough for you and all those who loved and cared for Alen to have him leave you all in this way so suddenly.

As Kaz and Kaitoa have mentioned, we, the community of caring people here at BB are here for you.

When a person takes their own life, it is very hard for the people left behind to understand and comprehend why. Please know in your heart and mind that you did not let Alen down in any way.

Sometimes those who are close to loved ones who die in any manner, may wish they had done things differently.

We can not turn the clock back, as much as we wish we could.

Thinking of you and letting you know you have support here.

From Mrs. D.

[MarkJT]

Dan, my sincere condolences go out to you and Alen's family and friends.

As is indicated above, you have the whole BB community firmly standing beside you. We are all interlinked through our own mental health journeys, regardless of religion or race.

We are and always will be, here for you.

Rest in peace Alen.

Mark.

[Cornstarch]

I'm so sorry Dan for your mate Alen, your grief will be really strong for a long time.

My Dad took his own life in 2010 and you'll never forget that phone call.

The horrible reality is that when someone close to you does that, for everyone that they know, their risk goes up. It is not uncommon to have two in one family or friendship circle.

Shock is an incredible drug but like all drugs it does wear off. What that means for you is that the emotions will get stronger and come up at the most odd occasions and when we least expect it.

I would have permanent arrangements set in place with a clinical psychologist and I would go to the GP today and tell them what has happened.

You don't want to find yourself in a crisis a couple of weeks/months/years from now and not have support, and you don't have to be expected to carry this alone.

Please keep communicating.

It's hard to find words in these situations, I hope you see your worth

xxxxx

[geoff]

dear Dan, this has very much broken your heart, that you now have to cope with is unbelievably so sad for you to lose someone you loved and cared for.
Losing a friend to suicide is nothing that can ever be dismissed because it remains with you for such a long time, and I have never said this before on this site but I have lost two great friends to suicide, one who was my neighbour and the other a person I played rugby with, both in horrific circumstances, and like you I was totally shocked but more so saddened by not having them with us anymore.
We all feel for you to what has happened, but I hope you can understand that you have so many loyal friends here on this site who definitely want to listen to your grief and try and help you out. Geoff.

[Lonelydan]

Hi kazzl, thankyou for your thoughtful reply. your words were so soothing and calming I can tell you must be a mum. I'm feeling ok I've picked myself off the floor again I don't think I will be able to do it another time what gets back up is becoming less human I see it in my eyes there dead I'm emotional and physically exhausted but I must go on I want my life and my baby is due any day now with my second grandchild and it's a girl that has kept me alive thank you thank you thank you for having time for me. Danny.

[Lonelydan]

Hi mrs D, I would like show my deep appreciation for your reply. it means so much to me to know there a women like you in this world. its impossible not to blame yourself. I had a thought to call him that night even though I had spoken to him the day before he was ok. it will always haunt me that I didn't I know he regrets his decision I feel it. My life has been horrible but I still want it and I'm so glad there a wonderful people like you. Thanks so much. Danny...

[Lonelydan]

Hi Mark, Thank you for acknowledging Allen loss and his family his sister is devastated unfortunately his parents couldn't have cared less such disgusting people makes me so angry and I'm angry at alen to. I don't have the time of day for my parents best decision I ever made to never look back. Wish alen had done the same. Again thank for taking time to reply its really appreciated. Danny..