Friend may have depression (maybe?)

[Winnie333]

Hey everyone!

I am new to this forum and thankyou Beyond Blue for creating a space like this 🙂

I want to get some insight to how others deal with depression and see if you have any suggestions for me to help as a friend.

A bit of context

My friend is a typical middled age man with 2 adult kids and has expressed to me lately being tell me his feels suicidual (thinking about it/minor self-harm) and has no interest in anything. He also calls this no interest a "volid" in which he tries to fill it up with hobbies, volunteer, working 2 jobs etc. He says he has everything stable in his life, but his just sad and feels the only way to deal with this 'volid' is to die. Its crazy because his also very smart and learns alot about many different things (e.g. holds 4 degrees, can play 2 instructments, speaking 3 languages etc). Also this 'volid' feeling for him has being going on for years, according to him (I would assume since maybe his 20s).

He gets moody from time to time and its sometimes hard to talk about his feelings as his not very expressive and negative (e.g. "I don't want to talk about" or "I just want to hurt myself" etc). Funny enough in person his fun, energtic and got a wick sense of humour and the 'depressed' side is not what he shows to everyone. Also in real life his still works 2 jobs and in his spare time, at the moment, learning to code (very impressive!). His recenlty also started taking up drinking 2 bottles of beer each night, which is very unusual for him as well. Its good that he talks about this issue, but he did say I am the only person he mentioned it to.

I have also given him phone numbers to helplines and counselling services (which I am not surprised.... he does not take action). I have asked other friends about how they handled a situation similar to this. They emphasised a lot on keeping the communication open, which I have being doing. I hope it does make him feel better in some way.

Questions

1. What is this volid? He doesn't really describe this feeling of emptiness very well and I have asked a few times.

2. How do others deal with 'no interest'?

3. What has being helpful things your friends/family have done?

4. And how do you encourage a person to go on a recovery jounrey

5. What ways can I encourage him to seek professional help

Please share your stories 🙂 I would love to know and understand 😄

Thankyou kindly everyone 🙂 🙂