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dr jekyl and mr hyde

ccdep71
Community Member

I have been suffering depression and anxiety for 2 years now, on meds not really sure if they working. I was in an extremely dark place but now there seems to be a shift. My emotional moods seem to reflect those of dr jekyl and mr hyde. I am ok sometimes...can talk to people smile occassionally laugh, then to the next extreme, angry at everyone who was nice to me. If someone compliments me I still know it isn't true and cannot accept it. I break down in tears cant control my emotions at all and now use self harm to try and ease this pain.This may go on for 2-3 days and then i feel the regret, remorse, guilt for treating people so badly. It is such a vicious cycle right now that it is really doing me in. I don't understand what is happening to me at all.

Just needed to express myself as tonight is a low night.

Thanks


2 Replies 2

christopher
Community Member
Hi, you appear to be going through the same sort of stages that most of us have gone through with depression. In my opinion I would return to your GP and see if he can change your meds or at least help you with your current situation. I used to go through the same things, when I say used to, I still do just a lot milder now that I take meds. I had very dark days, crying and anger, would love people one minute and then could not stand them to be around me. Could not even stand having my family around me, used to always be angry with them. Its not that you are a bad person, its basically out of your control. When I got angry I would try and make some space around me, not always easy, take my dog for a walk. It's bloody hard I know but you just have to try and lift yourself. You will get there, takes time. I am happy to chat all night long if that is going to help you. Take care. Chris

geoff
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

dear Ccdep, has your doctor diagnosed your condition, or just said that you have depression, or have they said you may have bipolar.

Click onto 'resources' at the top of this page and order the free information which BB can send out to you, and BB must have more information on bipolar, so I would contact them.

There is David Charles who will probably reply back to you, but as yet it doesn't show, he has had bipolar for a long long time, and he knows far more about this illness than I do. Geoff.