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Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

Chris_B Are you looking to support someone else with depression? PLEASE READ before posting
  • replies: 0

This forum is for people seeking support for their own mental health issues. If you're posting on behalf of someone else with a mental health issue that you're concerned about, please have a look at this section of our forums: Supporting family and f... View more

This forum is for people seeking support for their own mental health issues. If you're posting on behalf of someone else with a mental health issue that you're concerned about, please have a look at this section of our forums: Supporting family and friends with a mental health condition It's full of threads from people who have family members and friends going through anxiety, depression or other related conditions. Have a read through the threads there, and feel free to take part in the discussions. Below are also some helpful beyondblue resources you might want to look through first as well: Supporting someone Have the conversation

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Tiger_lily Prisoner to sadness
  • replies: 5

I was officially diagnosed about 9 months ago, but have suffered with depression on and off for a much longer period. My 'black dog' presents itself as waves of crippling sadness, emotional outbursts and tears for no apparent reason. These instances ... View more

I was officially diagnosed about 9 months ago, but have suffered with depression on and off for a much longer period. My 'black dog' presents itself as waves of crippling sadness, emotional outbursts and tears for no apparent reason. These instances then make me think negatively about many aspects of my life, pulling me deeper and deeper into the darkness. I often have problems sleeping (nights are the worst for me) and rarely have much of an appetite. I have chosen to be very private about my illness, and have only confided in my partner. I've become very good at hiding my depression. However, my condition now leads me to doubt my relationship with my partner and second guess everything. I hate being so down all the time, I miss feeling joy and happiness in my life and I am scared I am losing the ones I love because sometimes I just can't face the day, and they confuse this with me being disinterested or choosing to be alone. I am finding it increasingly more difficult to be in social situations, as I struggle to find anything positive to say about myself, and I feel very uncomfortable when my friends talk about how happy their lives are. I no longer enjoy my job, and obsess over even the smallest negative situation. I want to escape this dark prison. I am sick of this constant weight bearing down on me. I want to enjoy life again. I do not want to take meds, but would welcome some suggestions for coping methods to get through the dark days.

PugsLoveHugs Undiagnosed for too long?
  • replies: 4

Hi there,Some of my earliest memories at 6 or 7 years of age include my parents yelling exhausted that "I'm only being miserable because I enjoy it" when I couldn't stop crying. I got stuffed toys when I didn't cry for a full 2 weeks after things wer... View more

Hi there,Some of my earliest memories at 6 or 7 years of age include my parents yelling exhausted that "I'm only being miserable because I enjoy it" when I couldn't stop crying. I got stuffed toys when I didn't cry for a full 2 weeks after things were too much. At high school I saw various psychologists in and out of school, only to be told by one "you definitely don't have depression" before they'd even assessed me, as I was in a rare good mood and able to be myself, and the others focussed on the typical teenager things like friendships and parents. I was really mad when a friend of mine got mild depression in year 12 so got to miss out assignments, when I was told I didn't, despite all the times I'd sat in the corner of a room bawling, trying to harm myself, or hid in a dark cupboard to cry. This girl was going through a teenager phase of dying her hair etc and had never even tried to kill herself, and there was me, with my fully formed plan but just the resolution "I'll wait and see what uni is like, just hang on a few months longer" to stop me. Now I'm 20, on and SNRI an SSRI and a mood stabiliser each day but I still have terrible swings of happy (lasting 4hrs up to 3 days) then flat the rest of the time and the occasional 5 day depression fit, complete with bawling my eyes out, inability to function, and again telling myself "You'll graduate in 2 years, that'll be better" (not that I don't like uni, but being unable to do what I want or have any people respect me iskilling me) I was only diagnosed last year, by a proper psychologist (first one i've seen). He reckons it has been unnoticed for so long that it will never go away, we just have to keep on top of it by rotating different doses and seeing what works, yet they all fail within 3 months or less, with usually disastrous consequences. Today I had SLSWA state championships, the greatest day of the year, and won a bronze medal which was damn good for our first season as a team. And yet I broke down several times because people were treating me unfairly, like I wasn't equal to them, that I was worthless. They don't mean too I know, but why do it?!? It has made me so upset that I don't think I can go to the after party which starts in 15 minutes, which I have been looking forward to all year. I just wanted to share in case it makes others feel better

happyface Not sure what to do
  • replies: 4

Hi There, I think I need to seek help but I've tried twice previously and both times ended quite badly. I just sucked it all up, got on with life and kept on sweeping feelings under the carpet, so to speak. I'm in a position where suddenly everything... View more

Hi There, I think I need to seek help but I've tried twice previously and both times ended quite badly. I just sucked it all up, got on with life and kept on sweeping feelings under the carpet, so to speak. I'm in a position where suddenly everything around me has come crashing down. My husband has just had some bad news at work, my small not-for-profit company I started has fallen apart, my career is all but over and my plan to retrain at university next year is pretty much in doubt because of my husband's work issues. Even when in the absolute throws of depression previously, I've always been able to (with much effort) claw my way out, see a light at the end of the tunnel - anything to hold on but this time, I just, there just doesn't seem to be a light. I still force myself out of bed every morning, do my work to try and fix everyone else's problems (because they become my own eventually), do what I need to but the whole day all I want to do is go back to bed, I'm exhausted yet at night time, I do everything I can to stay awake - watch tv, play on my phone, you name it, I'll do it. I guess I don't know what's wrong with me - I don't know how to move forward and I'm nervous of seeking professional help again after the last two experiences. I don't know if this will just pass and I'm being weak or whether I should accept I'm not perfect - heck, I just don't really know anymore. I don't even know what it is I'm looking for here to be honest. Thank you to anyone who does reply.

hating_life Why it comes back?
  • replies: 3

I hate it so much when it comes back out of nowhere...I feel so down and when it comes it is worst than before. I am still on counseling and medication but I really hate it so much. I wish I could understand it as when I thought I am on road of recov... View more

I hate it so much when it comes back out of nowhere...I feel so down and when it comes it is worst than before. I am still on counseling and medication but I really hate it so much. I wish I could understand it as when I thought I am on road of recovery, it comes back hard.

Despirited the Shadow of my existence
  • replies: 10

It's 4 o'clock in the morning - the day has not even started. I lie awake in my bed, gripped by the fear of the Shadow. I feel its presence just lurking in the darkness nearby. On with the lights, and look under my bed? No, I don't want to see it. I ... View more

It's 4 o'clock in the morning - the day has not even started. I lie awake in my bed, gripped by the fear of the Shadow. I feel its presence just lurking in the darkness nearby. On with the lights, and look under my bed? No, I don't want to see it. I don't want to find it. I wish that Shadow away, but it taunts me and it tells me I will never be free. The Shadow it owns me, for I am its slave. Morning is coming, and I exist yet again. Nobody doth like me, especially not I. Why would they, how could they, for I am so gray. Held down by this Shadow in the darkness of despair. I am so tired of this life, why must I be here? Help do I seek in taming this demonic Shadow At a time when I struggle to think straight, my mind but a blur. Tangled inside, and lost in myself, must get back to the light, did I think Away from that Shadow that plagues my soul and blinds my sight. Before I am free, that Shadow doth return, takes me back into despair. I thought I could fight it, defeat it and win. Thought I was better, For I can see hope, and I feel the light, but I cannot defeat it For confused is my mind; it is stronger than me! It cannot be beaten, no the Shadow has won. I must break free from this Shadow but I am too weak to defeat it So I bow down to the Shadow and it keeps me down I can't defeat the darkness, with anguish all consuming, I just lay here and let the Shadow take me back to the Hell of my existence. I am lost.

Makinmesick500 Finally Reaching out to people that know what its like!
  • replies: 7

Well I finally decided to reach out and try talking to people that know what it is like to live with Depression. I have been suffering On and Off from depression for about 5 years now and honestly this time is the worst I have had it. I am at that st... View more

Well I finally decided to reach out and try talking to people that know what it is like to live with Depression. I have been suffering On and Off from depression for about 5 years now and honestly this time is the worst I have had it. I am at that stage when I wake up upset or feeling over it and then go to bed at night time with the same feeling. I feel like crying but I just cant?!! I have to drag myself out of bed in the morning then 2 hours later I feel soooo tired that I just want to go back to bed but as I work full time I cant always do this. I also feel sick to the stomach all of the time and just feel so off! I have been on medication for pretty much the whole time since I got diagnosed and since things are worse now they have decided to bump it up for a month to see how it goes. I don't feel happy doing anything. I use to be such a happy person that use to laugh and joke and smile all the time and now I feel like I am someone that nobody wants to be around because I am no longer the person I use to be. I don't like anything anymore. I feel like I just want to hide in my bedroom all of the time and not bother with going outside! I am sorry that all I have written is about how I feel but I really needed to get things off my chest. I find that I can talk to people (non sufferers) but don't get the feeling that they actually know what Is going on. I am interested to hear other peoples opinions and sorry if this thread isn't what this forum is about. I am new at this..

Im_2 Depression hero
  • replies: 2

I don't want to believe but it might be fact that i has a by born symptom of fear,sadness and depression. I have trying for long time but fail to get any result to get rid of it, perhaps i did not tried properly.

I don't want to believe but it might be fact that i has a by born symptom of fear,sadness and depression. I have trying for long time but fail to get any result to get rid of it, perhaps i did not tried properly.

squeak Impatient
  • replies: 4

I have been fighting depression now for more years than I care to remember, and it has always taken the same course, that is I find it difficult to do anything and that means anything. Like every one else here I struggle on a day to day basis with ju... View more

I have been fighting depression now for more years than I care to remember, and it has always taken the same course, that is I find it difficult to do anything and that means anything. Like every one else here I struggle on a day to day basis with just getting out of bed, getting into the shower, going to work and dealing with the household chores. I usually dont want to move or go any where and I don't feel any joy in any part of my life. I have had breast cancer four years ago and I am still fighting that battle as well, my husband is an alchoholic and my daughter who is only 28 is very ill and has just had two hip replacements due to a metobolic bone disease and now there is complications with that, so I dont feel as if there is any light at the end of the tunnel, but just recently I have found myself very agitated and extremley impatient to the point that I want to smash things and throw things, I yell and scream and get very angry with everyone around me, I have road rage and I find it difficult to go out in public as I want to abuse any one who gets in my way in the shops etc. Has any one else experienced periods of impatience with their depression. Looking foward to hearing your thoughts on this. - Thanks J

longingforchange plummeted in to depression
  • replies: 4

In the past two months I have what I can only describe as plummeted in to depression. It was triggered by some work my husband and I had decided to have done around our home yet afterwards I was left feeling like it was one of the worst decisions of ... View more

In the past two months I have what I can only describe as plummeted in to depression. It was triggered by some work my husband and I had decided to have done around our home yet afterwards I was left feeling like it was one of the worst decisions of my life and feel constant dread at being in my own home for no logical reason. It started out as anxiety and panic attacks after the work had been done when I realised I couldn’t undo it but desperately wanted to. I’ve experienced panic attacks on and off for 9 years but not recently. The anxiety has retreated somewhat but has been replaced by a deepening depression and feelings of worthlessness and in making wrong decisions in my life. Looking back I know I’ve had depression for some years, including what I believe was post natal depression after I had my daughter who’s now 8 1/2 but was much too scared at the time to admit to anyone that I needed any help or wasn’t coping. Each time I seem to have been able to pull myself out from the depths of darkness but this time feels different. It feels like all of the dark times rolled in to one and I’m not even sure why it has occurred this time, why now? I was feeling so scared that I reached out to my husband and family and started seeing a psychologist which I certainly wouldn't have considered doing in the past. Telling my family of my depression makes me feel like im burdening them which they say it isn’t but I can see their not being able to help me is affecting them too. I don’t feel like im making any progress as my feelings haven’t changed but I do find talking to the psychologist helps, yet is only a temporary feeling until I get home again and my negative thoughts return. All of this turns in to guilt. So many people are in much worse situations, are terminally ill, in bad relationships, have sick loved ones etc. I have no reason to be depressed. I have lovely children, a supportive husband, a stable job, my own home which ive just had work done to, there should be no reason to be depressed. Yet im so desperately unhappy. For a long time ive been busy with full time work, uni, kids after school and weekend activities and a business. I've been functioning on auto pilot for so long but now i dont feel like i can get out of bed and function. My GP wanted to put me on antidepressants but i'm scared of the effect they may have on me and if they will even be able to help. I keep reading that you're not alone but depression really is such a lonely feeling.

Jo3 Depressed about stuffing up again
  • replies: 13

Why is it that everytime I do something I stuff up big time?? I hate it so much that now I am hating myself so much. I had a session last night with my regular therapist. He gave me work to do on the moodgym website. I started last night. But then I ... View more

Why is it that everytime I do something I stuff up big time?? I hate it so much that now I am hating myself so much. I had a session last night with my regular therapist. He gave me work to do on the moodgym website. I started last night. But then I thought I would like a session next week to discuss certain issues I have but never have time to talk about it. So I emailed him last night. He replied this morning with - no I don't have any appts for the whole week, I will see you the following week and we can put these issues down on a list to talk about then. And he also told me not to email him a reply because he knew that I would be angry with him and he didn't want a reply. Oh yes I was damn angry with him - why couldn't he fit me in somewhere; why does he have to have boundaries; So what did I do? - I emailed him back in my state of rage with him. I asked him if I could then speak with him today. His reply was no we will talk on Monday. That made me even more angry so I replied back saying that I was so damn angry with him and that I hated him. (He knows that I don't really hate him). He never replied back. So I guess I have to wait until Monday, It annoys me because I know that my behaviour was very childish, and prob manipulative as well. All I wanted was to talk to him or even better have another session. I stuff up all the time; maybe he should give up on me for good. Jo