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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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lost_echo Constant empty feeling
  • replies: 4

recently i finished my hsc and went travelling for a couple weeks before returning back home. during the periods of study, exams and travelling, my mind was very occupied with the things i had to do that in a way i was able to avoid the constant voic... View more

recently i finished my hsc and went travelling for a couple weeks before returning back home. during the periods of study, exams and travelling, my mind was very occupied with the things i had to do that in a way i was able to avoid the constant voices in my head and the numbing feeling of depression. however, now that im back, i feel like i have fallen back into a pit and the waves of depression has returned. i have been dealing with mdd for over 3 years now and i feel like every year it gets worse and worse but i dont want to get hospitalised so i never really go into detail of the thoughts that play in my head constantly. these days i have just been feeling extremely low and listless. while people my age are thinking about their uni lives, i'm here literally just living because i have to. i know its just my depression but i have nihilism and everything just seems so useless, especially with all the global events occurring at the same time, it makes me lose faith in humanity and purpose to continue the existence of humans. that's not to say all humans are bad, it's just that the majority worldly leaders of earth who makes society, the economic and the overall functioning of the earth is doing a really crappy job and to imagine that im going to be a part of that workforce in a couple years is daunting. i just want everything to be over so that i can be free and escape this life. i wish an asteroid hits earth all humans can be free together.

Earth Girl People tell me I'm doing things wrong, but won't explain to me exactly what and how
  • replies: 2

People from school keep indirectly telling me to do better, but they never directly explained to me exactly what it is that I am doing wrong. I want to be a nice person, and I try to be, but it's really hard figuring out what the problem is when peop... View more

People from school keep indirectly telling me to do better, but they never directly explained to me exactly what it is that I am doing wrong. I want to be a nice person, and I try to be, but it's really hard figuring out what the problem is when people are very vague about it. They indirectly tell me... That I'm vain, superficial and socially fake, but don't explain how/what it is that I'm doing that makes me so.That I'm stubborn, but don't explain how.That I'm unforgiving That I only want what's best for meThat I lack warmth and humilityThat I'm materialisticThat I'm pretentiousThat I believe in stereotypes That I'm manipulative (I've looked this word up many times, but still don't get it, but it's definitely something that I wouldn't want to be because apparently, it's sort of like controlling people in a really mean way?) I also don't know how exactly I am doing this though or what it means. That I'm heartless - If you're going to call someone this especially, PLEASE explain what exactly they are doing that makes them this because nobody wants to be like this. That I don't say please and thank you - I use to not do this a lot for a stage when I was a teenager when I was using another forum, but I realized I was being rude and it probably didn't make people feel good even though they were helping me so I started doing it again so I don't see how I am still doing this? There have been times other than when I used that site when it didn't occur to me to say thank you, but it wasn't because I didn't appreciate them. I struggle a lot socially so sometimes I will think "that was nice what that person did for me" and then think "Oh, I probably should have said thank you." I say it when it occurs to me though, because I want people to know that I appreciate what they've done for me. That I don't let others have opinions - again, no examples given.That I'm jealous of others instead of just being envious and using that to get better - I don't know how I'm still acting jealous?That I'm unfriendlySelfishHypocriticalEtc... If you're going to tell someone these things, but don't explain to them how they are doing these things/acting this way, it kind of defeats the purpose. And when I politely ask them if they could please explain how I am only caring about material things or what stereotypes I believe in for example, they just get mad at me. It's really hard to stop doing something wrong when you don't know exactly what it is that you are doing wrong.

JacintaMarie Can't get rid of anger
  • replies: 1

Hi againI've been okay, but I can't stop my anger about my management. I go okay than I get angry than depressed.I don't have evidence against them, just a gut feeling. I think I'm the only one, as everyone else thinks their great. My brain is gettin... View more

Hi againI've been okay, but I can't stop my anger about my management. I go okay than I get angry than depressed.I don't have evidence against them, just a gut feeling. I think I'm the only one, as everyone else thinks their great. My brain is getting filled up with crap & its sore in my head. I don't know why I can't let it go, & just them get on with it, as they'll be found out sooner or later, but I just can't. And do my work & just get paid. I think it might be because I don't think their very good & gotta find evidence, so government can rid of them.I want my brain to be peaceful, but don't know how.And it is terrible to think your management are not very good & they'll be there until they retire, so between 9 and 28 years.Just want peace in brain & to be able to let them go. All my ideas are stupid, the people aren't doers & you need to climb up to make changes.Also depressing, is that even if I leave, the new place will be the same, so gotta "fix" myself before I leave. It was my fault, as I write this, I made my head sore.

Guest_63674208 i’m lost
  • replies: 2

i have a horrible relationship with food, i overeat and genuinely can’t help myself and eat until i feel sick. my sleep schedule is horrible, i had something very bad happen to me a bit over a year ago regarding consent, i’m sad every single day and ... View more

i have a horrible relationship with food, i overeat and genuinely can’t help myself and eat until i feel sick. my sleep schedule is horrible, i had something very bad happen to me a bit over a year ago regarding consent, i’m sad every single day and have self harmed previously but haven’t in a long time but it’s hard to ignore the temptation. i’m so demotivated and i don’t know what to do anymore i can’t keep my feelings bottled up anymore. i went through a really bad breakup with who i thought was the love of my life and still haven’t completely gotten over that. i just need someone to talk to

adri4na_em i dont know anything
  • replies: 1

there are so many things i feel that kinda go against eachother. i like to do things but then at the same time im always so unmotivated, everything feels like an effort, but sometimes i like to do things so i feel like everythings an excuse for how i... View more

there are so many things i feel that kinda go against eachother. i like to do things but then at the same time im always so unmotivated, everything feels like an effort, but sometimes i like to do things so i feel like everythings an excuse for how i feel. I have no diagnoses, i cant because i dont think my family would even be open to that. i feel so many different things and i feel like no one truly understands me. sometimes i feel like im just lazy and making up excuses for the way i act and im trying to blame something to have a reason why but i feel like i see signs of depression in myself. for maybe almost 3 years now ive just gotten worse. i struggle with pretty bad (i dont know) body image issues that have driven me to want and do certain things (still undiagnosed to). i dont know if my lack of energy and motivated is because of that. (reasons for being tired) or if its the depression i could be speculating. i dont really enjoy anything. i dont have any hobbies. im not interested in anything. i kinda really hate going out unless its something im really excited for. i hate being percieved a lot of the time. i just feel super ugly and sometimes i dont exactly know what my future is going to lead. i dont know what i have going for me exactly. i dont want to die but i also have just no idea what im living for. i dont care about anything that much. maybe i am just super lazy but i feel like i just want to be understood by someone. i want to know if there is answer to why i feel things that i feel a lot of the time. i want to know whats wrong and why cant i do and want to do a lot of the things that people do. all my friends can do it but why to me does everything feel like the biggest task ever. like i just cant picture myself really doing anything. i dont know. i spend most of my time, unmotivated to move in my room. i dont like it but i also just dont like doing anything else. a lot of the time im moody. i kinda get irritated easily and i dont mean to be like that. i want to be a great friend and be a really great person but sometimes the way i feel (lacking the motivation to go out with friends soemtimes or just the effort of it all) makes me feel like i just cant really be a great friend but not in that way. i dont know. i just have so many things to kinda say but cant put it into words.

NannyK Need tools to escape depression
  • replies: 3

Hi Everyone, A bit of background first. I've been diagnosed with Agoraphobia, Depression and PTSD as well as suffering from akathesia and am neurodivergent. I have had therapy to deal with these things and have tools that I use to help. Due to the ak... View more

Hi Everyone, A bit of background first. I've been diagnosed with Agoraphobia, Depression and PTSD as well as suffering from akathesia and am neurodivergent. I have had therapy to deal with these things and have tools that I use to help. Due to the akathesia I can't take SSRIs. I also suffered chronic pain in both my knees for 15 years that caused a lot of depression and as a result I became suicidal. A few years back I had surgery to replace my knees and blessedly, no more pain. My previous bouts of depression had morphed straight to suicidal thoughts, and all the therapy has dealt with that specifically. My current dilemma. I have over the last year lost all interest in everything. I do nothing and get frustrated and cranky when I have to do anything. I don't feel things how I used to mostly I'm just "meh". Now it has got to the point where I just lay in bed, I don't sleep and am not tired. I have a very vivid imagination, and I go off into that. Something I did all the time as a kid to escape what happening around me. I rarely shower, brush my teeth, cook, clean or any of the things I normally do. I recognise I am depressed but do not know how to get out of this. I function well with routines, and they have always been very important to me to function properly, but I can't seem to get back into it. Previously, therapy for my depression we only looked and helping with my suicidal thoughts and tools around that. This is the first time in my life I have felt this way. I have no tools or for some reason can't modify the tools I have to help. My doctor of 25 years has retired, and I have got a new one now and he doesn't understand why I can't use SSRIs. My akathesia goes crazy and I can't sleep at all or function properly due to lack of sleep and I can't sit or stand or remain still in any way. I can't afford to see a therapist and the waiting list is long for a free or cheaper one. What I would like to know is how to get back into my routines and habits of self-care and care for my home environment. I know if I can do this, I will be ok but can't seem to get it started. I know this is my escape but currently do not know what it is I am escaping. My life is ok and no major stressors but this. Sometimes I think I am escaping my escape. What tools have others used with depression to help them get back their self-care?

Ms-B Struggling alone and abandoned
  • replies: 1

Hi I haven’t been here for a very long time, but I’m really struggling at the moment and I’m often feeling this sense of desperation pumping through my body. Like I don’t know where to turn to. I feel so let down by community mental health they have ... View more

Hi I haven’t been here for a very long time, but I’m really struggling at the moment and I’m often feeling this sense of desperation pumping through my body. Like I don’t know where to turn to. I feel so let down by community mental health they have been so slack. I have a lot going on at the moment and it’s a really difficult time of the year. I’m safe, I wish I wasn’t, I have a lot of them bad dark thoughts, but I am safe.

LoneWolf Dysthymia, PTSD
  • replies: 10

Hello Good People, I am 78 and a hyper-sensitive male struggling with dysthymia and PTSD for the last 68 years. (A victim of a very immature narcissistyic father!) I tend to pick up on every subtle nuance in my surroundings. I play the game of life, ... View more

Hello Good People, I am 78 and a hyper-sensitive male struggling with dysthymia and PTSD for the last 68 years. (A victim of a very immature narcissistyic father!) I tend to pick up on every subtle nuance in my surroundings. I play the game of life, get hurt then socially isolate for several months. Fortunately I am blessed with musical and artictic talents which appears to soothe the savage beast. What I would like to know from other sufferers: Is it normal to run and hid for for such a long time or should I be seeking help? I am already on prescription medication! Thanks for taking the time to read this.

Numb No sledgehammer to break down my wall
  • replies: 2

Hello lovely people I am not new to here, however, sometimes, either I fall deep into my pity pot, or I wake to an impenetrable wall of overwhelming sense of hopelessness, and I am unable to break that wall down! I try each day, to achieve a small st... View more

Hello lovely people I am not new to here, however, sometimes, either I fall deep into my pity pot, or I wake to an impenetrable wall of overwhelming sense of hopelessness, and I am unable to break that wall down! I try each day, to achieve a small step forward or goal. I've mostly succeeded, but there are situations where life slaps me back into reality to remind me of my own ineptitude to triumph over adversity. Everyday, I am on the brink of crying. In fact, my heart aches daily. Regret eats my soul and I truly dislike the person who looks back at me in the mirror. I have a tremendous amount to be grateful for, but accepting to settle with my worthless contribution to life, is crushing my spirit. I've retired. Little friends, whom I hardly see, children grown with family of their own. Phone mostly silent daily! I am truly lonely. I feel judged because I don't work. I am trapped in my home perusing activities I find no pleasure in. In fact, I find most activities a useless objective only good in filling time. Why am I here. What's my purpose in life other than cleaning the same furniture/floors everyday. I volunteer (only to be guilted into more hours and days). I read at daycare (I love that) and I study to keep my mind active and alert. So why do I despise my life and especially the aged no body I've become, or in reality, always was and will be. I think I am a good person, but avoidance by others makes me wonder. My children prefer their fathers presence, as he buys their love and has connections in places that can benefit should they need. I can only offer my heart, hands, willingness, ears and food on the table. My goodness I am truly a worthless pathetic!

KA2007 self love
  • replies: 4

I'm not depressed. At least I think I'm not. I just didn't know where else to post this. I hate myself. I hate the way I look, the way I act, and I'm incredibly insecure. Whenever I do something or say something I always question myself afterwards. W... View more

I'm not depressed. At least I think I'm not. I just didn't know where else to post this. I hate myself. I hate the way I look, the way I act, and I'm incredibly insecure. Whenever I do something or say something I always question myself afterwards. When I dress up or put on makeup I'm always comparing myself to others. I go on diets to loose weight but they never end up working because I can't control myself. My self worth plummets to the ground, because if I can't control myself or motivate myself to loose weight, I'm worthless. When others have things that I don't: a skinny body, confidence, good academic results, and guys to go on dates with I start to resent them. And what makes it even worse is that these people are my friends. Whenever they achieve great things or score a date with a guy I should be happy for them. Instead I feel a raging swirl of jealousy and I hate that I feel this way. Am I really that insecure that I'm jealous of my own friends? I don't want to be that person. Late at night I'm consumed by my thoughts that tell me: "why can't I be a better person?", "why am I so lazy?", "why am I grades so bad?", "why am I so fat?", "why do guys never talk to me?", "I hate myself". Its a never ending cycle. I don't know what to do. People always say : "Love yourself!" or "find a hobby! that self confidence will find its way to you soon!". Yet no matter what I do I still hate myself. And I hate that I hate myself.