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Is anyone up for a chat?

Doolhof
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hi Everyone,

Sometimes it is great to have a place where you can just have a chat about something not related to your mental health. So here is the opportunity to have a general chat about anything and to maybe find a "friend" to help make the day feel brighter.

Occasionally I connect with people on the forums and a lovely  friendship develops, but it may seem to others that they are not welcome to join in the conversation. This is not the case.

So here is an opportunity for new friendships to happen.

Maybe you would like to share your favourite holiday destination, or place you would love to visit. If you could have any animal as a pet what would it be? What is your favourite flavoured ice cream?

For me right now I would love to be somewhere warm! We have been experiencing some rather cold weather where even the chooks water is freezing over during the night! Somewhere with a beach and warm sea to swim in would be lovely!

My favourite ice cream flavour would be Jaffa in one of those crunchy cones! I would love to be eating one down at that tropical beach paradise followed by a lovely fresh coconut and maybe a beach massage as well.

I will be dreaming about this as I drive around today for work listening to Meatloaf. Maybe I should be listening to The Beach Boys instead, but I don't think I have any of their music on CD.

Hope you all have a great day,

Cheers from Mrs. Dools

 

 

161 Replies 161

Doolhof
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Thanks for an enlightening discussion on religion. You have explained issues on faith and belief in a way that I have been thinking but unable to place into words. You express yourself so wonderfully.

A family member appears to have great pleasure in knocking my Christian beliefs. As I have mentioned previously, I am so aware of all the horrendous events and activities that have happened and still occur due to people and their religious beliefs. I am very willing to admit and acknowledge that Christians have perpetrated and participated in atrocities on fellow humans.

This family member does not allow me to have freedom of speech to express my own beliefs. According to him, he knows everything about religion and you would think that he has a personal connection with all the gods in the world to make an informed statement on if they really exist or not.

Occasionally I become extremely tired of his Christianity bashing, but as he is an elder, I listen patiently to what he is saying. On one occasion I stated "All I can say is that when we both die, one of us is in for a big surprise!"

I am very sorry to read that you had to endure suffering and abuse from both Nuns and other members of the clergy. I have heard a little of the abuse children have received from Nuns, but there doesn't seem to be as much acknowledgement of this side of the abuse.

While doing Children's studies we had a session on paedophiles. For some reason I had never thought of a female as being a paedophile. How naive was I ! I certainly understand that females can be just as brutal and can hurt people just as much as men can. I'm heading a little off track here.

Like you wrote, religion is a very personal thing. My siblings and I were brought up as Christians. I am now the only one in our family who still holds on to those Christian beliefs.

To me a belief in God is acknowledging their is a being that is greater than anything or anyone on this earth. It is like having a presence of love, peace, forgiveness, direction, guidance, hope, kindness and so much more with you all of the time. To me it does not mean that life is always going to be perfect! In the Bible it tells me there will be times of hardship and difficulties, but I can turn to God and He will comfort me.

My faith also provides me with the belief that there is existence after death, that heaven does exist, in a way that I myself on earth can never comprehend. Death is not the end for me.

pipsy
Community Member
Hi Lauren.  It's definitely a guy, he has posted a picture of himself and 9 year old son on fb.  I have decided to keep writing as penpal only.  He has made no demands whatsoever for money.   I told him a little about myself, my job, my interests.  I have told him nothing about my financial situation and he hasn't asked anything.  It turns out he's still on good terms with his ex, because of the child who lives with him.  I've actually had a post from his wife and she's quite nice.  She said she's pleased he has found a friend as he's quite a loner.  Don't know why they divorced, not my business.  He apparently is just lonely and wants a friend, he apologized for being forward, but still said he thought I was gorgeous.  His wife's actually invited me over to stay if I'm interested.  I think I have 2 penpals as a result.  I will be very careful not to get involved in any situation that could cause me embarrassment though.  The situation with hubby has made me realize how lonely I am for adult companionship.  It is nice to know someone is interested enough to ask what sort of day I've had, then actually listen instead of criticizing when I try to explain  difficulties I may have had.  My job involves working with the general public who can be fickle, plus a guy who puts me down because I have a Kiwi accent.  When I told hubby, he said 'rise above it'.  Easy for him, this happened on 3 separate occasions.  Hubby and I lead separate lives most of the time, he's busy with his interests.  Worries too much about elderly parents who tried to break us up.  He's emotionally immature and tends to jump to their tune.  It's hardly surprising I'm flattered by another man's interest.     

Dear Pipsy

A comment about your new friend. It may appear you are receiving emails from his ex but it may also be the chappie himself using a different persona. And the photograph is not necessarily of him. Sorry, don't want to sound too negative. It's just you cannot be certain of anything on computer because it is so easy to manipulate information.

Having said that I hope this person is genuine and you enjoy your conversations.

Take care

Mary

Hello Lauren and Philip

Thanks for continuing the conversation. I have been off the air just lately so have not had the opportunity to join in.

I have a deep faith in God and like Jung I don't need to believe, I know. My beliefs run very much in tandem with Lauren. I must also point out I have no angst with anyone who has a different faith or belief. All the major religions of the world preach love and tolerance and I am bemused when so many people use their belief to justify harming others in any way. It really is inconceivable.

My belief in God gives me a role model, although that is a very superficial description. There is a reason for caring for others rather than accumulating my own storehouse of goodies. Because I believe God cares for me I am able to love others. My spirituality gives me a deep connection with the world.

Mary

pipsy
Community Member
Thank you for caring Mary.  I'm pretty certain everything is kosher, however I will heed the warning.  He still hasn't asked anything about giving money, neither has she.  They don't even mention money.  I am on my guard though.  She seems interested in my job, has asked what I do.  When I mentioned about being hassled because of my accent, she just said some people derive pleasure from putting others down because that's how they communicate.  His name is Frank, hers is Janice.  There is a son Denim.  I've also heard from him.  he's told me about his school which is similar to here.  She's quite pretty. 

Doolhof
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hi Pipsy,

Once again I can certainly understand your appreciation of someone who makes you feel good about yourself. It does sound like you are being careful as to what you divulge to your new friends. It is a very sad reflection of our society when you can not trust someone to portray themselves for who they actually are.

There are so many stories on the internet where people think they are conversing with a certain person, when it is someone else altogether. Then again, people have met on the internet and ended up living together and maybe getting married.

It certainly is a shame when people ridicule others because they are different in some way. I personally like the New Zealand and South African accents. I enjoy listening to some of the cricket commentators from these countries. Actually, I like listening to the people from India talking as well.

Back to your new friends, they may all just be lonely or friendly people reaching out trying to broaden their horizons. It might be interesting to ask them what their ideas and thoughts are about Australia. Once on holidays in Asia, we met a guy from Malta, he was very surprised that we knew where Malta was.

Cheers for now from Lauren

 

 

Hi Mary,

Thanks for your contribution and thoughts regarding religion, faith and God. As I look around me at the wonders of nature, I see how amazingly everything is planned, balanced and organised, how one animal or plant compliments another and everything seems to be in its right place. That is if you exclude humans! Ha. Ha.

While working in the home for the elderly years ago, I witnessed the peace many Christians had when it came to the end of their lives. I am mentioning Christians here as I was not ever aware of people in that particular home being of a faith outside of Christianity. There were people who declared they had no faith as well.

One lady told me she really didn't want to go to heaven as she thought it would be very boring there and all the exciting and lively people would be in hell. This lady said her image of heaven was of everyone sitting around on clouds listening to angels playing harps. It sounds rather peaceful and tranquil to me! I find the sound of the harp to be soothing and almost mesmerising as I watch someone play one.

Wishing you and everyone reading this a very tranquil and relaxing week!

Cheers all from Mrs. Dools ( I sign that way as I recently signed off with my own name! Guess it doesn't really matter that much!)

 

pipsy
Community Member

Hi there.  Once again the 'pin ' has been pulled.  I heard from the U.S.A last Thursday, nothing since.  I can't be bothered with the rubbish, so I'm going to forget all about them.  People like that, who waste other people's time are not worth it.  I'm actually starting to wonder if these Americans were perhaps looking for a threesome, no way am I getting into that.  At least there was no money exchanged and they never asked for any.  Had they of, I wouldn't have even bothered talking to them.  Since the problem with the guy at work, another girl has come forward complaining of harassment.  I did hear 'on the grapevine' that, that particular guy won't be there much longer so that's a relief.  When you're dealing with the public, workers shouldn't 'bag' each other.  The client I was with last Thursday said she'd heard this guy 'bagging' me and she was quite upset.  The particular client needs two people as she's wheelchair bound.  I worked with another girl last Thursday and it was really pleasant. 

Thanks for letting me talk. 

BKYTH
Community Member
I'm sorry to hear that you have to endure such a tedious family member. I assume this person to be an atheist. They can be every bit as dogmatic and rigid as the most ardent believer.  I decided years ago that I will never allow anyone to talk down to me. That includes anyone in the psychiatric system as well. If I think a psychiatrist is superficial or judgmental with me I will tell them so and give my reasons why (they can be very egocentric and all knowing in some of their presumptions as well).                                                                                                                      I can think of many ways in which you could disarm such a person but as it is a family member that complicates the matter as I have no understanding of your family dynamics. From your description of the situation the person sounds arrogant and in possession of knowledge he cannot possibly have (knowing everything about religion). There seems to be some pathology there as well as the person takes "great pleasure in knocking your Christian beliefs".                                                 If you as him to tell you the "four noble truths" expounded by the Buddha the persons inability to do so will expose his lie as to 'knowing' everything about religion. Equally you could ask him to explain the fundamental difference between the 'Mahayana' form of Buddhism and the 'Theravada' form of Buddhism and enjoy the silence. Oh. The questions one can ask those who profess to knowing "everything" there is on any subject.           Anyone who does not allow another to have freedom of speech in expressing their beliefs forfeits the right to have such freedom in expressing theirs - Voltaire once said "I disagree with everything you just said but will defend to the death your right to say it" His claim "to the death" is not just hyperbole but it express's just how important freedom of speech is. You could substitute the word 'believe' for the word 'said' and 'say' in that quotation and that is also equally true.                                                                                                                                    I've been trying to finish this point for a few posts now but have always run out of words and it looks like it will happen again so I will do it as a separate post. Its to do with the statement that one so often hears or reads about 'suffering' from depression/anxiety or whatever. Regards one and all. Philip.

Hello Philip

I started a thread here a while ago on the 'suffering' issue. It really grates when I hear that someone is 'suffering from...'. Whatever physical, psychological or emotional difficulty a person has is always painful and hard. To me it always sounds as if the 'sufferer' is unable to get well, as in there is no cure, or is enjoying the status of 'suffering'. Of course we hurt and wish we were well. And of course we suffer in the sense we are unwell. But 'suffering' is such a victimizing word and I would hope we can do better than allow ourselves to be victims.

So I look forward to your comments.

Mary