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OCD: My Story

OCDgirl88
Community Member

Hi I'm Steph,

I have battled OCD for as long as I can remember and as a budding writer I recently had the urge to share my experience with OCD on my blog. My main reason is to help my friends and family grasp what I go through daily (as I often get told to stop my rituals like it is that easy, or yelled at for following my compulsions; even though most of them have their own mental health conditions with mental illness embedded in our genetics, they don't have OCD however. Although I haven't had the guts to share the link with them either personally or on Facebook yet, despite publishing it a few weeks ago, I'm still building up to it.

Another reason is I have always felt alone, and on bad days I often search the internet for personal OCD stories to feel a little less alone, but there's not too many that are searchable and I hope that by sharing my story I can give someone a little bit of hope as I've reached the stage where I see that 'things do get better' and to help others like myself feel a little less alone.

Finally, I'd like to start spreading more awareness about OCD. Something I hope to do more publicly in the future (if I am fortunate to be a successful writer)

 

Thanks,

Steph

 

6 Replies 6

Zeal
Community Member

Hi Steph,

I understand what living with OCD is like. I was diagnosed with OCD at age 13, but I think I may have had symptoms at least a few years earlier. I am now 22, and still live with OCD. However, it has been more manageable for about the last year and a half. My anxiety triggers are germs, illness, and vomit. I have been taking a dose of an SSRI for the last several years, which does help me. My body doesn’t produce enough serotonin, so this, along with my OCD, is why I take an antidepressant.

I agree that it is hard for others to understand why you can’t start cutting down obsessive behaviours or stop the compulsions. My family has found it difficult, but it is better now. My Dad used to get angry and frustrated, as he didn’t know how else to react, or how to help me. I feel as if many people don’t realise that OCD is a type of anxiety disorder. I am in my second year of a Psychology degree this year. In the future, I want to be able to help or counsel others who struggle with mental health issues.

It’s pretty cool that you are becoming a writer 🙂 I’m doing two creative writing subjects this semester as electives, as I also enjoy writing. I don’t do it regularly or at my leisure, however. I find that I hesitate to initiate a writing practice, due to my perfectionism and lack of concentration. Doing writing at university really helps with this.

Spreading awareness of OCD is an awesome vision. We need people like you, who are confident and determined!

I hope you are able to achieve your dreams!

Best wishes,

SM

purple_dog
Community Member

Hi Steph,

I have OCD which I try and hide from my family. They know I have certain obsessions but I try and downplay them a lot. My obsession is checking windows & locks, appliance powerpoints. However in the last few years, I have developed major issues with chicken preparation...you know salmonella contamination! Chicken for dinner at our house is a major ordeal... LOL.

My  husband does not understand and gets very annoyed and yells...what he doesn't understand is that he breaks the cycle causing unnecessary anxiety and stress.

I have learnt coping strategies and a lot of self talk to help me get through the day. These work quite well except when I am tired, and then my OCD is unbearable. I try to keep a healthy sleep schedule to minimise this, and eat a lot of chocolate which makes me feel calm!

I have discussed OCD with some close friends and everybody has some quirk bordering on OCD tendencies, just without the obsession and compulsion.

I don't know why OCD has such a social stigma and everybody relates it to being over the top in cleanliness and tidiness? Which for the record I have as well since moving a couple of years ago.. Nothing wrong with a clean and tidy home! lol

Good luck with your OCD awareness venture, the public needs more education to understand and provide support to loved ones

 

geoff
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

dear Steph, thanks for joining a rather large group of people who suffer from OCD.

I'm sure all of us would love to hear back from you.

I myself have had this illness for 55 years and it's been a long journey, painful and annoying, and I have a fraternal twin who doesn't have it, nor has he had any type of depression, all of which I am so pleased about and certainly doesn't deserve it, nor do we.

I have learnt a long time ago to hide as much as possible all my habits and rituals, and if I am caught in an awkward situation, somehow I can get out of it trying not to embarrass myself, but these compulsions are so strong, people who don't have it can never work out why we have to do them. L Geoff. x

 

Pontius
Community Member

Hello Steph,

I am so glad that you are sharing your OCD story. I completely get where you are coming from when you say that there is a distinct lack of 'Mental Health My Stories' on the internet, particularly in the realms of OCD etc. I really appreciate your reaching out to other people and letting them know that they are not alone in whatever they are going through OCD-wise. I do a bit of writing too, but I wish that I had your courage to put something out there like that.

You are an inspiration, and I can't thank you enough.

Pontius

My condition is different, even I remember when turning off something at that very moment, as soon as Iam outside my house, I question myself, self doubt, ask my family if they have seen me turning off. either I have to return to check that light or stove or heater or the window or the door. Sometimes my husband scolds me that do not go back to check again.and if I don't double check my whole day I will be thinking about that until I return home with the same thought n more anxious.

Yeah, Flyingfox, I kind of understand that, except for me it is signs and stuff. Like, if I don't think I know exactly what a sign said I really feel like I need to check it to know for sure, because if I don't I might never know what it said. That thought is just unbearable for me so whenever I can I go back and read whatever it was. Annoying, isn't it, having to go back and check things even if you are pretty sure they are off or you know they're not important etc.

Keep well,

Pontius