A month ago I was made redundant from state government and ever since then I have been a complete mess. I have suffered from anxiety from a young age and so did my mother. The redundancy experience was so demoralizing and completely horrible that I just want to block it out from my memory. Since the redundancy, I can do nothing but cry, shake, panic. I feel so incapable of being in control every again. I am well qualified but feel useless at everything even though people tell me that I am good at what I do. I am so scared ALL the time. I think that I will NEVER get a job again, I am too old (51). No one will want me. I have chosen to go back to Uni again as it is my 'safe place'. The trouble is I just think about who will give me a job when I finish? Did I choose the right degree? What is the point? Should I just walk in front of a bus. I have been to a doctor and taking medication for anxiety. It has stopped the physical panic reactions but not the dreadfully negative thoughts.
I have never had trouble getting a job before, but now I feel like there is no hope. Has anyone else felt like this? I keep getting told I am very employable and that the age thing is just in my mind.
Forgive my brevity but.............bugger ! Bloody State Government.
I'm 50 and lost work in 1997. Since then I've composed for a big band and my wife takes all the legal and managing responsibilities. If you think a uni course will be good for you then do it. Jobs are changing all the time. Only a small % of today's jobs will be around when someone who is in Kindy today, 2013, will eventually leave in Yr 12 in 2025. Your attitude would be more important and you sound very balanced. Your track record of getting work is good - no trouble.
I tried the standing in front of a bus once and it took so long for the Night Bus to come around the blind corner that I gave up and went home to have a cup of tea. It seems you need some support and a bit of TLC. Are you living on your own ? Family near by ? Friendly area ?
That uni you are applying for will have a big Careers Dept. You could go and do an aptitude test and get an amazing amount of info on courser/jobs/prospects without being put on the spot. It might even be the case that you change you course preference. I think you owe it to yourself and skills to get some heads up advice.
PS "No one will want me". That's possible. But you might to try first.
Great advice from David there.
You seem to be lacking confidence. As you spend more time at uni this feeling will pass. You will achieve great things at school and this sense of achievement will restore your confidence. Immerse yourself in the course, and as you learn you will gradually see opportunities for how you can use what you've learned.
All in time. Relax, trust in yourself, and be patient. All in time.
The ONLY path to success is through failure. Even the ones that seem to get it first go failed at some point previously, possibly in private, and probably several times. We are not perfect, and the stigma around making mistakes has gotta go. We can't function under such pressure. If anyone ostracises you for making a mistake, apologise for being human and promise to summon Superman next time they need something done. Oh, oops, I forgot, even superman makes mistakes. LOL