dear StephJade, it's great to have you join us on a very personal manner.
You are brave to disclose what has happened with yourself, but it means that you must trust all of us and feel comfortable in doing so, so that's a great start.
What your psychologist has said I believe is so true, mind you I am no professional at all, but just like most of us have been through the wringers, down to hell and back several times, with so many terrible experiences along the way.
I can well and truly understand why it all started when you were in HSC, because the pressure is extraordinary too much, and always has been.
Because we always tend to believe in comparing what we have done to what our friends have done, and think that they are so much better, then this obviously pushes us into being anxious upset or even depressed, then this the beginning of trouble, so basically another outcome is that our self esteem hits a wall, which can lead to self medicating or punishing ourselves, which is what unfortunately has happened for you.
It only stands to reason why we do it, it seems to just occur naturally or more so fall into it.
So at the moment you have no self esteem, so you have to try and build it up again, but there's a problem here, because how we do it is to keep comparing how we do it as against to how our friends would do it or what they have achieved, so this is where you have to forget about all of this, because somebody's self-esteem can never be put on a par with yours, so they are different, and just because they boost about it, is just the same as they may have a porsche and you have a falcon,so what, their insurance premium is higher, their service to the car is also higher, so you know what I am getting at.
I must say that Jacko and Hideaway have added to this and said some good points, and there is more we can discuss.
Hope that you can reply back to us. Geoff.
