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Anxiety

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Chris_B Forums etiquette: give support to receive support
  • replies: 0

Hi everyone, particularly any new members who may be reading. From time to time, we get contacted by members who are unhappy that they haven’t received a lot of replies to their posts. Our community champions work very hard to make sure that all newb... View more

Hi everyone, particularly any new members who may be reading. From time to time, we get contacted by members who are unhappy that they haven’t received a lot of replies to their posts. Our community champions work very hard to make sure that all newbies are welcomed when they first post, and we understand that it’s a big step to post for the first time on a forum like this, especially if you aren’t feeling great. It’s important to remember, though, that these forums are a community of real people, just like you, not a one-on-one support environment like going to see your psychologist. To get the best out of being here, one of the best tips we can offer is give support to receive support. Being a good community member means: participating in different threads (not just your own), replying to people who have taken the time to reply to you (even if it’s just to say thank you), and... posting words of emotional support and encouragement when you see others who are hurting and reaching out. You don’t have to feel obliged to solve the problems of others: that’s not what we’re here for. But you can offer empathy and what you’ve learned from your own life experiences, even if it’s just a line or two, eg. “I don't know what to say, but I want to give you my support and tell you I care about what is happening to you and hope life will get better soon.” Try to develop an interest in the journeys of others here on the forums. You may be surprised at how good being an active, caring member here can make you feel. For those of you who have had good experiences giving support here on the forums, please post in this thread here and let us know how it has helped you on your journey.

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AndreLB Anxiety Support Group
  • replies: 1

Hi everyone! I'm new to Beyond Blue and happy to meet everyone! I've dealing with anxiety for a large part of my life and I wanted to ask if anyone knows of any Australian based anxiety support groups? Something similar to alcoholics anonyms perhaps.... View more

Hi everyone! I'm new to Beyond Blue and happy to meet everyone! I've dealing with anxiety for a large part of my life and I wanted to ask if anyone knows of any Australian based anxiety support groups? Something similar to alcoholics anonyms perhaps. Any help is much appreciated! Thank you

JEF15 OCD on holidays
  • replies: 1

HiMy OCD was very bad when I was younger, but it's usually pretty well managed these days. Except when I go on holidays. I hate holidays, because I'm staying in a hotel/apartment/villa etc and everything just grosses me out. My children lay and roll ... View more

HiMy OCD was very bad when I was younger, but it's usually pretty well managed these days. Except when I go on holidays. I hate holidays, because I'm staying in a hotel/apartment/villa etc and everything just grosses me out. My children lay and roll all over the carpet and I FREAK! I can't shower cause it's absolute torture. I can't live out of a suitcase cause I can't put dirty clothes mixed in with my clean clothes. It's just not much fun, its not relaxing, as holidays are meant to be. I want to take holidays cause my children love it, so I do it. But really, I just wanna be home in my comforts. Anyone else like this?

Lost_puppy Missing home
  • replies: 1

I single mum...recently moved back to a place to be closer to my oldest kids & family however I'm finding it hard to find a home here & missing my old home terribly I gave up my much loved pets & happy place to come back for my kids & I should be the... View more

I single mum...recently moved back to a place to be closer to my oldest kids & family however I'm finding it hard to find a home here & missing my old home terribly I gave up my much loved pets & happy place to come back for my kids & I should be the happiest & proud of this achievement but I'm full of anxiety no family support at all & missing my old life greatly . When I first got here I was the best version of myself I've ever bean at peace & very happy person now I'm waking up every morning with anxiety ...

EKS78 New job anxiety
  • replies: 1

I received a redundancy last year and I have been unable to stick with any job since more than a couple of days. The second day I seem to fall into a deep anxiety depression and just cannot continue with the job. I’m having full panic attacks with ti... View more

I received a redundancy last year and I have been unable to stick with any job since more than a couple of days. The second day I seem to fall into a deep anxiety depression and just cannot continue with the job. I’m having full panic attacks with tingly arms and hot and cold down my arms and I just can’t control it. I just don’t know what’s going on. I chuck it in and feel like an idiot for a while because the job was fine then I go again and the same thing happens no matter how I try. I start a new job Monday and I’m terrified I’ll stuff it up. The feeling that I get is a real roller coaster of trying to keep my emotions on track. One sec I’m excited and think I can do this the next I think maybe I should call them and cancel as there’s no way I can do it. I’ve talked to a counselor who doesn’t understand. She thinks I’m hung up over the redundancy but I’m not it was great. I was at my job a long time so I was comfortable with my anxiety there. I just don’t know please help

AT_1 Constantly aware of breathing and hot air.
  • replies: 1

For the last 2 years i have been going through near constant medical episodes related to my health. I feel like I've not had a break and I'm so tired. This year i was hoping that, with all of my health problems over and/or dealt with (chronic constip... View more

For the last 2 years i have been going through near constant medical episodes related to my health. I feel like I've not had a break and I'm so tired. This year i was hoping that, with all of my health problems over and/or dealt with (chronic constipation, prediabetes, ringing in ears, eye floaters, ADHD diagnosis, and more) i could finally move on and live my life again. I do everything the doctors tell me and have had noticed improvements in my health prior to last a few days ago. But last week i for some reason woke up and noticed some hot air in my room, and it took me turning the AC on and standing near it to get a breath of "fresh" air. Ever since then I've had nothing but a growing, and now a complete, awareness of my breathing and how hot the air is. Breathing is now entirely mechanical and i can't breathe without make an effort to. I feel light headed, my chest is tight, I have a pounding headache and nothing distracts me anymore. All i think about is that the air is hot and not fit to breathe but i also have to breathe. I can't work anymore and i have so many other appointments i've made that i have to keep but now can't keep. Anything i do physically causes me to overheat and become exhausted, if I'm not doing anything its like torture noticing how much im breathing. I can't sleep but im so tired. This is so painful, it feels like a never ending panic attack. Has anyone else experienced this? how do you fix it? please help.

stell_a178 I can’t talk to men
  • replies: 7

Since I (20F) can remember I have had a hard time talking to men. I’m also very pale, so whenever I try and talk to men my face goes bright red. I don’t really know why, I’m a queer woman. Even at work when I am serving men, my face goes red. It’s su... View more

Since I (20F) can remember I have had a hard time talking to men. I’m also very pale, so whenever I try and talk to men my face goes bright red. I don’t really know why, I’m a queer woman. Even at work when I am serving men, my face goes red. It’s super embarrassing. Everyone tends to think it’s because I am attracted to them and so I turn red. But that’s never the case. I just find it really difficult to come up with conversation starters with men, but with women I don’t have to even think about it.i don’t know what to do about this because it’s really bugging me. My coworkers boyfriend came into work and immediately my face went red and I got quiet. I didn’t know how to interact with him. He was also with two other men of similar age to me. I just froze. I just feel more comfortable around feminine energy. Any tips or advice?

sera Really want to start dating
  • replies: 16

Hello BB people, I'm a 40 yr old guy who has been diagnosed with social phobia, mood disorder and depression. I see a psychiatrist who is mostly helpful and take medication which also helps. I find that I'm lonely and want to start dating regularly s... View more

Hello BB people, I'm a 40 yr old guy who has been diagnosed with social phobia, mood disorder and depression. I see a psychiatrist who is mostly helpful and take medication which also helps. I find that I'm lonely and want to start dating regularly so I can build up confidence, experience and feel better about my value as a partner. I have had one relationship for 4 years, but it finished badly - my fault - and only came about through a friend setting us up. I've never asked a girl to go out and girls who I like usually already have boyfriends and are too young for me, i.e. more than 10 years. I feel inexperienced as many people my age are married or divorced, have a career and kids. I wish I could go back and be more adventurous in my 20s and ask girls out, but of course, I can't. I've done CBT, but need to take solid action outside therapy, that's my issue. If I had a group of friends - only 1 person I see apart from parents who consider a friend - there would be many opportunities to socialise, meet girls, socially lubricate. I do feel desperate at times because I don't do anything about it and it will not change if I don't. I tried internet dating, sent lot of messages, but didn't hear back or have dates. Thanks for listening. Sera (guy, even though may sound like girl)

ScooterCat Dealing with regrets
  • replies: 5

It sucks. I missed out on a lot of opportunities in high school. I never talked to anyone, made friends or hung out with anyone. I felt everyone hated me and didn’t want me around. I kept isolating myself and staying silent. Now that my teenage years... View more

It sucks. I missed out on a lot of opportunities in high school. I never talked to anyone, made friends or hung out with anyone. I felt everyone hated me and didn’t want me around. I kept isolating myself and staying silent. Now that my teenage years are over, I’ve slowly come to the realisation that no one actually hated me or didn’t want me around. It was all just anxiety in my head. I hurt a lot of people back in high school. So many people kept coming up to me and saying hi, but all I did was ignore them and said nothing. I just wish I could do something to turn this all around. I wish I could talk to all those people and say something back to them. I wish I knew people didn’t hate me at all.

justcant Bad anxiety day - disgusted with myself.
  • replies: 6

Hi everyone, I’ve had a really bad day with my driving anxiety. My uncle passed away last Friday and I was going to take the opportunity to go today and spend the day with my aunty. I had food and other things to bring her. She lives a bit far away, ... View more

Hi everyone, I’ve had a really bad day with my driving anxiety. My uncle passed away last Friday and I was going to take the opportunity to go today and spend the day with my aunty. I had food and other things to bring her. She lives a bit far away, way off my “comfort roads” and I was scared about it last night and this morning but I got up and got everything ready and set off regardless. I made it almost half way there and the anxiety kicked in big time and it was long before it was a full blown panic attack. I tried stopping places to calm down and continue on but I just couldn’t do it. I was terrified and exhausted and it just wasn’t safe. I felt physically sick. I managed to drive home on some back roads very slowly. My next therapist appointment isn’t until the 14th of February. And what’s worse is that my uncle’s funeral is Friday and my whole family are going together. And I know this sounds so contradictory but as much anxiety as I get, I hate it even more when someone else is driving and I’m not in control. And driving myself is really not an option as it’s so far away and I just can’t miss this. I know how selfish I sound. I feel so awful and I don’t know what to do. I feel shattered, stupid and completely disgusted with myself. Thank you for reading.Sarah.

Annas1 Anxiety as a response to emotional pain
  • replies: 2

Hello fellow travellers, I'm experiencing another anxiety spike at the moment - activated nervous system, significant sleep difficulty, fear of being seen in this state and consequent low mood - and while I understand the relevant trigger there is li... View more

Hello fellow travellers, I'm experiencing another anxiety spike at the moment - activated nervous system, significant sleep difficulty, fear of being seen in this state and consequent low mood - and while I understand the relevant trigger there is little I can do to change the situation. Or at least this is how it feels. After considerable experience unpacking the deeper cause for my anxiety response I now recognise that I have an overriding habit of 'running' from my feelings of pain, fear and sadness. I think this defensive psychological pattern is well understood by clinicians and it makes a lot of sense to me intellectually. My task now is to face and feel into the original sadness/pain/fear and let it run its course - but of course this doesn't feel safe and my body has practiced heading off in other directions - any direction! - but feel that sadness and pain. So, here I am, adrift on a cocktail of distress, exhaustion, shame and slow panic, knowing that the only way round it is actually through it, but unable to make any forward motion. Marooned. I have long used the evokation of films to get my tears and pain flowing, and I tried this yesterday without the release I sought. This can make me feel I've doubly failed ironically. I know this thought is not helpful (nor true) so I dismiss that silly critic and try to love myself along the way. I will meet with my psychotherapist next week and hope I have the courage to go deep with him and access/release/experience the griefs I keep bundled up for fear of disintegrating and alienating myself. In the meantime I'm expecting family to stay, good people with whom I will try to be open and gentle and not hide myself too much. It is probably my son's wellbeing I'm most concerned about. How hard it must be for him to see me struggle so much to be 'normal', to be happy, to live my life in forward motion. My self-development is now for his future as much as for my own. When I'm more free and available to myself I will be more free and available with him. Something all good relationships are made from. So I'm very weary, less desperate than in the past, but trepidatious about how I can get myself safely from here to there, the place where I can set down my bundle and let it all flow. Thoughts and reflections very welcome. Annas