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Chris_B Forums etiquette: give support to receive support
  • replies: 0

Hi everyone, particularly any new members who may be reading. From time to time, we get contacted by members who are unhappy that they haven’t received a lot of replies to their posts. Our community champions work very hard to make sure that all newb... View more

Hi everyone, particularly any new members who may be reading. From time to time, we get contacted by members who are unhappy that they haven’t received a lot of replies to their posts. Our community champions work very hard to make sure that all newbies are welcomed when they first post, and we understand that it’s a big step to post for the first time on a forum like this, especially if you aren’t feeling great. It’s important to remember, though, that these forums are a community of real people, just like you, not a one-on-one support environment like going to see your psychologist. To get the best out of being here, one of the best tips we can offer is give support to receive support. Being a good community member means: participating in different threads (not just your own), replying to people who have taken the time to reply to you (even if it’s just to say thank you), and... posting words of emotional support and encouragement when you see others who are hurting and reaching out. You don’t have to feel obliged to solve the problems of others: that’s not what we’re here for. But you can offer empathy and what you’ve learned from your own life experiences, even if it’s just a line or two, eg. “I don't know what to say, but I want to give you my support and tell you I care about what is happening to you and hope life will get better soon.” Try to develop an interest in the journeys of others here on the forums. You may be surprised at how good being an active, caring member here can make you feel. For those of you who have had good experiences giving support here on the forums, please post in this thread here and let us know how it has helped you on your journey.

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Tomyy I can’t get over my girlfriend and it’s been years
  • replies: 4

It’s been a couple years since I’ve broken up with my girlfriend. Till this day I can’t get over her , I’ve tried hanging with friends , I’ve tried talking to over girls . I’m at breaking point , she’s the only person Ive ever gotten to know so deep ... View more

It’s been a couple years since I’ve broken up with my girlfriend. Till this day I can’t get over her , I’ve tried hanging with friends , I’ve tried talking to over girls . I’m at breaking point , she’s the only person Ive ever gotten to know so deep and I can’t get over her, I can’t eat properly and have lost weight

aliceUK Unable to retrieve school reports for ADHD assessment
  • replies: 2

Hi there, I’m hoping to have an assessment for ADHD. I’m 28 years old, my older brother has a diagnosis of Asperger’s and I’m pretty sure that father is somewhere on the spectrum (undiagnosed) I migrated to Australia from UK and it’s difficult to ret... View more

Hi there, I’m hoping to have an assessment for ADHD. I’m 28 years old, my older brother has a diagnosis of Asperger’s and I’m pretty sure that father is somewhere on the spectrum (undiagnosed) I migrated to Australia from UK and it’s difficult to retrieve my school reports, my father moved out of home when I was young and I have an estranged relationship with my mother so she won’t have archived my school reports. If I can’t access them through the school (I’m still waiting for a response) will I be able to have the assessment take place purely on my symptoms now and having my other family members confirm my symptoms when I was in school? I’m really struggling at the moment with everything in my day to day life and I’ll be so sad if I can’t have my assessment because of my reports. I understand the requirement to have symptoms showing prior to be an adult, but these documents aren’t always accessible unfortunately.

crazycatlover77 Anxiety over work re sick leave
  • replies: 4

Hi all, I'm really struggling with work. I have chronic illnesses which cause constant pain and part of treatment is an immune suppressing medication. I'm 25 and I have had anxiety and depression in connection with the chronic illness for many years.... View more

Hi all, I'm really struggling with work. I have chronic illnesses which cause constant pain and part of treatment is an immune suppressing medication. I'm 25 and I have had anxiety and depression in connection with the chronic illness for many years. I have only recently won a permanent position in my workplace 10 months ago. Due to my chronic illnesses and the immune suppressing meds, I have a fairly significant amount of time off work sick (think 35 ish days/rolling 12 months). My employer has engaged HR and placed me on an attendance plan. They state it is due to the fact I am unable to accrue personal leave and have ended up needing unpaid sick leave (they don't allow me to use annual leave when I run out of personal). I have always provided medical certificates and letters from medical profs. Work state they "want me to be present in the workplace as much as possible" and have mentioned concerns about my finances. The pressure not to take sick leave is crushing me; there are days I can scarcely manage to get out of bed for pain and other symptoms as well as being prone to catching things due to being immunocompromised. Every time I can't go to work I'm terrified to tell them. When my boss answers the phone and I say my name, I can hear the change in tone; oh, it's you, *again*. It's causing significant guilt, fear and anxiety. Their 'management' has caused me escalating anxiety as I am constantly in fear of losing my job; it feels like they're building a case against me. Add to this I have been moved to new work and gone from high performing to not meeting expectations and am now required to work with people who are experiencing FDV. It's become a perfect storm of anxiety/depression that is getting serious. It's been worse the last few weeks as I caught COVID-19 for the first time. I've been bedridden for two weeks and the doctor has just requested I rest another week before returning to normal activities. I've gone straight from fearing I could die to fearing I will lose my job. I feel so guilty for how long it's taking to recover. I'm really lost. I'm trying to get a mental health care plan but I'm not sure I can afford the gap to see a psychologist and none in my area bulk bill. Any advice or info appreciated. Thanks,Catlover

needssleep How do I work?
  • replies: 5

Hi so I am 18 and I guess that’s kinda the start of adulthood and everyone my age is getting jobs and going to parties and doing all of the adult things but I still feel like I haven’t grown out of being a child yet, I still have teddies and still ha... View more

Hi so I am 18 and I guess that’s kinda the start of adulthood and everyone my age is getting jobs and going to parties and doing all of the adult things but I still feel like I haven’t grown out of being a child yet, I still have teddies and still have a colour full bedroom and still think that seggs is gross. So I don’t understand what is wrong with me. I have tried getting a job and went to a coffee making class but we hadn’t even started making coffee before I throw up, I went for an interview for Woolworths and froze. It feels like I am never going to get a job because just going outside is a big deal for me. I am scared because if I don’t get a job people will look down on me and I will just have to live off my parents. I thought that maybe getting a job in childcare might help because being around children tends to soothe my anxiety because I am thinking about what they need and not think about my anxiety but I went to a childcare centre for a interview for a traineeship and they didn’t even call be back. Anyway it’s 12 at night and I have an interview for volunteering for an op shop tomorrow and I can’t get too sleep because I am scared, I really want to volunteer because I need to gain people skills if I am going to get a job so yeah.I don’t understand why you need to have a job to be a functioning person in society but my dad says it’s about paying your part or something. It doesn’t make sense that you need to have a job to live, if I didn’t have my parents I probably wouldn’t be here (as in alive because I wouldn’t have money to live) I am scared I just really don’t want to disappoint anyone.

Soozzelu feeling unsafe
  • replies: 5

Hope to hear from you.I'm currently house-minding in a different state and not feeling safe with my surroundings. My thoughts and emotions are going through the roof with nervousness and anxiety. I keep thinking about intruders. Is there anyone else ... View more

Hope to hear from you.I'm currently house-minding in a different state and not feeling safe with my surroundings. My thoughts and emotions are going through the roof with nervousness and anxiety. I keep thinking about intruders. Is there anyone else that feels this too and what strategies work for you?

byekt Constant dizziness/ lightheadedness
  • replies: 2

Hi everyone, I have been suffering from anxiety for years but as of the last 7 months I find myself constantly dizzy & lightheaded, I might not even be anxious but the sensation never leaves, I have went to numerous doctors appointments and have foun... View more

Hi everyone, I have been suffering from anxiety for years but as of the last 7 months I find myself constantly dizzy & lightheaded, I might not even be anxious but the sensation never leaves, I have went to numerous doctors appointments and have found nothing wrong medically and been told it’s likely anxiety. Does anyone else ever have this constant feeling of being dizzy/ lightheaded? regards

Farah 1990 Asbestos anxiety
  • replies: 9

Hi everyone, I have recently been aware of asbestos and its danger. I bought an old house built in the 70s and ripped off the vinyl sheet that was on top of the tile vinyl in the kitchen area with no mask or protection as I had absolutely no idea tha... View more

Hi everyone, I have recently been aware of asbestos and its danger. I bought an old house built in the 70s and ripped off the vinyl sheet that was on top of the tile vinyl in the kitchen area with no mask or protection as I had absolutely no idea that this could be dangerous. Since I started knowing about asbestos, my anxiety is hitting the roof, I keep thinking that i have inhaled the fibres and I am going to die i wake up anxious I sleep anxious, I can't enjoy or do anything in my life without asbestos being the center of my focus. There is no way to test the sheets as I threw them long time ago. I am just sitting there worrying that I have put my health and my kids health in danger. Anyone with similar stories or with positive vibes, I do need them

Guest_1584 Life anxiety , do you believe in luck, bad luck, or some dealt certain hands ?
  • replies: 14

Hi to all , and if you feel inclined l'd really like to hear any and all thoughts, beliefs, experiences whatever, observations,so please feel free. Do you believe in luck , or bad luck , or that we may just be dealt a certain hand in life. ? Do you b... View more

Hi to all , and if you feel inclined l'd really like to hear any and all thoughts, beliefs, experiences whatever, observations,so please feel free. Do you believe in luck , or bad luck , or that we may just be dealt a certain hand in life. ? Do you believe we do things do things to bring good luck or invite bad luck ? Or that maybe there are things we can do to invite good luck in life ? Why , is it some people can do no wrong , they have so much and so much comes to them yet they very often aren't even very nice people, often down right self a/h's, or full of dirty tricks, yet things just keep on coming to them no matter what they do? Yet others you know for fact are some of the nicest people you'd find anywhere, or they try so hard , or would happily give others the shirt of their back , or always be there for a friend , maybe very thoughtful and considerate , yet nothing goes right ? But if there might be anyone that deserves whatever good life could bring their way, it would be them . You must've noticed this stuff right through life or gone through it all yourself , or watched the worst people you know have things just fall into their lap while no matter what someone else does all they seem to cop is shyt . Why does it all happen the way that it does and to the people that it does ? Do you believe in Karma , paybacks in life, or life rewarding us , or what goes around comes around ? rx

sparrowhawk Life changes
  • replies: 23

Hi everyone. I have recently been diagnosed with anorexia, and am in recovery. I'd say I've had disordered eating for the past two years but only acknowledged it last year. As part of my recovery I'm assessing for myself my life circumstances and can... View more

Hi everyone. I have recently been diagnosed with anorexia, and am in recovery. I'd say I've had disordered eating for the past two years but only acknowledged it last year. As part of my recovery I'm assessing for myself my life circumstances and can see that the current situation I'm living in (a religious community) contributes to the disordered eating. I've been living here for a number of years. Mealtimes are had together, we have a cooking roster so I can't always plan my own foods, and the people I live with often trigger me with comments which are well-intended but not always helpful. There are lots of demands and expectations living this life, I've often fallen short, and at times have been subject to gaslighting and even to bullying - which in part triggered the disordered eating. I don't have a lot of energy at the moment and can't do a lot, and I sense that really leads to some resentment in others. All of this makes me very anxious and reluctant to be around people. I have thought a lot about returning home to my parents, who have been very supportive. I feel a lot of calm, peace, excitement and joy at going home and even at starting with nothing - feelings I haven't had in a long time. At the same time, I have a lot of guilt, because my community has given me a lot of support and care and I know they want me to be healthy. I feel sometimes like I "owe" it to them to stay, because of how much they've invested in me, which I know is problematic because that sense of obligation compromises free choice. Leaving would mean leaving literally everything - I would have no job, no money, nothing - but that doesn't really make me scared as much as the thought of being a disappointment. I know my recovery could really progress and things might get better, but this whole journey of illness has shown me that perhaps I am really not able to live this life and that it's not suitable for me anymore. There will be challenges everywhere, and I'm really holding on to the peace and joy I feel - but at the same time, I can't shake that sense of guilt. It's making me anxious and I don't want to be. Would love any advice or guidance as to how to make sense of what I'm feeling.

movingkids My new job and child's anxiety
  • replies: 6

Hi all wanting help from people who suffer with anxiety. My child has it and self harms. I have got a new job in a capital city which means we would have to leave the country town and my child will also need to start a new school. I know anxiety stop... View more

Hi all wanting help from people who suffer with anxiety. My child has it and self harms. I have got a new job in a capital city which means we would have to leave the country town and my child will also need to start a new school. I know anxiety stops people doing stuff. But am I going to do more damage than good making them move. Any help would be great 13 years old. They say they can't handle the city we tried a couple of weeks they never came out of the bedroom. Went out and they had a panic attack. Please help me