Worried about myself and my life

[issy93]

Hello,

Lately I have been having worried thoughts. I have been really mentally exhausted lately, from studying, from work. I ended up taking today off work to rest. Recently my boyfriend told me I am really stressed out and I realised I just needed to take a rest and pay more attention to how my body is feeling. Instead of continuing the stressful cycle of work then more study etc. So I forced myself to take the day off work. It is not the first time I've taken days off work like this.

Anyway, I am studying a health degree by the way, and I keep thinking that with the mental state I am in now, how am I going to be a good health professional in the future? If I am mentally exhausted and keep needing to have days off work to feel better? Because you can't do that as a health professional especially when you have patients that want to see you at work for an illness for example. I am really doubting myself. Is this the right career for me? Is it too big of a role for me to be a health professional, maybe I should choose an easier career? Because I can't handle a lot of stress and workload. I'm just so worried about my future. 

And in any job really, how am I going to be a good worker if I dread going to work and keep wishing for a day off to not stress. I feel like I'm going to have to sort out my mental health state. 

By the way, I should share that I have emetophobia. In the past it was worse but it really shook me. It started when I was diagnosed with gastritis. At that time I literally found it hard to leave the house and take public transport or go to university classes because of the fear of being sick. Ever since then I've had bad anxiety. And I'm thinking depression could be in the picture too.

Thank you so much for reading and replying.

[Snoman]

Hi Issy,

First, if you think you may have depression, and that sounds highly probable, then I think you should go see your GP and get their opinion.

Second, as you know, mental illness does not discriminate.  That means doctors, nurses, psychologists and other people in health can and do experience mental illness.  It doesn't mean they, or you, have to give up being in health.  On the contrary, I think it helps you become a more empathetic and understanding practitioner.

The key is to manage the condition properly.  You have to work extra hard dealing with your condition as well as studying.  And then you will be this awesome person with a degree and some valuable life experiences where you can help people that deeply need to be understood.

A few years ago, I worked in an job recognised for being high stress.  I coped very well for many years.  Lots of things happened, I am unemployed and recovering from severe depression.  I was unable to apply for work, had stuffed up memory, couldn't concentrate, and anxiety was easily triggered.  Definitely unable to work in my previous roles.  Now, with my depression almost completely in remission, those issues are so minor, I believe I could take on my old work.  Perhaps I would struggle a bit for a month or two, but I could do it.

With the right treatment I can't see why you wouldn't get on top of your condition too.  It doesn't have to impact your ability to work in your chose career.

Sno