Will I be depressed my whole life?

[BudC]

I've been feeling miserable most of the time since I started high school in 2012, though I'm not sure exactly when I was diagnosed with depression, just that it was at least a few years ago. Since then I've been to at least 4 different psychologists and to 2 different psychiatrists, and I've tried multiple online helplines, and nothing has improved.

I'm starting to think maybe I just have to accept the fact that I'm going to be feeling sad for the majority of my time on this Earth, and I don't see any way out. What do I do to escape? Is there something I'm doing wrong, some special thing I have to do that I'm not doing? Or am I just stuck being depressed until I die? Depression is supposed to be a curable disease that's over in 4 to 8 months and that figure really disheartens me as this is the 60-somethingth month of it.

Is there anyone here who has been depressed for several years? If so, how did you get out of it, or are you still depressed now? Does anyone know what I should do?

Just as some background, I am 18 years old, I'm in a town in rural New South Wales, and there are a few things that make me depressed. One is that I have been constantly fighting verbally and physically with my brothers pretty much since I was born, and that has worsened severely in the last 5 or 6 years. Another is that I can't stop thinking about the world's problems, especially the 48 billion animals suffering in factory farms, and the animals that will lose their homes and lives to the biggest climate disaster in 250 million years, and I'm sick of living in a world that's a mostly bad place, where most lifeforms are unsafe and unhappy. And also I am a very weird person, and although I haven't been bullied for 4 years, I don't have much of a social life outside of school lunch and recess and feel alone, isolated and like I don't belong most of the time. There are other minor contributors too but those are the main things that tend to repeat in my head, and tend to get me down a lot of the time.

Anyway, sorry for rambling on, I just want to know if anyone can help? Is there anyone who has been depressed for this long? Is there any way out?

[white knight]

Hi Bud, welcome

I might help

Ive had depression since12yo and I'm 61yo. Depression is more likely lifelong that short term.

With medication suitable for you it can be minimalised and you can lead a near normal life.

Therapy would be good for you because when my anxiety peaked at 31yo my therapist identified that my thoughts were unrealistic and not productive. My anger then about the world, the animal cruelty, waste, crowds, financial struggles etc were effecting me. Also fear, fear conflicts with others, that the tax man would knock on my door etc. All unrealistic.

I was reprogrammed to accept that things out of my control were not worth my heartache worrying. That waste problem?...to take a garbage bag around my small rural town picking up plastic bottles helped clean up the environment and made me feel good.

Other issues...crowds. I learned to limit my shopping in arcades to 20 minutes, too many vans in a caravan park? Do a u-turn and try another, even stop on the side of a road rather than being surrounded.

I take an interest in politics now. I follow the Korean conflict but its all about perspective. If its out of my control why gain ulcers?

In terms of your siblings you might consider once you are financially able, to move out and distance yourself. Ever thought of joining the armed forces?

A few threads Ive written below will help. Use google

Topic: worry worry worry- beyondblue

Topic: depression, a ship on the high seas- beyondblue

Topic: be radical- beyondblue

Topic: depression and sensitivity, a connection?- beyondblue

Topic: so what are their mental illnesses?- beyondblue

Topic: bullying- beyondblue

Cheers. Post anytime.

Tony WK

[romantic_thi3f]

Hi BudC,

Welcome to the forums and thanks for reaching out.

I'm really sorry that you're having a tough time and it sounds like this has been something you've dealing with for a while.

For now I'm going to skip the hoo-ha about seeing someone else and answer your questions -

I was diagnosed with depression when I was about 13, although I remember having depressive and suicidal thoughts when I was about 11. So I've had it for a long time.

I'm not sure where you read that depression is a curable disease and is over in 4-8 months so I just want to fact check you there. Depression doesn't have a 'cure'. Some people will have depression all their lives. We can never fully 'get rid of it'.

Having said all that though, just because it's not curable doesn't mean it's going to be or feel this way for this long. I have had depression for a long time but that doesn't mean I've been incredibly sad for that entire time. There may not be a cure, but there's still a lot of therapies and things that can help ease it so that it's less intense. People who have depression can still live normal lives and experience joy, laughter and do all the things - work, study, have kids, get married, skydive. There's no limit. It doesn't have to define you.

It sounds like the biggest things making you depressed right now is fighting with your brothers, not having a big social life, and worrying about animals and climate change. So out of these 4 things, 2 of them can be changed - being a little less isolated, and not fighting with your brothers. The other 2 I'm afraid will most likely always be around, but it doesn't mean it has to take up so much room in your head.

You mentioned that you were 18 and in school; when will you graduate? Do you think you'll be getting your own place? I ask this because getting some distance from your brothers can knock at least one thing off your list.

I do have other thoughts on the rest but don't want to overwhelm you 😛 So maybe let us know what you're thinking and we can go from there.