Please help me work out whats wrong with me

[Dyl]

Hey friends, I am desperate for help, here's my story;I'm 18 years old and have suffered from anxiety for about 4 years and have been taking medication daily to tackle it.My anxiety is seriosuly unusual, I do get the common symptoms, worrying about relationships etc, But my most serious problem is I have the most unusual fears, things like thinking of someone trying to tear a phonebook in half, large things that are not heavy or small things that are, I can't even describe this, The feeling I get is like a severe version of fear of height. I've asked my psychologist about it, and he shrugged it off (Am now getting a new psych this week). But I'm desperate guys, please, if you have any idea of what or why I am suffering from this?Though I feel that the medication has mildly helped me, I can tell that it's still hitting me.Recently I was quite ill with glandular fever and this made my anxiety much worse. Months later I was starting to recover from this however as a result, with a lack of cooperation from my school, I had to drop out of year 12.Things were starting to look up about a month later, however I was then hospitalized with Salmonella poisoning and extremely ill for a few days.Two weeks later I'm home and physically recovering. Though my anxiety has taken a turn for the worse. I havn't eaten in days because all I eat I throw up. Thinking about almost anything negative makes my heart beat quickly and I feel sick. Often I can't calm down and feel forced to take medication.I can't sleep without sleeping medication and have lost over 10 kg, If my new psych doesn't know what it is, I feel that I'm only going to get worse.Please guys, does anyone know anything that may be helpful?

[gettingbetter]

Hey Dyl, sounds like you have def been thru the wars. Good thing you are getting a new psych cos theres nothing worse than the ones that wont listen to u. No matter how weird you think your fear or thoguht is, the way of dealing with it is similar, its about giving u tools to battle intrusive or unwanted thoughts, and a good psych will be able to help you apply this. With your current bout of feeling sick, I know from experience that food poisoning is really horrible and can leave you feeling off for a bit. Plus the glandular fever cant have helped. That said, you should go back to your GP and talk to him or her abhout it, because you shouldn't be using meds to makle you sleep unless they're prescribed. 

[AGrace]

HI Dyl,

Just wanted to check in and see how you are travelling? Have you been to see your new Psychologist yet? How did you find him/her? Were you able to discuss your feeling of fear?

The one thing I've learnt over these years is that I have to remind myself that feelings aren't fact. Feelings can be useful as they serve the purpose of allowing us to distinguish pleasure from pain, however we can't rely on them to present the absolute truth. 

Quite often our natural response to a negative feeling is we don't like it, we don't want to feel that way, we want it to go away, we want to feel the exact opposite etc. The ACT (google Acceptance and Commitment Therapy) perspective on feelings is to sit with them, don't judge them, and accept that they are there. Fortunately no one has ever died from feeling an emotion. I wonder what it would look like if your were to sit with the fear, acknowledge that it is there and try and avoid pushing it away? 

Its usually the struggles that we have with our emotions that cause secondary suffering. I don't want to take away from the experience you are having with anxiety, but just thought this might be something to consider.

AGrace