Need help!

Laurennn · ‎26-04-2016

Hi,

My name is Lauren and I am 25 year old female. Last year in January, I put in a complaint at my work against an older gentleman manager. The workplace turned evil against me and after a few months of meetings etc. I was then disciplined for non related matters. As a consequence of this, for the first time in my life I started getting anxiety. I have always been an anxious thinker, but never to the point of it being an issue for me before. I can't be sure if it was this alone that caused me to have basically a mental breakdown, or this just contributed to already existing mental health issues.

I couldn't work, sleep, eat or function AT ALL for about 2 months. I lost 10 kg's and every day was sinking deeper and deeper into a state of depression/anxiety. My parents decided they would no longer help me and I was admitted to a private mental facility for treatment. I was diagnosed with Major Depression and anxiety and stayed in the facility for 6 weeks.

Since I was discharged, I have been on antidepressant medications. Although this was 15 months ago, I am still not back at work. In this time I have moved back out of my parents, am living in an apartment with my cousin, gotten into a relationship - and tried to get my life back on track.

In 2013, I was diagnosed with Crohn's Disease, I thought I coped quite well with this diagnoses but recently I have been quite sick and feel all those depression and anxiety feelings coming back. I've been thinking about EVERYTHING and it's driving me insane.

I really need to talk to someone who can give me some positive steps to feel like I'm getting myself back on track and looking after myself again. The last place I want to go back to is that deep dark hole of depression and anxiety, which I fear I will sink back there everyday. I've realised through this time that my 'boyfriend' doesn't understand what I'm going through, so I feel hurt by that, thinking he knew my issues with anxiety and depression, but maybe he only wanted to be with me when I was well enough to put on a happy face.

Thanks for reading & look forward to chatting soon,

Lauren

blondguy · ‎26-04-2016

Hello Lauren

You are most welcome in the forums and thankyou for posting. My name is Paul and I will try to help you

You have been through a great deal...and even that is an understatement. I do understand the anxiety/depression you are going through. I have had them for many years.

The bad experience you had at work could have been a 'trigger' for your anxiety that was dormant at the time. I have also had a similar experience at work which triggered my anxiety too Lauren.

Anyhow..enough of my history....If I may ask you....do you have a good GP/Therapist that is helping you? You are smart to take the AD's so you can build a platform on which you can heal.If you scroll to the bottom of this page you will see a Header called "Supporting Someone". If you print it out and see if your BF can get a better idea of the dark place you have been in.

It would be great if you could post back about if you are having regular visits to a doc that you can feel relief after leaving her/his clinic.

The AD's are not a cure but very necessary...they help us get rid of the lows so we can find a place to heal....

I am sincerely sorry about your parents and how they were prior to your mental health facility....

Lauren...you probably know this anyway and I apologise if it seems like crap but a good quality REM sleep can work wonders.....please try to switch off your cellphone/tablet at least 30 minutes before going to bed...Anxiety has a lot less power when a person is rested...

Please let us know about what help you are getting at the moment and frequency....if you wish of course...

I am have been on a small amount of AD's and a calmative for a few years...I still see my GP for a tune up frequently....There are many very kind people on the forums that can be here for you..

You deserve some peace.....It would be great if you could post back Lauren

My Kind Thoughts for you

Paul

Laurennn · ‎27-04-2016

Hi Paul,

Thank you so much for your reply. It is so lovely to have someone understand what I am going through.

I have an excellent GP that is supporting me & I was seeing a Pyschologist but I stopped going. It was very expensive and I found myself cancelling the appointments. Maybe I should start these up again. It was difficult as I couldn't see her very often, only every few weeks so I didn't feel like I was making any progress.

I have no intention of coming off my AD's, as I know they have been a life saver. I will continue to take them, as visit my pyschiatrist as scheduled.

I will chat to my boyfriend about his support, thank you for referring me to that factsheet. He is very young, and sometimes I wonder whether he actually even cares enough to try and help.

I find it hard to keep myself productive, I wake up in the morning & feel like I don't have anything to do so why bother getting out of bed. I know this isn't healthy but it seems so much easier.

My parents have learnt a lot in understanding & I feel I can talk to them now about what I'm going through, but then I also feel like a burden to tell them I'm still having problems.

Thank you again for your message - I appreciate it so much 🙂

blondguy · ‎30-04-2016

Hi Laurennn

Thanks for posting back 🙂

You are very pro-active and self aware where your recovery is concerned and well done! I am pretty sure that Dept of Health allow 6 free visits with a psychiatrist per year for people that are out of work if that helps..

You have made progress with your parents as well 🙂 You are never a burden by telling them how you feel...Depression can hang around for a long time.

Having a good GP is gold....I am always going in for a tune up and encouragement when my depression hits hard.

Sorry about the delay in getting back to you...If you want to post back again you are most welcome.

Kind Thoughts

Paul