My friend didn't show up and I was left alone at lunch. My depression and anxiety took over.

help_me1 · ‎04-09-2017

So I have extremely high anxiety and depression. My life changed after a traumatic experience last year and I haven't been the same. I'm in year 8 and I've started at a new school this year and somehow I've ended up from having 15 friends to having 1. This happened in the span of 2 weeks. My only friend has been really sick and won't be coming to school this week and today I was left alone to sit at both breaks. No one talked to me and I was left to sit by my self. I tried to socialise at lunch but my social anxiety took over. At my old school I didn't have anyone to talk to or hang out with at breaks. I was left in my own thoughts and that's what it's starting to feel like at this new school. Even when my friend is there I feel alone. He's my best friend but yet we both know we're the only friends we're ever going to have at that school. But because my friend wasn't there I was fighting back tears because a flood of memories from my old school came back. It wasn't fun holding back tears all day. If anyone has ANY advice on how to get me through these days please tell me. I don't have therapy until Thursday and all I want to do is stay in bed and cry.

BballJ · ‎04-09-2017

Hi help_me,

Sorry to read what you are going through, I dealt with the same pain on not having many friends at school either and spent a lot of breaks on my own. I know you said you only have one person at the school you are friends with but is there anyone else you talk to in class? I know how hard it can be, I used to go to the library during breaks just so I wasn't outside on my own. Is there any activities you can do during breaks, I thought most schools offer things during breaks to do which may also help to make new friends as well. Are you working on the social anxiety with your therapist? I know how hard it can be to make new friends when you have social anxiety as well but working through that should hopefully make it easier down the track.

Hopefully tomorrow is a better day.

My best for you,

Jay

tap182 · ‎04-09-2017

It may not fell like it but you will probably make more friends at the school...Eventually. You will also become happier soon enough.

What do you like doing? Liking something attracts people that like the same or similar things, perhaps you could pursue things you are interested in the mean time while you wait for your friend to return? 🙂 Friends will just show up that way, naturally, and effortlessly. In my experience, at least :).

Laurenn · ‎05-09-2017

Hey there,

i am so happy that i have come across your post because the EXACT same thing has happened to me.

Im in year 9 and also struggle with depression and anxiety. I also used to have a larger friendship circle but some how now only have 1 friend. However she and I have no classes together and struggle to find each other on our breaks, so i often end up sitting alone. I am so terrified to socialise with anyone else.

Not only physically being alone, i also felt so alone in the sense that no one else did this either. Just know that you are not alone in feeling this way.

I used to sit in the bathrooms at recess and lunch because i didn't want people to see me on my own. People would suggest telling the teachers so that they can help me find a group to sit with but the truth is i don't even want people to hang out with. I hate feeling so alone but i struggle to reach out to others.

I know I'm not the best with advice but we are similar ages dealing with similar things so if you ever have anything on your find mind that you need to talk about or need someone to talk to on days where you are feeling alone, either at school or after school, please reply and contact me.