Hi Lost_Bee
Welcome to the forum and congratulations for taking a chance and making your first post. Please know that you have arrived at a place of non-judgemental support.
I am very sorry that you are unwell and that you’ve been struggling for a long time with both serious depression and severe anxiety. I know from over 10 years of personal experience caring for my daughter (she fell ill with anxiety and OCD at age thirteen) how tiring and frustrating it can be on a long haul journey. I’m sorry that life is so challenging for you.
I know you’ve been trying to recover for a while and hear you when you say that you don’t know what to do next. I’d like to encourage you to undertake a full and frank assessment of where you’re at.
This involves thinking about what’s currently working for you and what isn’t. Also consider the approach(es) you’ve tried in the past. Then research what further options exist. You might like to invite mum to participate as well. You can also talk with a beyond blue counsellor via web chat (they have helped me in the past) or we can brainstorm together here (others will likely join in too).
The end result could include things like adjusting your current treatment plan, getting a fresh opinion from a professional, trying a new therapy or medication.
My daughter found herself stuck and feeling lost several times over her journey toward wellness. We tried many different approaches, from in-patient hospital admissions to try specific programs, to new psychologists, to different medications, to new therapies. Every change was a leap of faith but necessary because if something’s not working you need to move on. The issue isn’t you, it’s that you’ve yet to find the right treatment. In my daughter’s case, the second type of medication and third type of treatment explored have worked for her.
I really want to encourage you to plough on. It can get better.
Please post anytime.
Kind thoughts to you
