i'm freaking out and dont want to lose him to WEED

[music_my-life]

ok so my best mate is an occasional user of weed and usually because it's now and then I don't freak out about him using it but now it's scaring me. for the past week he has had it every second day and I knew that on Thursday afternoon when he had a bit of a breakdown because school has been talking about mental shit to his pe class and it brings back bad memories of his past and then retarted year 7/8 being all stuck up to him when he saw him being that way and all. I knew the next day he'd be high and I was right. the night on Thursday I had a recurring dream about having to save him from hurting himself. because of that i'm scared that the dream means that he will do the same stupid thing and come close too many times but saved in the nack of time but will one day go too far and no one can stop it from happening.

I also have a dating history with him but after we broke up we became really close friends and yes, I still love him and he knows that but he does like someone else who is a friend of our group but she is a little too use to people in her life doing it and stuff and i'm not really good with that. my philosophy is as long as you know the consequences of your choices go right ahead but I will not agree with everything or disagree with everything either.( if that makes any sense to you readers)

pls help cause I don't know what to do about this and as I've said in previous forums I have anxiety and these sort of problems, when they dwell in me like this I play up a bit and ya I don't know how to handle this.

[Narniakid]

Hey there music=my life, thank you for sharing.

I remember my then-best mate doing the same stuff in high school and I totally freaked out similarly to what you've described. Unfortunately, drug use is commonplace in our high schools and I felt so disappointed at my friends who I had thought had given up on everything to put their time and energy into their new bad habit. 

I can assure you that a lot of it a phase; I cannot guarentee that your friend will finish school and just suddenly loose all interest, but the social stigma of drug use does become much less important to whether or not you're considered "cool" and "badass" when you take school out of the picture. 

Two years on and I'm dating someone who is a regular smoker of weed. If you had told me two years ago that I'd be actually in LOVE with someone who uses the thing that caused me so much anxiety, I'd have told you that's ridiculous. What changed was the fact I have accepted the fact that weed use is not the end of the world, and doesn't mean someone has given up their life because of it. Once you accept that you cannot control someone's actions, despite how much you love them, it will help you come to terms with what your best mate has taken up.

Crystal

[pipsy]

Hi there, music=my=life.  I too am concerned about your friends constant use of weed.  I know Narniakid means well, but I've seen lots of problems associated with long term use of substances.  I would try talking to your friend, or maybe someone else close to him, another male friend he looks up to.  The more he uses, the more the need for more.  Any addiction is like that.  If you have access to literature about the long term effect of drugs, this could help him realize the damage he's doing.  Maybe have a talk with someone who knows more about the damage he's doing.  Weed is drug, you can't dress it up by saying it doesn't effect, it does.  I am not passing judgement, I have seen personally what the long term effects of drug abuse does.  He may stop smoking, but not before damage is done.  Everytime he lights up, he's doing more damage.  He needs help now, before he gets more addicted.  

[music_my-life]

thnx both for your advice and hay since ive talked to him he hasn't so far done any of it but next week will be a whole new thing so ya. idk he's generally a smart guy but as I say.

some people are smart but just make stupid choices