Family issue's

Saltnlight
Community Member
I feel like anything i do my parents will not be proud, they are constantly putting me down, pointing out the things i did wrong insteed of right. Sometimes it get to much i cant take it anymore. I'm 23 but feel like a child to them. I with i didnt have live here i just want to run away sometimes . Any advice?
4 Replies 4

Quiettall
Blue Voices Member

Hi there

Are you working? Or have you made an appointment to see either a GP or counsellor about how you feel? This is not the way you need live your life. Is there particular things they are unhappy about with you, or just everything in general?

Have you tried the links on the bottom of this page, or maybe even reached out to talk to someone at Headspace?

Zeal
Community Member

Hey Saltnlight,

Welcome to the forum!

Just for context, I'm a 24 year old female and live with my parents as well.

Being put down and criticised by your parents, especially as you live at home, would be emotionally difficult. If you don't mind me asking, can you give an example of how your parents criticise you? Are there particular areas of your life they focus on? Also, do you have siblings?

Talking to your parents about how their comments make you feel is important. You've probably already done this, but it sounds as though there hasn't been a change. It's important to talk to them together when the three of you are not stressed or busy. With serious conversations, timing is important. The key is not to blame or accuse your parents, but instead focus on how you feel in certain situations. For example, rather than saying "You're always criticising me and it's making me unhappy", you could say something like "When you tell me I need to get my life together, it makes me feel bad about myself. I am trying, and I'd love support." This is just a rough example.

Try calling the Family Relationship Advice Line on 1800 050 321. This is an Australia-wide service, and is available from 8 am to 8 pm on Monday to Friday, and 10 am to 4 pm on Saturday.

Here is a previous forum thread you may relate to:

https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/relationship-and-family-issues/controlling-parents---feeling-miserable-#qlfuyHHzvGGEbv8AAOnT_A

It would be great to hear back from you 🙂

Best wishes,

Zeal

Saltnlight
Community Member

Its allways been this way ever sence i was officially digonosed with austism when i was twelve they've pointed out my flaws. Yes do it sometimes out of love but it just comes out as nagging. No i'm not working cause about 5 years ago i was digonosed with a rare auto imune disease, with has caused me to sink deeper into depression. These past five years have been rough. Yes they look after my physical needs but not my mental needs. I allways told "oh get over it , theres allways someone worse off then you. I wish my parents were more careing but thats just them. I trying to my independent but theres just too over protective. Thanks for its allways nice just to vent.

geoff
Champion Alumni
hello Saltnlight, it's very brave for you to post your comment but want to thankyou.
It must be upsetting to know that your parents do look after all the physical needs but don't understand that with these needs comes depression, the two have to be linked together.
If you can get your parents to read this site 'autism and depression' or perhaps you could print it out and leave on the coffee table, only because they need to know more about how you are struggling.
It is great that they are protective of you, but with this protection means to look after you with your mental issues, because the two of these go hand in hand.
How are you coping with this immune disease which I'm so sorry for and the treatment you need. Geoff.