FAQ

Find answers to some of the more frequently asked questions on the Forums.

Forums guidelines

Our guidelines keep the Forums a safe place for people to share and learn information.

Dealing with rumors

taraanita
Community Member

Hi everyone,

Im 21 and this isnt really a major problem and I feel stupid for posting about it but its something thats really bothering me. Basically to give you a backstory my boyfriend (25) recently moved out of his old living situation with one of his friends (or so we thought) and his girlfriend because he was pretty much paying more than his fair share rent and bills and they just werent very good roommates. In january his friend began using steroids again and lying to his girlfriend who eventually found them, he lied to her, she asked me and my bf and we basically said that it was probably true (im obviously not going to lie to someone who was my friend and shes not stupid) they got into a big argument her bf yelled at me for telling her the truth blah blah blah.

So my boyfriend moved out they have since broken up and apparently she has been going round saying they had found a bag of drugs (crack to be specific) in the bathroom (of the house my bf moved out of a few months ago). Shes been saying its my bfs and hes smoking it etc to pretty much any mutual friends of ours she runs into- they dont particularly like her and therefore dont believe it. Now the day he moved out his mum cleaned the whole house so im sure she wouldve found it and also my bfs roommate (steriod man) has used these substances in the past and has friends who do too so im assuming its theirs. But in a past relationship of mine there were rumors of my partner cheating etc and they turned out to be true so rumors are quite a sore spot for me and hard to deal with.

I know the side affects and symptoms of this drug and he isnt exhibiting any of them apart from being stressed out but considering as he runs his own business and works basically all day id say thats a given. I have spoken to him about it, he denies it and i know shes not a very reliable source and doesnt have either of our best interests at heart (past events have proven this and seeing as shes speaking to everyone else about it and not us) but its just sitting in the back of my mind because of past relationships. We also cant really be bothered confronting her as she will likely lie and cause a lot of drama which we dont want.

this was probably very poorly written and hard to follow but can someone please help with this crappy situation because im terrible at dealing with this kind of petty drama.

2 Replies 2

PatT
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hi Taraanita,

To be honest, there isn't really much you can do except trust in his word and look at the evidence. The people spreading the rumours seem incredibly deceitful and untrustworthy, you have your own anxieties surrounding rumours with your history and such (which is fair) and from the perspective of somebody who has had a long history of drug abuse, it's pretty easy to tell when somebody is smoking crack.

I had a big problem with painkillers which are relatively easy to conceal but I knew a lot of meth users and they were the most obvious in the world. Plus meth is pretty often associated with steroids as the recreational drug of choice (calorie free, appetite suppressant) - that and coke. And you yourself said that his mother cleaned the place - she would have found it to begin with. They sound like they have an agenda and just like slurring people. Trust in him until he starts to show otherwise.

taraanita
Community Member
Thanks so much PatT I didnt really know where to go or who to speak to regarding this and its really helpful to hear it from another persons perspective particularly someone who has more knowledge and experience in the area than I do. Thank you again