Young people

Confused..

replies: 1

Hi.. Okay, so, I’m new to this, some mates of mine suggested they were worried about me. So it thought this wouldn't be such a bad place to start, I'm not really sure why I am where I'm at.. but, I guess this is worth a shot.. I finished high school ... View more

Hi.. Okay, so, I’m new to this, some mates of mine suggested they were worried about me. So it thought this wouldn't be such a bad place to start, I'm not really sure why I am where I'm at.. but, I guess this is worth a shot.. I finished high school last year, and fair to say it had many ups and downs, there were stages a couple of years ago at school where I felt like I was being excluded from my only friends and I would dread recess and lunchtimes and would occasionally spend them crying in the toilets. Later that year, I attempted to change friendship groups and I copped a bit of slack for that, I got through it all and the next year ran somewhat smoothly. The following year I found myself in not a very good place, with no real reason for me to feel such a way. I pretty much just hated myself, I wasn’t enjoying school, and sport, the only thing I really had, was becoming a drag. I felt myself drifting away from everyone, no one noticed me and I would continually hide behind a fake smile and pretend everything was fine. I pushed all that away, and convinced myself that there was nothing to worry about, and got through the rest of my schooling. This year I commenced university, and the year has been interesting, I like my course, but other than that, things haven’t been going great, I’m terrible with making friends and find myself feeling more and more alone, yet I’m surrounded by people. I’ve sunk back into the same place I was, I have some bad days, where I just want to stay in my room and avoid anyone and everyone, where even the simplest task seem too much, I don't have many friends, well, not true friends. I find it hard to explain how I’m feeling and why. I tend to act happy and pretend everything is fine, cos really, I have no excuse for it not to be? Recently and in the past, I have opted to a pretty minor form of self-harm and to be honest, it’s hard to say why, I guess it’s a case of control and actually feeling something. Some people have expressed concern recently, and I'm not entirely sure how to take it.. I’m totally confused about it all, not sure if there’s anything wrong with me, or if I’m just experiencing a couple of bad days, either way, I’m determined to move past it.

feeling like a burden

replies: 2

Hello! My story is not as traumatic/hard as any other but i feel like my life is just passing by. Since i was a child people treated me different (im half spanish half danish in a spanish school, so teachers and classmates treated me different), they... View more

Hello! My story is not as traumatic/hard as any other but i feel like my life is just passing by. Since i was a child people treated me different (im half spanish half danish in a spanish school, so teachers and classmates treated me different), they would ignore me. I could say happilly good morning and none would reply, they would make fun of me, but never straight up bullying. Just ignored me most of the time. I had 2 real friends first when i was 13, moved to south of spain at 14, had the best two years of my life because i finally had my group of friends. Also, ironically, the worst years of my life ;my mother and i would fight everyday(even christmas and bdays) I moved with my dad, and came back to my old school because i couldnt manage the stress of the constant fightings. There i made two friends After i finished school i went to university. I initially wanted to study mechanical engineering but my grades werent as good so i was placed in another engineering. I had the worst year, i studied very little, had 2 friends i hanged out with once a month, but however a caring boyfriend. I felt stupid, alone and useless, as i knew i was just wasting time on internet. Second year i tried uni again, but failed ,so i stopped halfway and moved to denmark. Now im living in a fraternity and trying to get my danish so i can study mechanical next year. I´ll start uni at 21 or 22 years old. I think i had depression or something similar for two years, i lack friends and im paranoid as to why people dont like me. I try me best to start conversations, being nice and funny yet its hard as hell. Now i have friends in math, but im scared ill lose them once this is over. I want my discipline back. To know how to be social, and not have panick attacks if theres too many people i dont know. I want to be usefull, and be someone people respect and admire. Sometimes i feel like i dont deserve all this i have, i feel sick thinking about all these years ive wasted. I feel anxious thinking my youth is being wasted just because im scared of people, of being myself and because i dont study. I feel like im letting my dad down. Im jelaous of my friends in spain, for they are in their 3 year of uni, have lots of friends and live the youthfull partycrazy life. I thank anyone whos made it up to this point, i feel a bit bad knowing many will think this is nothing compared to other peoples situations. I bid you farewell. virus

How can I help my friend?

replies: 5

My best friend was diagnosed with depression early last week, and since then I've rarely seen her. She doesn't go to school before recess, and she usually leaves before lunch. She hasn't gone to any history classes at all so she's very behind in scho... View more

My best friend was diagnosed with depression early last week, and since then I've rarely seen her. She doesn't go to school before recess, and she usually leaves before lunch. She hasn't gone to any history classes at all so she's very behind in school and doesn't look like she's anywhere close to catching up. I'm really worried about her. She called me half an hour ago crying because her mum is trying to force her to go to a university opening day but she doesn't want to, and I had no idea what to say or how to make her feel better. I'm her best friend, I should know how to help her but I don't. Should I get her to come over to my house so I can help her with school stuff? Should I call her mum and try to get her to understand? Should I tell my mum and get help from her? (note: my Nan suffers from bipolar disorder so my mother has grown up around mental illness and knows more about it than I do) I'm reading heaps of articles about depression and other mental illnesses online, but that's not helping. I know every body is different and that no case is the same, but can anyone give me some advice on what to do? I'm worried.

Fed up I even exist. (Non- suicidal)

replies: 1

As the title says , I'm a 21 year old guy who really hates himself inside and out I'm in war with me , but what really gets to me is just the way I look , now I am a straight guy so don't judge , when I look in the mirror I just can't stand it , I'm ... View more

As the title says , I'm a 21 year old guy who really hates himself inside and out I'm in war with me , but what really gets to me is just the way I look , now I am a straight guy so don't judge , when I look in the mirror I just can't stand it , I'm 186cms tall weight 86 , kind of athletic build but no abs and I claim I'm skinny fat , I feel like people who I know is feeding me lies saying that I am good looking oh your body is perfect but seriously their eyes must be screwed I am a guy who has self confidence issues and is to reserved and has an off putting body and vibe that's what I see when I glance at myself , people I know claim that I turn heads when I go by but I believe it's not true, something's seriously is wrong maybe it's just me or maybe their fake compliments just to make me be quite? Is there such thing as this ? How can I get over this stupid habit.

fed up

replies: 2

New to this so not really sure how to lay this out but here goes. Angry. Sad. Numb. Fine. This is the range of emotions that feels most natural to me. Or atleast the most honest. When i'm happy, during those moments, it feels like i'm trying too hard... View more

New to this so not really sure how to lay this out but here goes. Angry. Sad. Numb. Fine. This is the range of emotions that feels most natural to me. Or atleast the most honest. When i'm happy, during those moments, it feels like i'm trying too hard, or it's so foreign to me that I don't completely feel it, like my body is rejecting it. And as soon as i'm no longer, "happy", I feel so much more myself, and honest. It's like, when I have a good day, it's as if my hormones, or god, or karma, or whatever it is you believe in decides "you know what, you deserve just one nice moment, of calm, and joy, and contentment". So it's like it's given to me, with the promise of it's only a temporary gift, and i'm not to forget it was never mine to begin with. that's what happiness feels like to me. getting better to me seems futile because of this. seeing the psychologists, who all treat virtually the same way, one hour sessions that barely scrape the surface of the same recycled crap i've already been talking about for years to the point where sometimes i don't even know if the words i'm saying are my own anymore. it just, it all seems pointless. and i'm fed up with everyone telling me that "it doesn't have to be like this", that "life is worth living". i'm frustrated and angry, sure, but mostly i'm just full of despair at this point. not even just sadness, that's not a specific enough description, despair is much more akin to how i feel right now. other words like hopeless or meaningless or pointless or worthless could be used too, but its really despair that i feel right now. and have been feeling for 7 months now. the only other way i can think to describe how i feel is the way one feels in a circumstance of unrequited love. something you want so badly but something that you will never have, yet you can't rid yourself of this unhealthy addiction to an idea, and you've never even been with the person before but you're convinced it's what you want, but how can you know you want if you don't even know what it truly is in reality. that's how i feel about happiness. like i've been chasing this romanticised idea. and i'm sick of chasing, to the point where i feel stupid, like i've been chasing something that was never worth chasing in the first place, because it wasn't going to be satifisfying. i have an emptiness inside me which i now worry can't be satiated with anything, an unnatural yearning for something that doesn't exist. thankyou for listening..

I don't know what to do.

replies: 5

Hi my name is jack and im 16 years old.I recently started having panic attacks and anxiety and i don' t know what to do. I'm always nervous about school and everything i have to do and im always trying to take on the problems of my friends and help t... View more

Hi my name is jack and im 16 years old.I recently started having panic attacks and anxiety and i don' t know what to do. I'm always nervous about school and everything i have to do and im always trying to take on the problems of my friends and help them out. By doing that i've always just pushed my problems back and tried to forget about them but it's getting worse and i cant do that anymore. I've noticed that i always have panic attacks in my music class, mainly when i need to perform, but its the subject that i tend to think the most in. My dad knows i have panic attacks but he doesnt know how bad it is and i've spoken to a few of my friends about it and my year advisor but i've never spoken to them about what triggers it. I don't know if i should start talking to people more about what is happening as for me it is peaceful being alone but i hate it at the same. I've never thought that i would have the thoughts that i had today and as much as i don't want to i've been contemplating self-harming. I don't want to but right now i feel it is the only way to get my mind off of everything going on right now. I can't sleep anymore and i can't concentrate on work in class or at home anymore and it's causing me to fall behind in class which is making me feel worse. I don' t know what to do but i felt i had to let it all out for once instead of bottling it all up.beyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.

I feel like i have depression and that everything about me is just disgusting but i dont know if its just teenage hormones?

replies: 3

For a while now i have felt really depressed and i was worried i might have depression but i'm not sure if its just a teenage thing, i don't want to go see my doctor and find out that its just some teenage thing, but i'm really worried. Recently my m... View more

For a while now i have felt really depressed and i was worried i might have depression but i'm not sure if its just a teenage thing, i don't want to go see my doctor and find out that its just some teenage thing, but i'm really worried. Recently my mum kicked me out and i had to move states to live with my dad and that just made things worse. My whole life I've been a really anxious and nervous person, always thinking people are judging me 24/7 and i haven't had the worse life but i haven't had the best, ive been through some pretty traumatic stages. I've been constantly doing test on the internet for depression and all have said there is a possibility but im still worried im just exaggerating things. I feel like i cant talk to anyone about because i feel like they might think im being ridiculous and over-exaggerating everything. I don't always feel depressed, im really happy and enjoy life when im with my friends but other times i feel sad and don't want to do anything i just want sleep or cry and i don't know why, i cant sleep properly and its frustrating, i cant be bothered to do anything especially when it comes to school, ive lost interest in playing soccer (ive played it my life and i really enjoyed playing but know i just feel anxious and nervous, i feel like people will judge everything i do), i get irritated easily and its really bad and gets me in trouble because i usually end up getting in full on arguments or getting in fights with my brother. Sometimes i just hate my life and want to lie down and pretend that i don't need to worry about everything and that im perfect but i usually just end up more depressed knowing nothing will ever be perfect. I probably sound like an over dramatic teenage girl but i just want to know if this is normal for a teenager or not because, i beat myself everyday over it, i just want to feel normal, i don't want to judge myself and feel like people are judging me all the time, i want to be able to talk to someone but not feel like im wasting there time. i really want to know if there is anything wrong with me that i need t tell someone about and get help or im just being a teenager.

Someone be kind and message me.

replies: 4

The reason I have decided to come on here tonight is because the past few days/nights I have been feeling really down and depressed.I suffer from depression and are taking Anti-Depressants but it doesn't help that I hardly take them. I feel as if i a... View more

The reason I have decided to come on here tonight is because the past few days/nights I have been feeling really down and depressed.I suffer from depression and are taking Anti-Depressants but it doesn't help that I hardly take them. I feel as if i am alone in this world and have no one, no friends, no one there for me when i need someone the most. I am fine being alone most of the time but it's the feeling of having no one to talk too literally having no one to talk too is very depressing. I currently do not work, go to school or tafe. I spend most of my life at home doing nothing and you can imagine that doesn't help one bit. If I was busy I am sure I wouldn't feel this way but there is nothing for me to do, I try my best to find work but it's very had especially since i dropped out of school.AllI need Is someone to talk too anyone.

Is this anxiety and if so what should I do?

replies: 1

I'm 22 and previously have felt really good about my life; doing really well at university studying law, FANTASTIC family, good job, just moved into my own apartment, etc. I know some of what I am going to say sounds ridiculous, but I just want to be... View more

I'm 22 and previously have felt really good about my life; doing really well at university studying law, FANTASTIC family, good job, just moved into my own apartment, etc. I know some of what I am going to say sounds ridiculous, but I just want to be truthful about what is going on in my head.I've really been struggling with extreme worry. Largely I think it relates to my law studies... for example, I was previously involved on the board of a Cambodian charity which I got to know through Rotary. As part of my law studies we researched Australia's terrorism laws which include huge penalties for people who finance terrorism, obviously. It mentioned overseas aid organisations. Now, this is an organisation which is registered with the relevant bodies in Aus and Cambodia and has an Australian Rotarian overseeing all finances. All expenditure is accounted for. However, I have this absolute paranoia that somehow, in several years, something could happen and I'll go to jail. I've now left the board for various reasons but largely because I felt I couldn't cope with the responsibility with my current mental health.This is one example of several absolutely awful "worst case" scenarios I have come up with in my head about a range of things. They usually relate to legal problems and criminal charges. It is worsened partly because my partner lives OS and I am hoping to move there in a year, and need a "clean record" for the visa.I am well aware that this sounds absolutely ridiculous, but this worry is taking over my life. A lot of days I just lie in bed and try to sleep so I don't have to think about it which for obvious reasons is impacting my studies. I have even had suicidal thoughts relating to this as I so totally convince myself it is going to happen and so I should just "end it now". In my head the risk is SO REAL even though even I know it sounds crazy on paper. I try to tell myself I am being ridiculous, hundreds of these organisations operate and we have done everything very carefully. But it doesn't help. Plus, I "solve" one problem and just move on to the next. I am literally completely terrified most of the time. Honestly,I don' t know what to do about it. I am seeing a counsellor but I don't think they understand just how bad my worry is. I feel like she tends to laugh it off as my concerns seem so far-fetched, but they are real to me. I don't even know if this is anxiety or something else. Please can someone help/advise? beyondblue’s clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636. Normal 0 false false false EN-AU X-NONE X-NONE /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0cm 5.4pt 0cm 5.4pt; mso-para-margin-top:0cm; mso-para-margin-right:0cm; mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt; mso-para-margin-left:0cm; line-height:115%; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi; mso-fareast-language:EN-US;}

I don't want to be like this

replies: 1

I think something is wrong with me. I don't like who I am. I have a really amazing life, with an amazing family and amazing boyfriend and friends. Yet, I still feel so alone and often dislike myself. I think I really screwed things up with my boyfrie... View more

I think something is wrong with me. I don't like who I am. I have a really amazing life, with an amazing family and amazing boyfriend and friends. Yet, I still feel so alone and often dislike myself. I think I really screwed things up with my boyfriend tonight. I got upset about something and then I got really emotional, I couldn't control it and I couldn't think straight and I just acted completely crazy and unlike myself. It wasn't until a few hours later that I could think rationally again. I don't want to be like this, and I really don't know why I can't control my emotions. I hate myself for making my boyfriends life hard, and for putting strain on our relationship. I think I was suffering from depression last year, and I saw a counsellor at uni for a while which I think helped, but I felt like I couldn't completely open up. I feel like I've been so good lately until the past few days. Although, I can always feel depression in the background, like it's always tugging at me and I'm constantly trying to ignore it and fight it off. I don't want to be like this forever. It's so hard and I just don't know what to do.

Pinned discussions

New to this Forum? Please read this first!

replies: 0

All discussions

Confused..

replies: 1

feeling like a burden

replies: 2

How can I help my friend?

replies: 5

Fed up I even exist. (Non- suicidal)

replies: 1

fed up

replies: 2

I don't know what to do.

replies: 5

I feel like i have depression and that everything about me is just disgusting but i dont know if its just teenage hormones?

replies: 3

Someone be kind and message me.

replies: 4

Is this anxiety and if so what should I do?

replies: 1

I don't want to be like this

replies: 1

Young people

New to this Forum? Please read this first! replies: 0

Confused.. replies: 1

feeling like a burden replies: 2

How can I help my friend? replies: 5

Fed up I even exist. (Non- suicidal) replies: 1

fed up replies: 2

I don't know what to do. replies: 5

I feel like i have depression and that everything about me is just disgusting but i dont know if its just teenage hormones? replies: 3

Someone be kind and message me. replies: 4

Is this anxiety and if so what should I do? replies: 1

I don't want to be like this replies: 1

New to this Forum? Please read this first!

replies: 0

Confused..

replies: 1

feeling like a burden

replies: 2

How can I help my friend?

replies: 5

Fed up I even exist. (Non- suicidal)

replies: 1

fed up

replies: 2

I don't know what to do.

replies: 5

I feel like i have depression and that everything about me is just disgusting but i dont know if its just teenage hormones?

replies: 3

Someone be kind and message me.

replies: 4

Is this anxiety and if so what should I do?

replies: 1

I don't want to be like this

replies: 1