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Young people

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romantic_thi3f Eeep! When study is overwhelming! - Tips, ideas and coping strategies
  • replies: 51

Hi! Just thought I’d make a post with some tips for study. I know this is something we can all struggle with. These are all suggestions so feel free to take them or leave them! Hope they help! If you only remember one thing, let it be this: You are i... View more

Hi! Just thought I’d make a post with some tips for study. I know this is something we can all struggle with. These are all suggestions so feel free to take them or leave them! Hope they help! If you only remember one thing, let it be this: You are important. Your grades don’t define you. (support) Studying can feel isolating but know you’re not alone! Reach out – and find or make friends that can support you along the way. If you’re having trouble finding some friends, join some local communities or clubs! They have lots at Uni’s and even stuff like open days are great ways to meet new people and find out what’s happening. Study groups can also be a great way to meet people and stay motivated. Also remind yourself why you’re doing this; inspirational wallpapers or quotes can be super inspiring. Remember the saying about the oxygen mask? If you can’t take care of yourself first studying will be harder. You are important. You know the drill - water, food, exercise, sleep. Try to stay calm. Stuff that might be able to help include mindfulness, breathing exercises, colouring in, going for walks, journaling, listening to music… If you’re struggling – reach out. See a therapist. Talk to your student counsellor. If you need help, don’t be afraid to ask for it. Also lots of Universities and TAFE offer disability services – which includes conditions like Depression and Anxiety. (study) Find the right study space for you. Maybe that’s in your room, or a coffee shop, or the library. Some people find that noise helps; other people not so much. If you like particular kinds of noise, you can find ‘coffee shop’ noise or ‘rain sounds’ to help concentrate. Make a plan. It helps to do it often so it becomes a habit. Anytime you get a due date, write it down. Maybe you could use a diary, planner, bullet journal or an app. I find the 30/30 App helpful - study for a bit and then break for a bit. You can also get add-on’s for your computer to block sites like Facebook if you find them too distracting. Find out what study technique works for you. Do you like cue cards? Mind maps? Colour coding? Does highlighting stuff help you remember? Charts, maps, diagrams? Recorded lectures? Goals! These are so important – not just writing down deadlines but rewarding yourself for meeting them. Even making smaller goals like ‘read two pages from a textbook’ can help. Break it down into bite size pieces, and don’t forget to reward yourself after!

Sophie_M NEW TO THIS FORUM? Please read this first
  • replies: 0

The Young People space is a sub-forum within the wider Beyond Blue forum community. 1. Its purpose is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss anxiety, depression and other related life issues. If you are aged over 25, please be mindfu... View more

The Young People space is a sub-forum within the wider Beyond Blue forum community. 1. Its purpose is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss anxiety, depression and other related life issues. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this forum is a space for younger people to connect and provide peer support for each other. 2. Content from this sub-forum is displayed on both the beyondblue and youthbeyondblue websites. 3. Please bear in mind that some members find content relating to suicide and/or self-harm distressing or triggering. If you would like to post on these topics, please do so in our Suicidal Thoughts and Self Harm section. Please see also our guidelines for making posts on this topic. Posts made here in the Young People sub-forum containing content relating to suicide and/or self-harm will be moved. 4. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straightaway. Information on how our system works can be found here. Being familiar with our community rules can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. 5. This is a peer support community, and to get the best out of being here we recommend that you 'give support to receive support'. More on how that works here.

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SLC My experience
  • replies: 6

I will be kind've ambiguous with this in terms of some details. I am still in school currently. Two years ago I saw a dead body. I started to isolate myself from people at that point. I was always a bit shy but this just completely got me. I have slo... View more

I will be kind've ambiguous with this in terms of some details. I am still in school currently. Two years ago I saw a dead body. I started to isolate myself from people at that point. I was always a bit shy but this just completely got me. I have slowly been destroying myself. I was losing everyone around me and the main cause was me. A year after this my grandmother died of old age. I had neglected her this whole time so it hit me bad over time. After that I completely isolated myself and lost everyone around me or at least that's how it feels. I am not close with anyone because of all this but I wish I was. I was filled with self-hate, guilt and doubt over myself. For over a year I sat there finding it more and more difficult to put on this fake smile so people wouldn't know.Everyday the same. Watching everything around me cave ion and the truth was it was all on me. I was and am causing it all. I have dealt with a few other things as well like the way I looked which I do and did hate. I hate who I am and think about all my actions second guessing myself. It's gotten worse and worse. It has been two years now since seeing the body and well the effect still feels so profound. I sometimes get these racing thoughts. Life honestly feels pointless most of the time. I struggle against that but when you have no friends and no one close then it's hard to find some direction or point in it. I really try not to but when the things you think might make you happy seem like an illusion sometimes it seems worthless. I feel like if I was in a relationship with someone then I could be honest with them and this one girl I tried to reach out to I just disappointed them, let them down and hurt them. I would describe it in stages. Maybe this sounds familiar. At first I blamed god for it all and I was mad thinking that the world had done me wrong then I slowly stopped and just got mad at myself. Didn't believe in god and don't. I slowly began to go so deep into this that I just cried myself to sleep and then I just stopped caring. Having things said to me everyday didn't help but I didn't care and I just let it all happen. I degraded myself as well because I really didn't care and well it made it all easier to swallow I think. Even now I barely cry but I still do, barely able to perceive what's real and what's not. If you try to convince yourself of something for so long then start to try something else then it gets hard to figure out which is which. I want to type this because I have never really laid it out like this externally. Haven't even told my counsellor which I have started seeing which doesn't really help.

sanaracats I just want support?
  • replies: 2

So I'm writing this just to get a little support from people. I don't know what to do. I know there is something wrong with me, but I'm just too afraid to talk about it to anyone. I feel so hopeless and worthless, and I feel like I have no one(even t... View more

So I'm writing this just to get a little support from people. I don't know what to do. I know there is something wrong with me, but I'm just too afraid to talk about it to anyone. I feel so hopeless and worthless, and I feel like I have no one(even though i know I do). I feel like I'm letting everyone down when I'm really not doing anything to let them down with. I hate waking up in the mornings, and I get very little sleep during the night. I've always been like that, but for as long as I can remember I've always felt like this. I used to self harm, and I've just recently started again. Like i know its not going to help me, but I just cant help it. With the whole feeling worthless and stuff, I know I'm not. I know I mean a lot to people like my family and friends, but I just cant move the feeling. I've always pushed people away, and never told anyone what goes on in this head of mine. I just can't physically or mentally talk to people about what troubles me. So talking to a doctor or psychiatrist is out of the picture. Getting real help is out of the picture, just cause it goes with the whole "talking about my feelings" thing. Honestly, this is the first time I have ever called out for help with this. Its getting to the point where I'm just going to give up. And I don't want too. Can someone give me any advise or anything? Please?

peachcabbage Nobody to turn to
  • replies: 1

Coming into this site and posting is very hard for me. One of the reasons is that my thoughts have lately become more and more disorganized. Another reason is that I am afraid that someone I know will read this. I have been diagnosed with depression ... View more

Coming into this site and posting is very hard for me. One of the reasons is that my thoughts have lately become more and more disorganized. Another reason is that I am afraid that someone I know will read this. I have been diagnosed with depression when I was 21, 2 years ago. I have a history of contemplating about suicide, but have never had the nerve to go through with it because I don't want my family (particularly my mom) to blame themselves for it. I am scared that one of these days, I would choose death over my love for my family. Last year, I was able to be more active and happy, but I have noticed that these past few months have me going back into the darkness of depression. I want to talk to my family and friends about it but my friends and father don't understand and write it off as me being dramatic, while my mother would just blame herself and say that she was a bad person, making me feel even worse. I have tried talking to a counselor before, but my mother would get angry if I share anything that would be considered damaging to what she thinks her image as a mother is. I feel that posting here is the best option for me at the moment. Has anyone else had a similar situation to mine, wherein they could not ask for professional help and have had nobody in their close circle to talk to? I feel very hopeless at the moment, but any advice on how to cope would be very much appreciated. Thank you for taking the time to read this.

tashi I finally did it !
  • replies: 3

I finally built up the courage to see a counselor and it was the best decision I ever made ! Long way to go and one day at a time . Thanks for the encouragement from the people here on beyond blue

I finally built up the courage to see a counselor and it was the best decision I ever made ! Long way to go and one day at a time . Thanks for the encouragement from the people here on beyond blue

toby91 Can somebody please give me some advice
  • replies: 1

Hi, I'm a 22 year old male engineering student living in Sydney and am seeking some advice as to what I should do about my own suspected depression. My father died by suicide while i was 9 years old leaving my mother, 7yo sister and myself behind. Th... View more

Hi, I'm a 22 year old male engineering student living in Sydney and am seeking some advice as to what I should do about my own suspected depression. My father died by suicide while i was 9 years old leaving my mother, 7yo sister and myself behind. This was a massive shock to the family and at that age I had never heard of the word depression or even known that my father was sick. Me and my mother have never really sat down and discussed how bad dad's depression was so I feel a little disconnected from my mother in that respect. I also feel like i should be strong enough to cope with this and not bounden my mother with the worry of it all even though she regular asks if I'm ok as if she suspects I'm not doing well. Throughout my life I have always noticed that I tend to grab onto father figures, such as my fathers friends in my teens or for instance my honours supervisor at this point and the only explanation I have for this is that I never had one growing up. Over my 4 years at uni I've had extreme ups and lows, although I'm unsure whether depression is the cause or not or rather the general battles of life that everyone experiences. I've managed extremely well to pass all of my courses and am currently completing my honours, however I have an addictive personality that I think can probably be linked back to my father (my father smoked, only giving up due to health scares and compulsively chewed his nails much the same as me and my sister who have tried to give up both multiple times) Its very much an anxious thing that triggers me to smoke or pick my nails . Since moving out of home I have become a cigarette also smoke cannabis usually daily (for the last 2 years) to do away with the constant thoughts that occupy my mind. At the moment I've recognised that its a problem and have limited myself to only smoking late at night and no longer during the day. Previously while i was at uni I was able to get away with not attending class, smoking at home all day and passing my engineering classes from home. Now that I'm doing my honours research and looking for a full-time graduate position I am no longer able to get away with this. I have just come out of a 2 year relationship with a girl who was also heavily depressed during the time I knew her. She managed to get her life back on track through the help and support of friends, and was regular taking antidepressants at the time we broke up. Over the last 4 years i have gradually lost my interest in my hobbies. I used to pay drums every day, have a hit of tennis or squash here and there, make web-sites when i was bored. Now days all i want to do it sleep in to 12 o'clock so that I don't have to think about the day ahead, my ex, how my thesis will be finished on time, how I'm going to find a good graduate position with a final mark of 65 or the loneliness that is to come. I think the main problem is that there are a number of things stacking up which are making it particularly bad for me at the moment. I am unable to go to sleep at night (only with the aid of cannabis) and I'm currently sitting here at 5am in the morning writing this after not being able to get to sleep. My mind is constantly thinking about my ex, friends that I've lost contact with over the course of my relationship, and general hopelessness in all senses. I'm trying to make a conscious effort to catch up with my friends and go out again but most of them are now in the same position of having finished work and having full-time jobs. Previous to this I was going out with my girlfriend on a regular basis. It wasn't until my best friend and roommate came out of his own 3 year relationship and was diagnosed with depression that we sat down and talked about it. He has very similar habits to me in terms of smoking cannabis, cigarettes and day to day activities and is convinced that I have it and should go see a psychiatrist. One other thing I've noticed lately is that I get extremely anxious when dealing with people who may judge me or have an impact on the outcome of my future (for instance my honours supervisor). My heart rate increases, I begin to sweat and I have trouble thinking clearly. This is definitely a confidence issue as i know if Im prepared and haven't stayed up all night and putting my work off during the day then i feel much more confident talking to him. I just feel like I'm lacking motivation to do anything in all aspects of my life at the moment. I feel extremely guilty about my honours research (even though I enjoy the field of study) and always feel like I have never done enough or its not good enough. I am somewhat a perfectionist in my work and this can sometimes be determinetal to me I believe. For the last week and half since i broke up with my ex I haven't been able to touch my uni work again and feel bad about not having work ready to submit. Its been a struggle to get myself motivated to complete my uni work at any point however. Anyway I've run out of chars. Thx Toby

winnie_darling It hurts and I can't stop crying
  • replies: 1

I just feel awful. I have a psychologist. I have a boyfriend. But nothing is going right. Everything is wrong and it's doing my head in. My boyfriend doesn't understand and just makes me more upset. I am doing my HSC so that is even more stress. I am... View more

I just feel awful. I have a psychologist. I have a boyfriend. But nothing is going right. Everything is wrong and it's doing my head in. My boyfriend doesn't understand and just makes me more upset. I am doing my HSC so that is even more stress. I am not okay with my existence. I am not good enough and there is a gnawing at the back of my mind to go back to self harming. I don't want to, but...I don't know...I just don't really want to exist so I don't have to cry every night and feel so alone.

AmyMay2 I broke down and cried in class today
  • replies: 12

Hey, I'm kinda new around here, so I thought I'd introduce myself. I'm Amy (well, that's the name I use online), I'm in year 11, and I think the stress is kinda getting to me. For a while (maybe a month or more, I've lost track) I've been feeling kin... View more

Hey, I'm kinda new around here, so I thought I'd introduce myself. I'm Amy (well, that's the name I use online), I'm in year 11, and I think the stress is kinda getting to me. For a while (maybe a month or more, I've lost track) I've been feeling kinda hollow. I'm not sure if it's depression yet, and I don't want to talk to my parents about it until I'm sure, so I thought I'd seek more anonymous help first as a way to stop it from getting any worse. Normally I wouldn't bother people about my moods, but for the past month or more I've felt empty inside all the time, and it takes a lot to cheer me up. Even if something does get a laugh out of me, the happiness only lasts for a few seconds before it's gone. If I'm reading comedy websites and relaxing then it could last for a couple of hours, but with assignments that's just not possible. And, the real reason I reached out is that it's affecting my relationships. All of my friends have noticed something is wrong, and I hardly join in on con stations anymore because I don't want to ruin their moods. Besides that, I'm also very irritable (although that could come from my insomnia) and I've been snapping at my friends. I actually broke down and cried in class today (and if my parents ever found out that I'd get a severe young lashing for it) because I had to completely scrap an assignment and start over. It's due on either Friday or Monday, but because of my moods I'm not sure if I'll get it done in time, and I may fail Drama. And lastly, it's affecting my relationship with my boyfriend. Lastly I've been swinging between irritated at him for 'smothering me' and always staring like he wants to jump in and do everything for me (although I think the irritation is really directed at myself for making him worried) or I've been really needy and almost manipulative (since he's always offering to buy me stuff, mostly food since that's what I like, and I feel like not refusing is sometimes using him). So... Uh... Yeah. That's me I guess. It actually makes me feel feel a little better to finally tell someone. Then again, I'm in an ok mood at the moment. If I wasn't I don't think I'd have the nerve to put all of this personal stuff in my first post.

DaenOwens96 feeling Worthless
  • replies: 7

I dropped out of school, I was meant to be In year 12. I'm stupid I don't work and have no motivation to do nothing. All I want to do is sleep all day.

I dropped out of school, I was meant to be In year 12. I'm stupid I don't work and have no motivation to do nothing. All I want to do is sleep all day.

sh91 feeling lost
  • replies: 2

Hi, I dont normally write posts, but I am at a point where I feel like I need to talk to someone. I am in my twenties, but in my early teens I was diagnosed with OCD and anxiety. It was an awful time, with plenty of work with a psychologist who didnt... View more

Hi, I dont normally write posts, but I am at a point where I feel like I need to talk to someone. I am in my twenties, but in my early teens I was diagnosed with OCD and anxiety. It was an awful time, with plenty of work with a psychologist who didnt do much for me, so I felt like I overcame the ocd on my own over a couple of years. I have always been a perfectionist, highly critical, and extremely stressed. I dont actually remember the last time I felt truly relaxed. That cant be good or normal. I dont have compulsions much anymore, however, anxiety and stress is still a problem for me, and I try to keep it hidden, but its hard. That period in my life is never talked about with my family, its never mentioned. For the past year/ year and half I have felt a deep change in me. I am always sluggish, everything seems like a chore, I get anxious in public situations and feel as though I am always being watched or criticised. I am down, and upset, and cry a lot, which I try to hide. I am moody with my family and I feel bad for that, but I cant help it. I feel like I have a rock in my head, and I am trying to fight against my brain and turn all the bad thoughts off. I have been studying since I completed high school and I have struggled with what I want to do as a career, even though I have worked so hard for top marks. After one industry not turning out to be what I thought it would be, after that disappointment, I got into a one year education course. I thought my love for the subject would make me a good teacher, with good hours and leave. But throughout the course last year I started having doubts, and I was too scared to tell my parents. I still am. I feel bad because I need to work and earn money, and I just got a job at a school for the rest of the year. But I am so down and anxious about every thought of this job and life in general. I dont know why. The thought of being a teacher now scares me; there are too many people to deal with, too many things to juggle, and too many people to be accountable to. I dont know what to do. Im so lost, I even feel numb. The thought of telling this to my family makes me even more upset as I dont think they will understand. I think I should see someone, but my previous experiences with psychologists has turned me off. I feel like I need help, time to stop and think about what I actually want in life, and time to try and be happy again. I tried to tell my mum the other day how I was feeling, I told her that I am always down, and she said I cant help you, go speak to someone. Almost like she didnt want to hear. I dont want to disappoint anyone, but I just dont think they understand. I dont know if I am depressed, or just anxious, with a combination of stress. Any help or words of guidance would be appreciated greatly. I just needed to tell someone. So thanks for hearing me.

Georgia05 It is all too much
  • replies: 3

I don't know from where to start. I feel that I hate who I am, I hate how my life is at the moment and I hate that I don't do anything to change all that. I've been overweight basically all my life and recently I managed to lose 20kg and I started fe... View more

I don't know from where to start. I feel that I hate who I am, I hate how my life is at the moment and I hate that I don't do anything to change all that. I've been overweight basically all my life and recently I managed to lose 20kg and I started feeling good about myself and being positive about the future. However, since I went back to uni after a gap year all the negative thoughts and feelings came back. I have no self belief that I can make it. I feel I'm not good enough and I'm not going to fulfil my goals. I doubt myself with everything I do. I tend to compare myself with others and wanting to be more like them and wondering why am I not like that? As a consequence of that I started my old eating habits and that makes feel even worse as I put some weight on and I dislike myself even more. I just wish I wasn't like that. I wish I was stronger and find ways to overcome all these and find a way to be happy.