Young people

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Eeep! When study is overwhelming! - Tips, ideas and coping strategies

replies: 51

Hi! Just thought I’d make a post with some tips for study. I know this is something we can all struggle with. These are all suggestions so feel free to take them or leave them! Hope they help! If you only remember one thing, let it be this: You are important. Your grades don’t define you. (support) Studying can feel isolating but know you’re not alone! Reach out – and find or make friends that can support you along the way. If you’re having trouble finding some friends, join some local communities or clubs! They have lots at Uni’s and even stuff like open days are great ways to meet new people and find out what’s happening. Study groups can also be a great way to meet people and stay motivated. Also remind yourself why you’re doing this; inspirational wallpapers or quotes can be super inspiring. Remember the saying about the oxygen mask? If you can’t take care of yourself first studying will be harder. You are important. You know the drill - water, food, exercise, sleep. Try to stay calm. Stuff that might be able to help include mindfulness, breathing exercises, colouring in, going for walks, journaling, listening to music… If you’re struggling – reach out. See a therapist. Talk to your student counsellor. If you need help, don’t be afraid to ask for it. Also lots of Universities and TAFE offer disability services – which includes conditions like Depression and Anxiety. (study) Find the right study space for you. Maybe that’s in your room, or a coffee shop, or the library. Some people find that noise helps; other people not so much. If you like particular kinds of noise, you can find ‘coffee shop’ noise or ‘rain sounds’ to help concentrate. Make a plan. It helps to do it often so it becomes a habit. Anytime you get a due date, write it down. Maybe you could use a diary, planner, bullet journal or an app. I find the 30/30 App helpful - study for a bit and then break for a bit. You can also get add-on’s for your computer to block sites like Facebook if you find them too distracting. Find out what study technique works for you. Do you like cue cards? Mind maps? Colour coding? Does highlighting stuff help you remember? Charts, maps, diagrams? Recorded lectures? Goals! These are so important – not just writing down deadlines but rewarding yourself for meeting them. Even making smaller goals like ‘read two pages from a textbook’ can help. Break it down into bite size pieces, and don’t forget to reward yourself after!

NEW TO THIS FORUM? Please read this first

replies: 0

The Young People space is a sub-forum within the wider Beyond Blue forum community. 1. Its purpose is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss anxiety, depression and other related life issues. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this forum is a space for younger people to connect and provide peer support for each other. 2. Content from this sub-forum is displayed on both the beyondblue and youthbeyondblue websites. 3. Please bear in mind that some members find content relating to suicide and/or self-harm distressing or triggering. If you would like to post on these topics, please do so in our Suicidal Thoughts and Self Harm section. Please see also our guidelines for making posts on this topic. Posts made here in the Young People sub-forum containing content relating to suicide and/or self-harm will be moved. 4. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straightaway. Information on how our system works can be found here. Being familiar with our community rules can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. 5. This is a peer support community, and to get the best out of being here we recommend that you 'give support to receive support'. More on how that works here.

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Can anxiety cause someone to become apathetic?

replies: 4

I saw the doctor about my horrible sleeping pattern. He asked me a few questions about what I think about when I try to sleep etc. He threw the word 'anxiety' around and said he wants to refer me to a psychologist before he makes a diagnoses. I have a few symptoms, the main ones being a loss of appetite, nausea and extreme mental fatigue (cant concentrate, memory problems etc). The symptom that has affected me the most is my lack of enthusiasm. I know it is really noticeable because other people have been telling me of recent that I seem 'unenthusiastic', and sometimes I just want to scream because deep inside I am enthusiastic but I dont have the energy to show it. This is really frustrating because I am losing friends because I just dont have the energy to have a proper conversation with them, which makes me feel anxious because they will then think im mad at them when really im not. So i just avoid that all together by staying inside. I also lost a job offer because I came across as 'uninterested', but I know that deep down I really wanted the job. Its really frustrating. I remember when everyone used to tell me how enthusiastic I was about life and now ive changed in so many ways because of whatever Is going wrong in my mind. The most annoying part is I have no idea where this came from, its just gradually gotten worse as time has gone by and now its so bad that im noticing its causing a problem. With all that being said, can anxiety cause someone to become apathetic or is that more related to depression?

can't share

replies: 5

i find it really hard to share things about myself, especially about my depression or anxiety stuff. its really hard when people ask if you're okay and you just really cant tell them but they wont let it go. i hate it when my teachers ask me why i was late or away and my only answer if "well i couldn't get myself out of bed this morning" but i cant actually say that i think im afraid of what people might say if they knew, most people don't understand. i wish i could find a way to be open about it without other people judging me or thinking im an attention seeker

Helping someone who doesn't want help

replies: 3

Hi, My wife has depression. She's seen a councillor and the councillor made her discuss some confronting stuff and also wasn't really easy to understand so my wife refuses to seek further help. She still reluctantly takes her medication after I go get it for her.I've called lifeline services and spoken to GP's but don't feel I am getting answers. There was a time when my mother in-law (wife's mother) and myself were suggesting things to help and it was too overwhelming and it caused her to go into a deeper depression. So between my mother in-law and me, we've decided that my mother in-law is just there for her and has general conversations and there to listen. I've agreed to tread lightly but be open to suggesting things in a gentle manner. We had a good week were we were able to get her to the GP and he suggested a book called Feeling Good by David Burns. I've downloaded it and started reading it. Yet my wife refuses to start the book because she thinks its going to be one of those american motivational speech books which I've assured her its not and explained its non-confrontational and so far the book has not asked me to think back into my past. It just explains depression and has ways to rethink or reassess the feelings you are having (CBT). I thought writing a post would be beneficial to get a range of ideas from people instead of just the help lines which I haven't had luck with so far.So has anyone out there got any ideas of how to get someone to help themselves when they refuse? Deep down I think she wants me to help. I know we can fix this as a team but we're lost as to how to get her to help herself. beyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636. Normal 0 false false false EN-AU X-NONE X-NONE /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0cm 5.4pt 0cm 5.4pt; mso-para-margin-top:0cm; mso-para-margin-right:0cm; mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt; mso-para-margin-left:0cm; line-height:115%; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi; mso-fareast-language:EN-US;}

Anxious about future and relationships.

replies: 4

Hi everyone, I'm pretty new and I wasn't quite sure where this belonged. I've been feeling really anxious for a long time now about being single. I'm 22 going on 23 at the end of the year, and I haven't had a relationship since I was 19 when I was with my first and last partner. We were together for seven months, but his high school sweet heart came back from teaching in France...so I was no longer needed. I was hurt over it for quite a while, understandably. For the past two weeks, I've been more anxious than I have ever been before, to the point where I'm finding it hard to concentrate or even enjoy my day without constantly worrying about finding someone. This came about because I found out that my ex is now engaged to the girl he cheated on me with. I can say that I have no feelings for him in that way anymore, but I still have that tinge of hurt and I'm actually more upset that he's obviously had this wonderful relationship and has taken the next step, while I have struggled to meet someone, and have had a bit of a rough time. I've been on dates, either I like them, they don't like me, or vice versa. I just haven't felt that click, and it doesn't help when I have friends and family who tell me to get a move on, that the clock is ticking, and comments like, ''the last one seemed like a nice guy, what was wrong with him?'' and ''you're too picky''. I don't think I am too picky, I just want someone that I like and don't see a point in settling.I've also noticed that pretty much all my friends are in relationships, and some of them are also getting engaged...and they're my age! I feel like I can't keep up. I realize it's not a race, but I would really love to meet someone nice and have a long term relationship. I feel like I've achieved a lot in these past three years, I'm ambitious, I work hard...heck I even worked hard at finding a job! (That was a real struggle back in 2013 because I didn't have much experience). I went back to study, redid my year 12, studied art, Education Support and next year I'll be at Uni, I'm friendly, I'm nice, I'm not a model, but I would say I'm attractive, I don't understand why it hasn't happened for me yet. I have tried. I have Tafe friends, go out places with them and a church community. Yet nothing. I suppose what I'm asking is, has anyone else been through this, or going through this? For those who have someone in their lives, how did you meet them? Did it just happen one day or did you somehow make it happen?

Progressively Getting Worse

replies: 4

Hey guys, so this is my first time ever doing something like this. I've read a lot of other stories and have related to most of what they have said. My life story is literally my life story if that makes sense. I never thought I would be the depressed type because I have been made fun of (in a funny way) that I am overdramatic, so I never took my depression seriously. I've recently been feeling more anxious at the most random of times and depressed, yet also somewhat excited/happy all at the same time. I don't know what is happening to me, but I've been crying a lot more lately and its freaking me out because I used to never cry while watching the notebook or sad movies. Silly example but applying this to my daily life I have also been dealing with these feelings when with my friends whether it be at social gatherings or one on one get togethers with family or friends. I want to be out socializing but once I am I find myself not wanting to be with whom ever I am with and I just want to be in my bed and cry myself to sleep. I don't even know where I should categorize myself when trying to google information on what might be happening to me. I just feel like I am going crazy and I used to blame these emotions on my period, but now its happening when I am not even on it. I talked to some friends and family and they had suggested over the counter mood enhancers. I guess the real question I want to be answered is, should I take this more seriously and go see a doctor or psychiatrist or should I just self-medicate with the mood enhancers from a pharmacy and see where it goes from there. I am also getting freaked out because I have been reflecting on my whole life and who I even am and its making me freak out even more. Any advice will honestly help. I feel like it was getting worse by months, but then that turned into weeks, and now i feel like its getting worse by days. Thanks for those of you who took the time to read this long thing. Again any advice would really help, I don't even know what to do. So lost. Thanks.

My boyfriend broke up with me because of his depression

replies: 3

To set the background to this story i have anxiety disorder and my boyfriend (ex) has depression. Basically my boyfriend has been ignoring me for a week now and hasn't been going to school or talking to any of his friends and our first conversation was him breaking up with me over the phone saying "It's not you its me, i need to focus on myself" when our relationship revolved around him but he hasn't been the same i've had him ignore me before but he would tell me "i need space" and i would wait until he was ready to talk. We had a party on the day we broke up and i had to get everyone at the party to persuade him to talk to me because before then he would run from me and even when we were talking i would have to chase him but i would try to talk to him and he would scream "leave me alone" but i know that he needs someone to vent to and i am so worried about him. I would reach to comfort him and he will grab my wrists, push me away, scream "don't touch me" and then start crying. It kills me to see him like this but i know he let his depression take over and my friends have told me that his depression broke up with me it wasn't him. He's not being himself, he's never been like this and i know he will regret breaking up with me because he's not himself but i'm so scared he's going to hurt himself because my anxiety makes me think of the worst outcome and he probably isn't going to turn up to school tomorrow and he isn't talking to me but i need to be there for him no matter how much he pushes me away because he's not liked by 98% of the grade because he tries too hard to be liked and can be mean. It is only me and his best friend that can help him. I think his depression made him break up with me and i want to give us another chance but i'm worried about him, i've never seen him this scary and upset. He was ready to punch me but instead he would go and punch a pole which would be dangerously close to me but i always put my feelings last, i want to make sure he's ok but i think i was too persistent in talking to him i don't know when he will come to school. So what can i do to help him? and is it true that his depression broke up with me and not him because he was happy and talking about how we were going to live together the night before he started ignoring me. So is it true? (i'm only 16 btw and he's 15)

am i just over reacting?

replies: 4

Okay so i have recently started to develop some symptoms of anxiety... I'm more thinking maybe social anxiety. I cant talk in front of crowds, i hate talking in front of class, i hate participating in sport, i don't like asking questions or asking for help and i don't like talking to people at shops or over the phone.... I also get really nervous if i have appointments or anything of that kind. I cant eat before them even if i know exactly what is going to happen. I also hate staying at other people houses... i think it has gotten worse in the last year because i use to love talking in front of people when i was younger I don't know if I'm just over reacting or if i really do have it...

problems with my parents.

replies: 7

gday everyone, my name is cameron and im looking for some advise. my parents split when i was 7 and ive been going between their houses since. my mum has pretty much no money and my dad has just over average wages. im 16 and have up till now been fine with swapping between each house fortnightly but my mum has made the choice to move to western Australia. that means im going to have to pick a house to live in permanently. now for the last few months mum and i have been fighting a lot and I've had to stay at dads because when ever i see her my mod goes right down to a depression level ( i havent been diagnosed with depression though) so i havent seen her as of late. if i go to mums house i will get a start at a new life in WA and would be able to move into my own flat and if i move to dads ill be able to keep my job and stay near my mates and help them out with stuff and stay in the same school. now theres too much crap going on on top of all that, that i cant fit into this. so i was wondering if anyone on here has had to pick a parent to live with full time and if you could tell me how you went about it and if you could offer any systems or something to make it easier. thanks

Friends or no Friends?

replies: 4

I don't know if its because of my depression or not but I have lost faith in humanity. I have lost trust in people and believe no one genuinely cares about another person. I have been hurt by people who call themselves my friends so many times that I rather just be by myself and avoid people so I can avoid getting hurt. I used to love social events but now I want to avoid any social situation that occurs to protect myself from getting hurt. Ever since my depression I have been more fragile more sensitive. Now I feel that friends are not real, I just want to stay distant from everyone. I don't know if I should but in the effort to making friends or keeping these people who are so called friends or should I just stay distant from everyone so I can protect my self from getting hurt?

I feel guilty

replies: 3

I feel guilty when I am sad. I feel like I am creating a burden and inconvienve for others. I Don't like feeling like this. I feel like shit today and I feel like nobody will hear me. I don't mean like my teacher told me off shit feeling. I mean sitting on the shower floor for 45 minutes watching the water trickle down the drain. That type of shit feeling. All I think about is how I'm pathetic. I almost want people to pity me which then makes me feel better. I used to see a school councilor but stopped because I felt she pitied me too much. My mum died when I was ten and not a day goes by when she doesn't cross my mind. Every day for six years I have thought about the woman who loved me. My mum. And she's dead. I have so many friends yet I feel so lonely. Every one sees a bubble, happy, loving girl when they look at me. I see a girl who is pitiful.

Eeep! When study is overwhelming! - Tips, ideas and coping strategies replies: 51

NEW TO THIS FORUM? Please read this first replies: 0

Can anxiety cause someone to become apathetic? replies: 4

can't share replies: 5

Helping someone who doesn't want help replies: 3

Anxious about future and relationships. replies: 4

Progressively Getting Worse replies: 4

My boyfriend broke up with me because of his depression replies: 3

am i just over reacting? replies: 4

problems with my parents. replies: 7

Friends or no Friends? replies: 4

I feel guilty replies: 3