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BeyondBlue New to this Forum? Please read this first!
  • replies: 0

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with tho... View more

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with those. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this is a space for younger people to connect and provide support for each other. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straight away. Information on moderation on the Forums can be found here. Being familiar with our Community Guidelines can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. If we have concerns about your wellbeing, one of our friendly moderators will check in with you privately to make sure you get the support you need. If you need more immediate support, we recommend reaching out to the following: Beyond Blue Support Service – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1300 22 4636 Headspace – between 9am and 1am (AEST), chat online to a mental health clinician or call 1800 650 890 Kids Helpline – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1800 55 1800 Thank you for being here. We’re glad you’ve found us here and hope this can be a supportive space for you Beyond Blue

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llamalover23 How will I make it through next semester?
  • replies: 7

Hi everyone. i start my second year of uni at the end of feb and I am terrified. Last year during the semester my depression got really bad. It would take me 5-6 hours to fall asleep at night, up to an hour to eat a piece of toast, 4-6 hours to get r... View more

Hi everyone. i start my second year of uni at the end of feb and I am terrified. Last year during the semester my depression got really bad. It would take me 5-6 hours to fall asleep at night, up to an hour to eat a piece of toast, 4-6 hours to get ready to go out. I didn’t shower for weeks, ate terribley, didn’t brush my teeth etc etc... I woke up each day in utter misery, wanting to sleep everytime I opened my eyes. I honestly do not think it could have got more severe, I nearly got hospitalised. i tried everything I possibly could to improve my mood. Increasing pleasurable activities, exercising, doing things for others, changing my diet, meditation, breathing exercises, journaling, art etc etc. i filled out dozens of worksheets, read books, downloaded all the apps, used all the e-therapies. None of it has made any changes to my mood, even after implementing these techniques for the better part of a year. i visited my local GP a few times, he prescribed a medication that did not work for me. I went back after a month because I was at a crisis point, he upped my dosage and told me to ‘take a walk in the sunshine’. Didn’t work. i visited my university counselling service 4 times, but I could only get an appointment once a month. I deteriorated so much during this time I was essentially told to leave because I was so bad and I needed more treatment than they could provide. i visited a university gp, but he didn’t really have any suggestions apart from taking a different medication. I would like to note that any physical cause of my depression has been ruled out through multiple blood tests. I struggled to find a good match for a local psychologist so I am now using the betterhelp app. I like my counsellor however as it is with online chat, progress is very slow and she hasn’t really made any new suggestions. i live in a beautiful house with a loving family, and I have little to no obligations or outside stresses, so that’s not the problem. please, I need some help. I’m not an idiot, if I don’t change SOMETHING, I’ll go back to the stress of uni and become a human slug again, or worse if you catch what I’m saying. Unfortunately I can’t do my degree online or part-time so that isn’t an option. Thanks

LDW I feel like I'm being destroyed and I don't know what to do
  • replies: 1

So, I guess I should explain myself. I'm a teenager, not going to specify how old, and I am recently finding everything overwhelming. I live with anxiety - in many forms, depression, PTSD, insomnia and an eating disorder than I am unsure the name of.... View more

So, I guess I should explain myself. I'm a teenager, not going to specify how old, and I am recently finding everything overwhelming. I live with anxiety - in many forms, depression, PTSD, insomnia and an eating disorder than I am unsure the name of. So, I'm the baby of the family. I have no siblings and am the youngest cousin, and I'm always told that I act older than I am. I find this anxiety enducing because I'm expected to act older than I am, and I'm hardly allowed to be my own age, and this is purely because I was forced to grow up far too fast. I'm unsure of my sexuality, and that causes more anxiety because I have absolutely no clue how my family or friends would react to me being anything but straight - but they aren't homophobic, some of them are part of the LGBTIQ+ community themselves. And my friend recently started talking to me about her own concerns, doubts, worries, thoughts and such and I want to be there for her, I really do, but my thoughts are getting to me and it feels like I'm drowning while everyone around me is breathing. But I can't turn my friend away, because she pretty much only trusts me, and I don't know what she would do if I told her that I needed space. She is such a kind girl and she doesn't deserve any of what she is going through and I would take it all if it meant she could be happy, but I can't, and it is that realization that destroys me most. Could I get some opinions, or maybe some advice for anxiety? Am I thinking about this too deeply? Should I suck it up, or turn my friend away? Should I try and find a way to block out the thoughts?

Mousey22 I keep changing my mind constantly, how do I fix this
  • replies: 2

This happens all of the time and it drives me nuts at times. I will have a different idea of what I want to do with my life and how to act in the morning, and then it will change in the afternoon or evening. Like, in regards to serious things such as... View more

This happens all of the time and it drives me nuts at times. I will have a different idea of what I want to do with my life and how to act in the morning, and then it will change in the afternoon or evening. Like, in regards to serious things such as what I want to do for a career, which sport I want to play, who I want to associate with, what my own personal interests are, etc. I can't figure out why I keep changing my mind about things and why I can't just stay focused on doing one or two things and keeping it that way. Do you have any advice on how to stop jumping from one extreme to the other?

Kiraxl Lost and alone
  • replies: 2

Hello this is my first post here, i usually don’t talk about these things or anything because im really ashamed and embarrassed The house that i live in that i have grown up in is the worst possible scenario housing style you can think of and i can’t... View more

Hello this is my first post here, i usually don’t talk about these things or anything because im really ashamed and embarrassed The house that i live in that i have grown up in is the worst possible scenario housing style you can think of and i can’t escape or move because its to expensive in my city and i dont trust or like anyone enough to move in with anyone else so i feel stuck i dont talk about it with anyone because its just so embarrassing i am so ashamed. The scenario is that the house i live in is disgusting. I live with my siblings and just my mum and they have an aray of mental problems, my mum bipolar, adhd also shes been a single mum, my sister who i fight with a lot shes just in general crazy and has a lot of mental problems and shes always out to get me and i also live with my brother but all he does is game and be a slob. We have 21 cats in a 1 bedroom house, ( they’re all looked after fed etc) because of my mother. She just keeps getting them she thinks that no one else can look after the strays in our area that they just come to us this has been going on for years but right now its at its peak. 21. Try living with 21 cats. The smell. The amount of money it costs. We have a really bad insect infestation that nothing can help unless we get it professionally fixed but where would all the cats go? They all live inside my mum refuses to let them out so i feel so stuck the house is an absolute mess. No one cleans anything, ive cleaned the bathroom and then my sister would come in and mess it up again along with everyone else adding to it. My house is like a trap - house but worse. We also have 5 dogs to add to all this mess. I have no money because every night i need to buy take out as i can’t cook in my house or even store anything due to the infestation I dont know what to do i cry all the time i just want a normal household i see people cry about being poor but they have a functional household !!! My family breaks everytjing every door in the house is smashed due to tantrums and windows are smashed im so sad i feel so exhausted and lonely i never want anyone to know about my lifestyle and i cant fix it myself because they will just mess it up again. I see no end I am really depressed over this and alone I just want to die i feel like im the only one in the world who has to put up with such a disgusting lifestyle sorry if this didnt make any sense it probably didn’t its very rushed but i am just so stuck and clueless

natsukashii Feeling weak and pathetic because you lack confidence
  • replies: 1

Hi! I need some support, so I will keep it brief. I always feel very socially anxious and panicky when I have to talk to others I don't usually talk to without a friend. I was meant to go to a study group tonight but I only go because my friend goes,... View more

Hi! I need some support, so I will keep it brief. I always feel very socially anxious and panicky when I have to talk to others I don't usually talk to without a friend. I was meant to go to a study group tonight but I only go because my friend goes, and she couldn't come. I know it must sound stupid, but I just can't be myself, and confident without someone else, I have really low self-esteem. But I don't know how to get rid of it. I have panic attacks because I just feel like I'm so self-conscious of how I act and how I talk when I'm in group and personal situations. My parents ask me why, and they often say on the lines of "you have to put in the effort to make friends". But I know that if I did go, I just couldn't! I would be almost paralysed with anxiety! It makes me feel so disappointed in myself when my parents say that, because I should be fine! Normal people are fine! It makes me feel pathetic and weak. How do I stop being like this? Any advice would help a lot Thankyouu

AnxiousS sad all the time
  • replies: 1

Hi everyone, Basically in the last few months my mental health has deteriorated to the worst it's ever been - I'm sad all the time, and when I'm not sad I'm constantly worried about my future and uni and just everything. I'm now at the point where I ... View more

Hi everyone, Basically in the last few months my mental health has deteriorated to the worst it's ever been - I'm sad all the time, and when I'm not sad I'm constantly worried about my future and uni and just everything. I'm now at the point where I can't see a future where I'm happy, and I don't know why I bother getting out of bed in the morning. I recently broke up with my boyfriend, and I definitely think my mental health played a large part in why I could no longer keep the relationship going, but obviously I have lost a big part of my support system in him. I find it really hard to talk about these things, and I have never had much luck with psychologists and I'm not sure I can put myself through it all again to come out with nothing on the other side. I also am not close to my family and can't talk about any of it with them. I honestly just don't know what to do anymore - every single day just sucks and I don't want to do anything anymore except sleep and cry. I'm also currently midway through the uni semester and at the point where I just don't know what to do. I'm really struggling with just not being able to bring myself to do the work, but at the same time, uni is the only thing getting me out of bed at the moment. Any advice would be appreciated

KB234 No study motivation doesnt faze me, and not in a good way
  • replies: 1

Hi! Im currently in my last year of uni and what should be my most stressful yet it feels like im not taking it seriously. For example, I had a report due at midnight that I had a week to do, and the entire day yesterday uninterrupted to complete it,... View more

Hi! Im currently in my last year of uni and what should be my most stressful yet it feels like im not taking it seriously. For example, I had a report due at midnight that I had a week to do, and the entire day yesterday uninterrupted to complete it, and still bare minimum is done. This isnt the first assignment where this has happened. Its like the due dates have turned into suggestions and not deadlines, I feel no particular stress towards the deadline because Ive let myself be okay with handing things late and cop the penalty which is affecting my grades when it shouldn't have to be this way. The hurdle has always been trying to start working/studying but now even after ive started maintaining that concentration for even 10 minutes is a strain and leads to an hours break. Im hoping to push through this week and use the long weekend to rest and reconsolidate, but and advice or tips to get my head moving in the right direction would help so much. Cheers! -KB

John_P where to from here?
  • replies: 14

Hello. I am feeling very lost. I try to hide it but i have been feeling like this for 2 years. 2 years ago my ex broke up with me. It was a shock and just left without any reasoning. That's usually cool, but we were about to get married and NO-ONE sa... View more

Hello. I am feeling very lost. I try to hide it but i have been feeling like this for 2 years. 2 years ago my ex broke up with me. It was a shock and just left without any reasoning. That's usually cool, but we were about to get married and NO-ONE saw the breakup coming. What is was left with was me blaming myself, but in reality it is probably nothing i could have done different. ( i tried my best and friends told me not to worry). As i moved states to live with her, my only network was her and her family and friends. I found it very hard to move on as i am a 1 woman man, and i just couldnt move back home as it meant closure. In the last 2 years i have had to fend for myself, i have become a womaniser-sleeping with a lot of woman and dating many women (where before-i was the sweet loyal fun loving boyfriend type) i have moved a couple of jobs, find it extremely hard to let people in as a friendship. I have developed an unhealthy habbit of looking up erotic material on the internet dailt. Over the past 8 months i am dating a girl that i really really like and she loves me. She is an angel and realy a catch but i am finding it hard to emotionally commit to her- (its complicated because she plans to move overseas for 2 years and then come back to be with me). In my alone time I cry relentlessly. I have emotional freak outs. My mind goes back in flashabacks to my failed relationship and all the people i lost whilst in that relationship. I have this constant throbbing in my head. I dont know weather to do a long relationship or just move back home with my friends and family? Also I dont know is wrong with my emotions, wellbeing-flashbacks- do i have PTSD? depression? I find it hard to see any positives in life despite my career success and this new amazing woman.

Whitepoppy61 I feel like a robot (not reacting in general, less emotions, no personality etc)
  • replies: 4

Hello again. I'm a year 12 who keeps to herself and focuses hard on studies. As of lately, I'm unable to react to social situations, entertainment or just anything that people say to me. I don't find joy in this stuff and lost interest in my old hobb... View more

Hello again. I'm a year 12 who keeps to herself and focuses hard on studies. As of lately, I'm unable to react to social situations, entertainment or just anything that people say to me. I don't find joy in this stuff and lost interest in my old hobbies (video games). These days, I'm studying hard, watching stuff or asleep. I can't even remember the last time I laughed genuinely (I smile politely or fake my laugh) As a result, people find me very awkward and boring or fake and so it became difficult to socialise with new people. Previously, I've been called out before for having no personality but dismissed it since I'm naturally quiet. However, I realised other quiet people react to stuff and have better social lives, which made me reflect upon myself. Now, I'm concerned that I'm incapable of reacting, having no personality and just having fewer emotions as a whole. This was a problem I always had but failed to notice it until HSC started. I believe this has happened since year 9 though, my old friends commented that I changed in that year. Examples of me not reacting: A person claimed my crush liked me and I replied with an "oh" (she even asked why I'm not reacting). Another example included a person talking to me about a problem of hers, in which I listened with a blank face (she even muttered 'that was boring'). In general, I don't react to videos or topics people try to talk about with me. The only topics I actively engage in would be HSC or school stuff (another reason why I feel like a robot, I mostly inform people) Since then, I've become super self-conscious about the way I converse with others which worsened my social anxiety (I was already shy and self-conscious). It came to the point that I even actively try to minimise my interactions with acquaintances, simply because I'm scared of being judged for my robotic type of personality. I have always been judged since chilehood for my introverted nature, I don't want to risk worsening their impressions of me. Sometimes, I ask my best friend for reassurance that I have a personality. He says I have a silent type of personality, but I feel like there's a deeper reason for this. I'm scared there's probably a mental issue hidden but it's honestly difficult to tell. Moreover, the way people judge me makes me feel like it's a huge flaw, which doesn't help my self-esteem at all. I'm sorry if this is all over the place, but I just wanted to voice out my thoughts and i'm feeling so confused about this.

Fee29 Stress, anxiety and depression breaking up my relationship
  • replies: 1

Hi, About a year ago my boyfriend and I decided to move in together. I was in a great place in my life and was happier than I had ever been. However, since moving in together I have been considerably unwell with various health problems. Over the past... View more

Hi, About a year ago my boyfriend and I decided to move in together. I was in a great place in my life and was happier than I had ever been. However, since moving in together I have been considerably unwell with various health problems. Over the past three or so months the health issues have been increasingly worse. I suffer with the constant worry and anxiety that I will be unwell at work, at a social event or even just at home and that it will start ruining my life. I am almost always in a constant state of pain and when I’m not I’m worrying that I going to be. On top of this, I have a very stressful job which requires me to be there a lot, have a lot of responsibilities and I don’t get the needed rest I require. My family lives in the uk so I also struggle with support and missing them. I have been diagnosed with severe anxiety and mild depression. My partner is not very sympathetic or empathetic and finds it hard to understand it all. I often get overly sensitive and upset over little things. My partner always threatens to break up with me and calls me crazy when I have an anxiety attack. He often sits there and tells me I’m losing the plot when I’m crying until I snap at him and he gets the chance to leave the conversation. I understand my anxiety, stress and depression affects him directly as he is living with me and I have just started reaching out for support and help. When we get into arguments, the increased stress often leads to my asthma getting worse, he acts like that I’m making my asthma get worse on purpose to get out of the argument and gets angry at me for having an asthma attack. He doesn’t see any of this as the effects of my declining mental health and rather than supporting me, is trying to tell me that we should just give up. I feel like he only wants me when I’m happy and anxiety free. I don’t understand how someone can be so intent on ending the relationship when only a day prior he was asking my dad for advice on where to take me for a surprise holiday.

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