Young people

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BeyondBlue New to this Forum? Please read this first!
  • replies: 0

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with tho... View more

Hey there! Welcome to the Young People section of the Beyond Blue Forums. The purpose of this section is to provide members aged 25 and under a space to discuss life issues, tricky situations and the difficult emotions and feelings that come with those. If you are aged over 25, please be mindful that this is a space for younger people to connect and provide support for each other. These forums are moderated, so your posts may not appear straight away. Information on moderation on the Forums can be found here. Being familiar with our Community Guidelines can help ensure that your posts appear online as quickly as possible. If we have concerns about your wellbeing, one of our friendly moderators will check in with you privately to make sure you get the support you need. If you need more immediate support, we recommend reaching out to the following: Beyond Blue Support Service – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1300 22 4636 Headspace – between 9am and 1am (AEST), chat online to a mental health clinician or call 1800 650 890 Kids Helpline – any time, chat online to a counsellor or call 1800 55 1800 Thank you for being here. We’re glad you’ve found us here and hope this can be a supportive space for you Beyond Blue

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John_P where to from here?
  • replies: 14

Hello. I am feeling very lost. I try to hide it but i have been feeling like this for 2 years. 2 years ago my ex broke up with me. It was a shock and just left without any reasoning. That's usually cool, but we were about to get married and NO-ONE sa... View more

Hello. I am feeling very lost. I try to hide it but i have been feeling like this for 2 years. 2 years ago my ex broke up with me. It was a shock and just left without any reasoning. That's usually cool, but we were about to get married and NO-ONE saw the breakup coming. What is was left with was me blaming myself, but in reality it is probably nothing i could have done different. ( i tried my best and friends told me not to worry). As i moved states to live with her, my only network was her and her family and friends. I found it very hard to move on as i am a 1 woman man, and i just couldnt move back home as it meant closure. In the last 2 years i have had to fend for myself, i have become a womaniser-sleeping with a lot of woman and dating many women (where before-i was the sweet loyal fun loving boyfriend type) i have moved a couple of jobs, find it extremely hard to let people in as a friendship. I have developed an unhealthy habbit of looking up erotic material on the internet dailt. Over the past 8 months i am dating a girl that i really really like and she loves me. She is an angel and realy a catch but i am finding it hard to emotionally commit to her- (its complicated because she plans to move overseas for 2 years and then come back to be with me). In my alone time I cry relentlessly. I have emotional freak outs. My mind goes back in flashabacks to my failed relationship and all the people i lost whilst in that relationship. I have this constant throbbing in my head. I dont know weather to do a long relationship or just move back home with my friends and family? Also I dont know is wrong with my emotions, wellbeing-flashbacks- do i have PTSD? depression? I find it hard to see any positives in life despite my career success and this new amazing woman.

Whitepoppy61 I feel like a robot (not reacting in general, less emotions, no personality etc)
  • replies: 4

Hello again. I'm a year 12 who keeps to herself and focuses hard on studies. As of lately, I'm unable to react to social situations, entertainment or just anything that people say to me. I don't find joy in this stuff and lost interest in my old hobb... View more

Hello again. I'm a year 12 who keeps to herself and focuses hard on studies. As of lately, I'm unable to react to social situations, entertainment or just anything that people say to me. I don't find joy in this stuff and lost interest in my old hobbies (video games). These days, I'm studying hard, watching stuff or asleep. I can't even remember the last time I laughed genuinely (I smile politely or fake my laugh) As a result, people find me very awkward and boring or fake and so it became difficult to socialise with new people. Previously, I've been called out before for having no personality but dismissed it since I'm naturally quiet. However, I realised other quiet people react to stuff and have better social lives, which made me reflect upon myself. Now, I'm concerned that I'm incapable of reacting, having no personality and just having fewer emotions as a whole. This was a problem I always had but failed to notice it until HSC started. I believe this has happened since year 9 though, my old friends commented that I changed in that year. Examples of me not reacting: A person claimed my crush liked me and I replied with an "oh" (she even asked why I'm not reacting). Another example included a person talking to me about a problem of hers, in which I listened with a blank face (she even muttered 'that was boring'). In general, I don't react to videos or topics people try to talk about with me. The only topics I actively engage in would be HSC or school stuff (another reason why I feel like a robot, I mostly inform people) Since then, I've become super self-conscious about the way I converse with others which worsened my social anxiety (I was already shy and self-conscious). It came to the point that I even actively try to minimise my interactions with acquaintances, simply because I'm scared of being judged for my robotic type of personality. I have always been judged since chilehood for my introverted nature, I don't want to risk worsening their impressions of me. Sometimes, I ask my best friend for reassurance that I have a personality. He says I have a silent type of personality, but I feel like there's a deeper reason for this. I'm scared there's probably a mental issue hidden but it's honestly difficult to tell. Moreover, the way people judge me makes me feel like it's a huge flaw, which doesn't help my self-esteem at all. I'm sorry if this is all over the place, but I just wanted to voice out my thoughts and i'm feeling so confused about this.

Fee29 Stress, anxiety and depression breaking up my relationship
  • replies: 1

Hi, About a year ago my boyfriend and I decided to move in together. I was in a great place in my life and was happier than I had ever been. However, since moving in together I have been considerably unwell with various health problems. Over the past... View more

Hi, About a year ago my boyfriend and I decided to move in together. I was in a great place in my life and was happier than I had ever been. However, since moving in together I have been considerably unwell with various health problems. Over the past three or so months the health issues have been increasingly worse. I suffer with the constant worry and anxiety that I will be unwell at work, at a social event or even just at home and that it will start ruining my life. I am almost always in a constant state of pain and when I’m not I’m worrying that I going to be. On top of this, I have a very stressful job which requires me to be there a lot, have a lot of responsibilities and I don’t get the needed rest I require. My family lives in the uk so I also struggle with support and missing them. I have been diagnosed with severe anxiety and mild depression. My partner is not very sympathetic or empathetic and finds it hard to understand it all. I often get overly sensitive and upset over little things. My partner always threatens to break up with me and calls me crazy when I have an anxiety attack. He often sits there and tells me I’m losing the plot when I’m crying until I snap at him and he gets the chance to leave the conversation. I understand my anxiety, stress and depression affects him directly as he is living with me and I have just started reaching out for support and help. When we get into arguments, the increased stress often leads to my asthma getting worse, he acts like that I’m making my asthma get worse on purpose to get out of the argument and gets angry at me for having an asthma attack. He doesn’t see any of this as the effects of my declining mental health and rather than supporting me, is trying to tell me that we should just give up. I feel like he only wants me when I’m happy and anxiety free. I don’t understand how someone can be so intent on ending the relationship when only a day prior he was asking my dad for advice on where to take me for a surprise holiday.

ROSEEM im sad
  • replies: 1

Today at uni a conversation triggered me and now i am feeling blank and emotionless. I do not want this to spiral into one of my depressive episodes. I am already on antidepressants and see a psychologist, just looking for something motivating or tho... View more

Today at uni a conversation triggered me and now i am feeling blank and emotionless. I do not want this to spiral into one of my depressive episodes. I am already on antidepressants and see a psychologist, just looking for something motivating or thought provoking so i don't spend the next month in bed.

Aye I feel like I'm about to lose everything
  • replies: 2

At the start of last year, I felt like I had everything together. I had a good job that made me proud to tell people about, I had just moved in with my now finace. I had everything I wanted more or less. After 5 months I injured my knee working (door... View more

At the start of last year, I felt like I had everything together. I had a good job that made me proud to tell people about, I had just moved in with my now finace. I had everything I wanted more or less. After 5 months I injured my knee working (door to door charity sales, aka alot of walking) so I had to stop as there wasnt a position open for someone who couldn't walk everyday. Then I had to move because of a dodgy Geelong landlord. But it was okay, I just gotten engaged. My life was still pretty awesome. That was july of last year. The 10 months haven't been kind. I've tried everything trying to get a job, and I know people will say "oh not everything" But yes, everything. I've walked around town handing out resumes, I've applied to every job I could do online (on every job board website), I've asked every family member and friend, I've even offered to work for free to some places. And that has been nearly every day of those 10 months. And I know that isn't the be all and end all. But it's starting to be. I can't get out of the house because I have no money, I can't afford rent sometimes, my partner has told me to my face I'm poison because me notting getting a job is affecting her so much that she relapsed on her depression and she's spiralling in one of the most important years of her life. She can't move back into her parents place for reason I can't quite say but she tells me alot she feels trapped and scared that she will end up hating me soon. I mean, I have friends places I can go to and all, but I'm, for the better part, stuck in a lease. She tells me "get a job" but for an indian guy (WHO MIND YOU, WAS BORN HERE AND LIVED HERE MY WHOLE LIFE) with a minor knee disability, it's damn near impossible. Every interview I even get, there are 200+ applications and no matter how confident or outgoing and willing I am to any interviewer, I still don't get a second round. So I'm stuck, real stuck. And I'm about to lose everything I have. It's my fault, and there's not even anything I can do to stop it. I know this isn't really the place to ask, but what can I do..? I feel so utterly dejected and hate myself for just being. Its gotten to the point where every morning I wake up and feel like walking until I just drop. I don't know what to do and I'm so lost.

Ellie_B Sexually nervous
  • replies: 2

HI. Im only 18 and just started uni, living on campus. I have only ever kissed boys before and there is such a huge expectation at uni and it makes me feel pressured. I am attracted to lots of guys but whenever a guy shows interest i get so nervous a... View more

HI. Im only 18 and just started uni, living on campus. I have only ever kissed boys before and there is such a huge expectation at uni and it makes me feel pressured. I am attracted to lots of guys but whenever a guy shows interest i get so nervous and turn them down. I want a boyfriend and to do stuff with guys but don't know why I get so fridget. I am nervous I don't know what I am doing but people say everything gets better with experience. ideas anyone?

Arose I feel numb
  • replies: 1

Hi, i was with this guy on and off for over a year and then he started to talk to one of my best friends and they started dating. It’s now been a year since that all happened and they have broken up and he started talking to me again. We had sex and ... View more

Hi, i was with this guy on and off for over a year and then he started to talk to one of my best friends and they started dating. It’s now been a year since that all happened and they have broken up and he started talking to me again. We had sex and now he acts like I don’t even exist and a part of me still wants him even though he has walked all over me and used me. I feel so empty and sad.

Arose Do I have a mental disorder?
  • replies: 2

I feel all of this: sadness, anger, apathy, euphoria, lost & Lonley, loss of interest in everything, irritability, risk-taking behaviours (frequently using drugs and alcohol to numb pain), disorganised behaviour, aggression, agitation, crying, unwant... View more

I feel all of this: sadness, anger, apathy, euphoria, lost & Lonley, loss of interest in everything, irritability, risk-taking behaviours (frequently using drugs and alcohol to numb pain), disorganised behaviour, aggression, agitation, crying, unwanted thoughts, lack of concentration, racing thoughts, difficulty falling asleep, struggling to wake up no motivation to do anything except for partying im not sure if I’m just sad or if I have something wrong with me and I want to be tested and I want to see a physiologist but I cant talk to my mum about any of this someone please help can I go get tests done without having to get my mum involved straight away???

Guest312 Anxiety(?). Please, help
  • replies: 2

I don't really want to be a bother to anyone, but I really need to talk right now. So here goes nothing. It might not be as bad as what others have to go through, but I just can't fall asleep until it's about 3 or 4 in the morning. I sometimes don't ... View more

I don't really want to be a bother to anyone, but I really need to talk right now. So here goes nothing. It might not be as bad as what others have to go through, but I just can't fall asleep until it's about 3 or 4 in the morning. I sometimes don't sleep at all. Whenever I do try, I always panic, and/or think of trivial things, that have no relation whatsoever, but there's always a pit in my stomach, telling me something's going to go wrong. There are times at school where I get to class a little late, and I get so nervous about interrupting something important, or putting myself in a position where others might judge me, that I freeze, and just awkwardly stand outside the door. A lot of the times, I actually go to sick-bay, because I end up crying outside. I panic a lot when people ask me where I've been if I've been to the toilet, or been called out by the teacher to do something, and I don't work well with pressure on me. My mum booked an appointment with the GP the other day, because she said that I was being "simply ridiculous", but whenever the GP tried to ask me a question, my mother would just answer for me. I found it really difficult to deal with, and when I told my mum I was trying to tell the doctor how I really felt, she told me to be quiet, and that I didn't understand what was going on. In the end, the doctor just brushed it off, and whenever I did answer a question myself, my mother would say something like "That's not right! You feel/act like ____". I feel like my mum doesn't really understand how I feel in general. I found out a teacher had told my mum that I needed a little bit of emotional support, and my mother scolded me when I got home, telling me that I just being a pushover, and that I should spend more time on my studies. I would talk to my dad, but I don't think he'd be much better. After my mum had told him what had happened, he seemed to be in a sour mood. He was really angry at me, for no apparent reason, and while he was shouting at me to work faster, he suddenly burst into tears. He told me that there was no way that I was having a worse time then him, as "(he has) to work at a sh*tty job, with sh*tty people, anyway, (I) shouldn't be sad, because there's no reason for (me) to be!" Afterward, he just continued crying, before I tried to comfort him and calm him down. If anyone could give me any advice, it would be amazing. I wish I knew what to do. I'm sorry for wasting everyone's time anyway...

RoseyAlexa New Here - Would love some advice
  • replies: 2

Hi All... I'm Alex. So, I'm 14 and have a very privileged life. I go to a good school, have some friends, etc... But I often am really sad for a lot of reasons. My friends say they're going to be there for me but then when I go to my best friend for ... View more

Hi All... I'm Alex. So, I'm 14 and have a very privileged life. I go to a good school, have some friends, etc... But I often am really sad for a lot of reasons. My friends say they're going to be there for me but then when I go to my best friend for help and tell her my issues and why I'm upset she completely ignores me and doesn't respond - I felt really hurt because I'd been there for her for so long. She's also been spending a lot more time with new friends (people who used to bully her) than me and i guess it just kinda hurts. My community is very respectful of the LGBTQIA+ community but I think I like my friend *a lot* and i honestly don't know what to do about it because she has a crush on another girl at my school. Also my mum doesn't have a job and helps me a lot and I'm extremely grateful for her but she tries to control everything I do in regards to my schoolwork and it almost seems like she's trying to live through me. She's also verbally and sometimes a bit physically abusive (in my opinion) when we fight, and I know she loves me but I think shes menopausal and almost seems bipolar (athough I wouldn't know). She makes me not want to come home sometimes and I feel like a traitor writing this because she's been there for me etc but idk. I'm really sorry if this just comes off as the bratty whinings of a middle class highschooler - I realise people have A LOT more serious problems than mine but I thought I'd give sharing a go. I'd love any kind of advice/response! - Alex x