hello Betterlife, I've just seen your post and I'm so sorry to know of your circumstances because you're in a difficult position here.
There are a few issues that you have to address which you have mentioned, so to self medicate using alcohol and smoking pot is only putting a bandaid on your situation, because the next day it will still be there, this is how the cycle begins, to drink and smoke to pretend it is all OK.
What you need to do is work out how much money you need per week, to pay for rent, utilities, food, and 'just in case' where you can have money to access if you need it and put the rest into a Xmas account, or an account where two signatures need to be signed before money is withdrawn and get your work to put that money into the Xmas a/c when you know how much you will need.
This can be done but it needs a little determination.
With your depression and anxiety will require you to contact your doctor and ask them if they do house calls, or perhaps there maybe someone who goes out for you that can come with you to an appointment, because once all of this can be handled with medication and counselling then your alcohol/smoking intake may ease off. Geoff.
