Unsure

[Unsure2017]

Hi,

I'm very unsure what's going on, I'm not suicidal by all means but I do get low and find it hard to get back into a good mood, I often get anxious if I don't get invited to things even though I know I can't always be invited to things. I get anxious to make plans due to not wanting to miss out on things because I feel fun times at home with my housemates (or plans to go out) are often made when I have already got plans meaning I feel like I'm the odd one out. I often express my opinions and get told you're over thinking it or you're just depressed( I don't any official diagnosis) even if it is an often occurrence. What should I do?

[Starwolf]

Hi Unsure, welcome to the forums.

You are right, there is a significant difference between feeling anxious, a passing state and being affected by anxiety, a mental condition. The fact that you are asking yourself where you stand means that you feel there my be cause for concern. Well done for finding the courage to look into this.

We're all different so feeling like the odd one out is not necessarily a reason to be concerned. Sometimes embracing our differences will be enough.

I'd suggest you do the K10 test (top left of this page in the Facts section). Then read the info re anxiety and depression. It doesn't replace proper diagnosis but will help give you a better idea of what you may be up against.

If results concern you, please do not hesitate to book a GP appointment for an open, honest talk about the way you feel. You may need referral to a counselor or to go on medication to help you reclaim some peace of mind and quality of Life. No need to feel embarrassed. Mental/emotional conditions are medical conditions. They have nothing to do with weakness or a flawed personality.

Meanwhile, you could research coping strategies to take the edge off overthinking. Like mindfulness, relaxed breathing, relaxed Body Scan. Smiling Mind and Buddhify are helpful apps.

Let us know how you go...

[Ken1]

Hi Unsure,

Do you know what exactly it is that puts you in a low mood? Can you identify any trends or even start looking for trends? Could be possible that it's nothing at all - that you just feel low all of a sudden.

I totally understand feeling anxious if not invited to things. To my, anxiety and anxious feelings beg to seek approval, be liked and be noticed! Not saying those are YOUR characteristics, but if anxiety were a person, I reckon they'd be some of anxiety's characteristics.

Do you think you could encourage yourself to be flexible about your social life? Make plans when you want or don't make plans but do it for you and do it spontaneously because otherwise your brain can get too attached to things that don't matter so much!

Many people I find like to throw labels around - you hear it all the time, "I am OCD about this,", "You're just depressed,", "You're retarded,". I hate it! There's no basis to what they're saying, as there's no basis to people telling you you're overthinking or depressed, unless they're a) a medical professional or b) genuinely concerned for you.

I would also suggest doing the K10 test to allow yourself to see if there's maybe something going on. If all else fails, it never hurts to go visit a counsellor, even just for one session.

Bonnie