Testicular disorder infertility

[C_h_w]

Hi I don't know if I should be here or even bother trying to talk to any one about testicular disorder anymore but I will try well when I was born there were complications but we're we were at time didn't look into it more so mum dad me ended up moving to South Australia bye one and a half the doc's decided to finally do something but both of my testies had to be removed and on going check ups but no extra test to find out why I have had to dill with alot of let down one being realising at sex ed that I was never going to be a father fill all alone the amount of bulling I coped at school shoold have put me in a hole already but I'm still trying to get my self out but I fill like I'm having to dill with alot of other things that aren't getting looked into bye the doc's proply fill like just a number a bull you castrat and send back of out into the paddock

I'm 33 now and still just as confused as what I was ment to be having to get injection ever 6 weeks is not fun fill like
I'm not ment to have a lady in my life
A borden
Not good enough
A proplem interference to work
Walked over
Talked done to
Worthless
Not herd
Disposable
Taken out of contents
Diagnosed incorrectly

I just don't now if I should keep trying to seek help or just give up as Google never helps

[C_h_w]

Hi matchy69 yes I do fill as if I have a moment a day were things try to flood back in I try to but in the back of my mind and move on with the day but some times it just gets abit to much for example I love working on cars when taking car for a test drive and look back and see baby set's in car or even a child and you can't be explain to people what got you down as they could take things wrong way plus things happens when I was around 10 mum's X took her to tas and the prick made me stay with my ungrateful so called nan that neglected my doc appointment and my medicals. I am going to try and weight down what has happened to me from the pegging and try and get it in order witch will be hard as there is alot I don't want to remember and I don't remember alot primary school

[Matchy69]

Hi C h w I can understand things that can trigger.I have things that trigger me as well and they can make you feel from just being sad to really depressed and can effect the rest of the day.And you can' avoid the triggers they just happen.

That would have been hard when your mother left you with your nan and sounds like she didn't want you there and neglected you badly and that has caused long term effects on you.Did you still see your mother after that?How was it if you did see her?

My memories of school both primary and high school was of me being constantly bullied and going home in tears.Kids can be so cruel just because you look or talk differently your are looked at like your a freak.

Take care,

Mark.

[C_h_w]

It was hard being left behind but I feel I never blamed mum. I had quit afew brake downs at school I think they were over missing the parents and not getting the help I needed mum didn't want me there with nan but the X was abusive to mum I am proud of mum for courage she pulled out of the bags to lev that ########## . Mum did show up after like 7 years I think it was things weren't good well mum was still with him so even as young as I was at time I could watch mum get hurt anymore after rocking up bulling her eyes out with new sister in arms so i said not nan she still trying to say it was her that organised it. I said if I can organise it with family to come and get you away from him yes was the reply so I organised my real dad and friends of family to go get mum because of abusive relationship things weren't the best from then but started to mend there were times were weren't able to keep intuch only in the last few years we have finally fix the bridge and mum lives with me now and she fills some of my payen and fills she should let abit out

Mum here yes I have always felt the pain and I wish I had been there for Chris when he needed me. As my so called mother and my X and his so called X had desired money over family I was never allowed money and I was never left alone.my mother had treated myself and my brother the same as she had treated Chris and that I am ashamed of and can never change and I wish I could.

[Matchy69]

Hi Chris.We all make mistakes and your mother suffered to and would have been painful for her as well as you.That is the past and it great that she is in your life now and that you both can start afresh.Their is a special bond that a mother has with their child no matter what age and you can sort out some of the past and have strong relationship.The part of the healing process is forgiveness .

Take care,

Mark.