Returning to work after a nervous breakdown

[Bec860]

I’m new to this site and looking for guidence. Three weeks ago I had a nervous breakdown. The signs of the build up were there well before it happened, I’ve always suffered from anxiety and bouts of depression, but managed to keep them hidden. I am a manager of 2 busy hairsalons and I am a single mum to 2 children, my eldest son has Dyspraxia and ADHD. In the past two years I worked completely through my marriage breakup and many other emotional experiences, always having to put a mask on my face. My breaking point was a text message from my boss getting angry at me for leaving an aircon at work on (he New I left in a dizzy as I got a call saying my house had been broken into.) from that moment, everything I had been holding in came out, I cried for 3 days straight, I could barely get out of bed. My partner took me to see a doctor who diagnosed me with sever anxiety and depression and put me on 4 weeks stress leave with a mental health plan. I have also been seeing a psychologist. I have been feeing ok some days, and then yesterday I was a mess again. The last two nights I’ve barely slept as I am stressed about going back to work next week, I work face to face with customers and I can’t hide how I’m feeling right now. I also don’t want to even look at my employers, I have worked for them for 12 years and they have not been the kindest over my leave. I don’t know how to do this and get back into my old life, I don’t know how I ended up so fragile and broken.

[Peppermintbach]

Hi Bec860,

I hope that I can offer a gentle and reassuring welcome to you to the forums.

I read your post thinking, “wow, you’ve had one thing happen after the next.” You’re clearly going through a lot and you sound so very tired, overwhelmed, on edge and feeling unappreciated by employers. The stress and pressure that you’re feeling must be so intense...

Perhaps, if you don’t mind some suggestions, you could consider coming up with some coping strategies for your return to work. It’s just that sometimes I find planning ahead helps e.g. if you think you might feel really anxious at work then plan ahead to make a short trip to the bathroom so you can have some privacy (but just don’t stay in there forever) when you feel overwhelmed.

In the long term though, I feel perhaps you might want to consider looking for employment elsewhere. This environment sounds toxic for your mental health and I feel you deserve so much better. To work in a much more supportive environment with respectful and appreciative employers.

On another note, I admire your courage in reaching out for help from your psychologist, following through with the advice to take some leave for your mental health and reaching out here. It’s not easy to ask for help so well done...

I hope we hear from you again but there’s no pressure...only if you would like to talk some more.

Caring thoughts,

Pepper