Older Single mum of toddler -so very lonely

[Good_person]

I’m an older single mum and weekends I’m incredibly lonely . I keep busy taking my beautiful child to swimming , dancing , parks etc but although we are happily together I’m incredibly lonely. My mums group are all married and couples and much younger than me, and I’m just a few years younger than their mums. weekends I’m not invited anywhere as people do family things

I now work full time and my family lives a long way away , so not support . My friends are out and about travelling and dating so they have drifted off , but I may get the odd call.

I put on a happy face for my child and always seem upbeat for her, taking her places and doing activities but I’m feeling so lonely .

Nobody wants to hang out with us 😞

[Yana8216]

Hello Good Person 🙂
I'm so lonely too. My partner works away and is away more than home lately. Most of the time it's just me & the dog. Very grateful for the dog, but it's not the same as adult human company! I'm part of a church community but socialise very little outside of church. I feel like people are so busy now with work, family, chores at home etc.
I'm quite shy and don't have much self confidence so I don't often approach people to organise social catch ups, how do you go with this?

[Good_person]

Hi and thanks for replying

Im sorry to hear your so lonely too ;( dogs are great company.

I just take my child out and focus on what we are doing. I hardly mix or even look at other parents or people as my confidence has declined a lot .

Socially I would go to things but can only be daytime, I don’t get invited 😞

I just joined a church group but not overly keen ,but love the people there, and my child loves it.

[Doolhof]

Hi Good Person and Yana,

I would like to welcome both of you to the community here. I'm wondering if either of you have hobbies or interests you could expand on?

A few years ago we moved to a new area and I found it difficult to break into the community to meet people. I do have a husband so I am not in your situation, but do understand what it is like trying to make new friends and to feel like you fit in.

Good Person, I realise you are working so that may limit some of the time and opportunities you may have to meet people. I'm wondering if either of you have time for a volunteer role somewhere? Good Person, you may be able to find some place you can take your child as well.

Depending on where you are living, places like libraries sometimes hold groups and activities.

Children and dogs are often very welcome in an Aged Care facility as well. Some places have numerous volunteers.

Groups can sometimes feel a little daunting, I try to tell myself I will make the most out of the experience.

Ask the people at the Church groups if they can recommend other places where you might be able to join in. They may also be able to make suggestions of where you could spend Christmas with people if you are usually alone then.

Wishing you both all the best.

Cheers from Dools

[Good_person]

Thank you x

Im always trying but need and have my little one me always

[Doolhof]

Hi Good Person,

It sounds like you work hard to balance everything out, to try to make life as good as it can be for your child and yourself.

I mentioned Aged Care as I volunteer in one and see how much it means to the residents when people bring their children in. It does not matter if they know the child or not, the people's faces light up.

You and your toddler may be able to be involved in a volunteer position somewhere, even if it is just a couple of hours a month.

It may be a way to meet new people.

This is just a thought, not something you need to do.

Wishing you and your child happiness and new opportunities to connect.

Cheers from Dools