Newbie :Introducing me.

[Ghosty]

Hello all. It is good to find a website/forum where one can discuss mental health issues without fear or judgement.

Me: I am a middle aged female who has lived with episodic (endogenous) major depression since my early 20's. Some episodes I endured untreated others via medication through a psychiatrist or gp etc...... Have never been hospitalised for it though - touch wood! I guess after having lived with it for such a long time I am well aware of the 'monster' I have been dealing with too well. I hope I can be a support to some people in the way of understanding too.

Life has been good to me over the last 2 years and I have no real complaints. My only issue is surviving the 'morning horrors'. I'm in a relatively new job where I need to awake at 3.30am to get there. What I mean by 'morning horrors' is waking up desiring death and being in the foulest of moods etc....... Any way I know I cannot change my shift or change jobs else will have to find another job and risk being unemployed (my employer is not that flexible & understanding). I also know that this dark morning mood can/has been triggered by an unusual daily sleep pattern. My mood usually improves by around 11am. Any ideas on how to deal with this without having to risking a worsening mood and possible unemployment? With thanks & appreciation.

[startingnew]

HI Ghosty

while im not in the same situation as you, i understand the monring monsters. the anxiety is often high and i ahvent really found anything that helps me except for to ride it out and get into a morning routine.

maybe you pick something that you get or can do before you get to work that you enjoy to help pick up your mood...? for example get a hot chocolate from maccas or something on the way to work..

[Peppermintbach]

Hi Ghosty,

Your mornings sound absolutely horrendous; it's definitely a rough way to start the day. I'm afraid that I don't really have any advice but I can empathise. I used to love mornings but now I hate mornings mostly because I dread facing the day. I have to drag myself out of bed each morning when most of the time, I wish that I could just sleep the rest of my life away.

Kind thoughts,

Pepper

[Anton_]

Hello Ghosty,

Thank you for sharing your story. It is a good start that you recognise that your sleep pattern can be triggering your dark mood at night. This is very common as sleep deprivation can have a significant effect on our mood. The more we change sleep patterns the bigger the impact on our mood and especially if we already experience symptoms of depression.

I like how you make the point about your employer not being understanding. This can cause more stress and anxiety.

Have you tried light therapy? This is a new method that works with people that experience symptoms of depression when it is dark and people who experience Seasonal Affective Disorder. Please read the article below so you can understand the impact and use of light therapy:

http://sleephub.com.au/light-therapy/

A pair of glasses that use blue-green wavelengths increases energy and mood if you wear them as soon as you wake up and stay with them for a while. Talk to your GP or a sleep specialist (contact the website) so they can guide you through this.

I hope this helps.

Anton