Hello everyone. As the title suggests, this is my first post here, and actually my first step to openly seeking help. I'm a 38 y.o. male who has often struggled with anxiety, and (I think) perhaps even led me to mild depression. And to be honest I've never properly addressed these issues, simply just tried to tough them out or addressed them myself. Which I know is not the best way to go about it.
Just to preface, I feel like my problems aren't huge compared to what others may be suffering, but just lots of small problems piling up and not handled properly. During my 20s and early 30s I'd struggle with social anxiety and low self esteem. Endlessly worrying about things which I should just be able to handle. Not being comfortable in my own skin and often feeling like I should be something else that I'm clearly not.
Over the past few years (approx. 5) - once I could admit to myself that I was suffering from mental health issues, I have been slowly trying to improve my overall health & wellbeing. It hasn't been a sudden life changing decision, or huge sudden shift in my overall attitude, but a slow, often gruelling process to try and pull myself out of the hole I was once in. A lot of it you could notch up to growing up and experience. Slowly getting comfortable and accepting who I was, knowing what I was capable of, when to challenge myself and when to walk away.
But this year has been a rough one, and I feel like all of that hard work over the past few years has just been undone in one fel swoop. And most of it stemmed from events that were out of my control. Without going into too much detail - it has been a very stressful year at work, quite possibly more than any of the 12 years I've been here. I've also been suffering from a series of physical injuries, which I just can't seem to recover from. On top of this my mum is shorting going into surgery to remove a portion of her lung - which is my current huge concern.
Over the course of this year I've found myself mentally slipping back into 'the bad place', and will continue to with no end in sight. I'm now at the point where I just feel so fragile. Even silly little trivial things are giving me anxiety episodes. I feel like I'm slipping and back to a hopeless place, and I don't know how I'm going to get back out again.
Just thought I would share if anyone has been through a similar experience.
