My introduction

[Ronzky]

Hi, I'm a male in early 30s. I feel sad most of the time and I need someone who would listen and help me see life more positively. I'm gay and hasn't opened up to anyone except to my close friends who live in a different country. I work full time and I'm afraid this sadness is affecting my performance.

[Bluey_moon]

Hi and welcome to BB!

I'm would love to listen as would many of the other people on the BB forum! 

Firstly, could it be benificial to see your GP and tell them how you are feeling? 

Do you have any friends or family closer that you could confide in? 

Do you know what I do when I'm feeling sad, I write a list of all the good and positive things in my life! 

What sort of work do you do? 

What do you like to do when you're not working? 

Please stay in touch with us! 

[Guest_1055]

Hey Ronzky

 Here is a hug for you in hope you may feel comforted or something. I'm so sorry you feel sad most of the time.

Please feel free to write anything you want here, when you are ready. I hope you will be OK.

With love to you

Shelley xx

[Starwolf]

Hello  Ronzky,

Chronic sadness  is an uncomfortable head space to be in. Many of us here can relate to how uncomfortable it feels... and to the wish to get the hell out of there.

I have had a lot of exposure to the gay world although -in spite of experimenting with it in my youth- I am more asexual than homosexual. As a woman, I have enjoyed the company of gay men and can relate to where gay women (also transsexuals) are at. I have met great people among them. Sexual inclination has of course nothing to do with either good or flawed character. It doesn't define who/what a person is in other areas of life.

I have had many open, intelligent conversations regarding self-acceptance, the difficulties of coming out of the closet and those involved in  staying there, the struggles and courage it all takes. From these open-hearted exchanges, it transpired that self-acceptance was the necessary first step of this journey.

There are groups dealing with the issues you face. I feel it would be a good place to start. You will find there advice, support, understanding and a non-judgmental approach. BB can point you in the right direction. If you scroll down to the bottom of the page, you will find the relevant section.

Best wishes and a cyber hug.

[Ronzky]

Thank you for the hug Shelly! It made me smile and somehow I felt some comfort in my chest. 

I will definitely come here often to likewise help other people feel that somebody cares.

[Ronzky]

Hi Starwolf,

Thank you for sharing your view about gay men. I do agree with you that sexual preference is not the only thing that defines character.

I was raised in a conservative Christian family and until now even when I'm already 30+, I still feel that my family would find it difficult to accept my sexual preference, especially my mom who I love so much - I don't want to hurt her. As for my own self, I have long accepted what I am and I am fine with it.

 I will browse through this website and look in particular for the group that focuses on the same issue that I have. I am really glad to finally have some outlet where I could just be free to talk about things that bother me.

Thank you once again, Starwolf!

Hugs, Ronzky.

[Starwolf]

Thanks for your kind words, Ronzky.

I can understand that your family's conservative background and your unwillingness to hurt your Mum make things difficult for you...although a mother's love is mostly unconditional. I know quite a few sons and daughters who have been pleasantly surprised when they took the plunge and had a careful, private conversation with their Mum.

You of course are the only judge as to what the best approach is for yourself and your family. The love you feel for them, combined with the acceptance of who and what you are will sooner or later find the solution which suits you and them best.

You have taken the first courageous step by reaching out. Well done !