Losing dad

marian jane
Community Member
I lost my dad to prostate cancer which metastasized to bone cancer nearly 2 years ago. When he was diagnosed it was already widespread throughout his body. I spent 7 months living with him from home to palliative care. I still feel angry and sad about the way he died. When I'm in certain circumstances - like a recent visit to hospital I feel sad and teary. If I see someone dying on tv etc. I find it very hard to watch and sometimes I'll leave the room. I know dealing with grief takes time and I just go along with these feelings not trying to supress them or justify them. I just get tired of feeling like this sometime
5 Replies 5

white knight
Community Champion
Community Champion

Hi, welcome

Yes, very normal reactions to grief.

Channeling grief is the only other aid to the process.

Writing, poetry, planting a garden bed in his honour, listening to YouTube videos like

Maharaji Prem Rawat sunset youtube

poetry eg

DADS FEET

Dad knew I wished to follow

in his footsteps

through my pride and boyish whim

I dreamed I could follow him

And as he slipped slowly away

I kept following that day

No wonder he used a broom to sweep

My fathers footstep stencilled feet

But every now and then I see a hole

In the snow I see his soul

Sadness follows in my inept

its just something I must accept

But I be eager the day my feet will greet

my fathers footstep stencilled feet...

I hope that helps

TonyWK

Thank you Tony, beautiful words and very helpful YouTube video.

Repost anytime, we are hear to listen.

Take care

TonyWK

KarmaLlama
Community Member

Hey Marian

So sorry for your loss. I too lost a parent to Cancer. Grief is horribly painful and normal, no two ways about it. The grief is not just restricted to the loss itself .. it includes the suffering your loved one endured and your feelings of a lost future without them amongst other things ... and it doesn't go away. The idea of never being able to see someone again is so very hard, and at times, unfathomable. My mother passed 6 years ago and I find it easier, as time goes on, to reflect on the good stuff ... the funny things she said or did or the things I loved most about her.

My mother gave me a rose the day my daughter was born. I have turned that rose in to many others through striking them and I gift them to people going through difficult times. It's a way of preserving her memory by telling the story as well as paying it forward.

Blessings to you, KL

BlueSpring
Community Member
Hi Marian,

I lost my mum last year and really resonate with your feelings. I also get triggered by places, movie scenes, photos, smells, etc. It's so hard. It's harder now than it was when she died.

I hope you're ok ♡