Life is complicated

[Bella_C]

Hi everyone,

i don’t really know how to do this, so I’m just going to type out a few things. Life definitely hadn’t been all that very kind to me in some respects and I don’t always know how to cope - I try to just get over it all like I’m always told too but sometimes that just doesn’t quite feel like enough, and it can be really difficult to wake up every morning, especially when I feel like I’m drowning and my chest is compressed with all of my stress and anxieties. Does anyone know how to help in lessening these feelings? It would be really appreciated if someone could help me out a bit here, as I find it really hard to talk to others about things I’ve gone through and typically prefer the method of smiling and laughing at my expense instead of being truthful.
sometimes I feel like I can’t breathe, and it used to be so bad that panic attacks were something I had gotten used to, as a preteen.

im sorry for offloading all of this on here, but I really hope someone can give me some advice as the usual being exercise and meditation don’t quite work for me.

thank you for reading all of this, if you did. I’m sorry again and thanks for letting me talk about this small part of my issue on here. I appreciate being able to vent.

[Not_Batman]

Hi Bella_C

no apology necessary at all. If you want to offload something, this is a a good place to start.

welcome, and well done for your first post. It can be a big scary step, but you did it. High five!!

“Does anyone know how to help in lessening these feelings?”

yes, there are many things that you can do, and you’ll find that everyone on the forum has a slightly different way to reduce the stresses, and the impact it had on the mind and body.

Its not always possible, because its the expensive option, but talking to you doctor, psychiatrist, psychologist can help immensely to help you understand your thoughts, and then you can help yourself by recognising the issues and working on them. Talking to a psychologist and going through cognitive behaviour therapy CBT or acceptance and commitment therapy ACT are good to teach you strategies to cope with your thoughts, and allow you to take the power back.

depending on what the doc says, if you go onto anti depressants you may get some relief from anxiety, but these take time to build up in you system, not an instant problem solver as in the movies.

Breathing exercises, mindfulness and self care are the main strategies that i use to work on what im feeling. Listening to a guided meditation allows you to focus your thoughts.

panic attacks, ugh aren't they just a pain! Using the techniques above can really help, and get tou back on track and get you thinking differently.

its okay to smile and laugh, but try not to be self deprecating about it, as this can add to the insecurities we have in ourselves, and worsens the problem.

If you need to talk to someone more readily, lifeline is available on 131114, or you can have a live chat on the website. Ive done both of these before.

Anxiety and depression can be a long road, and i hope you find strength and courage to empower yourself to find joy.

I hope that helps.

Not_Batman

[White_Rose]

Dear Bella_C

Hello and welcome. You have definitely come to the right place to talk about the things that trouble you. This is where you can let your hair down, so to speak. Most, if not all, the people who post here have areas of difficulty and need encouragement from others. We are all affected in different ways but with the common ground of knowing how much life can hurt at times. So talk to us as much as you want.

The obvious place to start is with your GP but it can be hard to talk in a face to face situation like that unless you have a very good relationship with the GP. As Not_Batman has said, it can be expensive to see a professional therapist. However I do suggest you chat with your GP first and ask about the cost of professional help. In the meantime you can contact Beyond Blue on 1300 22 3646 and chat with the very understanding people here. This service is available 24/7.

I find the more energy I put into pretending all is well and looking happy with life the less energy we have to work on various difficulties. No need to go around with a glum face, just focus on looking after yourself in these situations. I know it's easy for me to say this as I am not in the same place as you, but as a principle I believe it's something to hold on to.

Would you go to the top of the page to The Facts then click on the Anxiety and Depression Checklist. It's a starting place to explore what you feel. Print it out and take to your GP. It's only 10 questions and is not a diagnostic tool but it will give you an idea of where you are. It's a good piece of information to show your GP. Your doctor will then be able to help you discuss what's wrong and how you feel. Good doctors know it's not easy to jump into a conversation of this sort and will be able to guide you.

In the meantime can you start thinking about the events you find hard to cope with. Being told to get over it is the most un helpful comment people give. To me it's like saying don't worry about your broken leg, it will heal. Not many people hobbling around on a broken, untreated leg that I have noticed. Make a few notes to talk about as we all forget something while talking to a doctor.

Please try to put your energy into some deep breathing when you are distressed. While it sounds like advice from granny it is helpful to drink lots of water.

I hope you will continue to write in.

Mary