Hurting and lost

[Nicole_b]

I've been diagnosed. I take medication which thankfully keeps me well enough to function (mostly).

i installed the app a year ago and just reached for it. My "safe" people to go to are my kids (ridiculous as they are little), secondly someone I've contacted days ago and had zero reply and the third is the person who has sparked this latest decline. How sad I have no one? My fault I guess for bad choices.

i tried the help line and was on hold forever. Longer than it took me to create a profile.

I just want someone, anyone, to tell me it's going to be ok and that I'll manage my way out of this again. I've spent 5 days in bed sobbing and can't snap out of it. It's got to go away

[geoff]

dear Nicole, it's terrible feeling the way you do, and unless you have been through this state of being depressed then you won't understand what the feeling is like.
Medication is only helping you half the way, and I say this because what needs to happen is for the person to take medication plus the need for counselling, because medication alone won't help you overcome and understand why you feel this way.
It doesn't matter how old your children are because the attachment between the two of you is always going to be strong no matter what, in actual fact you fallback onto them even if they're not old enough to talk, and that's what forms a loving connection.
These two other people aren't to be trusted, they aren't your friends, even though it may have seemed they were, and when you do feel terrible any so called 'friends' disappear and don't want any communication with you.
I'm sorry that the wait took longer than you wanted on the help line.
I would like to know if you have a partner/husband as you haven't mentioned any, never the less this is the time when you should go and see your doctor, if you are able to do so, maybe your mum or any sibling can go with you, because you need the help that is always required for anybody who is suffering depression, it won't go away by itself and it has every chance of getting worse, you don't want that to happen, nor do we. Geoff. x

[Starwolf]

Hi Nicole,

I'm sorry you have been left feeling so sad and alone. Please do not blame yourself for choosing the wrong people. Unfortunately, the only way to know for sure whether those around us are acquaintances only or true friends is to observe their reaction to our need for help.

Due to the number of people requiring assistance via the helpline, it is a good idea to have several options. There's also Lifeline (13 11 14) and the Suicide Call Back Service (1300 65 9467).

You mention medication but no ongoing counseling. I suggest you ask your GP for referral to a therapist. You may need to be put on a mental health plan, which entitles you to 10 free consultations. At times, we all need to be able to talk in depth with someone who understands and can help us along this difficult journey. No need to struggle alone. With the right help and support, there is no reason why you wouldn't regain some quality of life and peace of mind. Learning to manage mental/emotional unrest is important.

Please take good care of yourself. Your well-being is your birthright.