Hi everyone

[Aqualung]

Hi there, for maybe the first time in my life I feel that I am depressed and not just a passing depression, but something that I see no end to. My life has just turned upside down at 53 years of age have lost my job due to redundancy. My wife and I live alone, we have no kids. We love each other but have never really communicated effectively as she is from a different culture and does not seem to be on the same wavelength in many ways. There are language barriers and now I realise how much I relied on my colleagues for communication and companionship, as all my friends and family are overseas, it is just my wife and I here we emigrated here 10 years ago. Before I came to Australia my life was not good, so many changes and never settled from a young age. Finally I found stability here, building a lovely home together about 50 km from the CBD with a nearby job that I didn't realise how much I had enjoyed until I lost it. I know it will be impossible to find another job in my field near where we live, and I feel tired, I don't have the energy to start again at my age. I have never felt like this before, I never took depression seriously, it just seemed a passing thing to me. Now I can't snap out of it and night times are the worst, I can't sleep with worry and regret. Anyway, thanks for listening, just writing this post made me feel a little better.

[blondguy]

Hi Aqualung

Welcome to the forums and good on you for having the courage to post!

Im sorry to hear about your redundancy. I am in my 50's and had the same thing happen in Jan 2016 and it hurts

At the moment you would feel like there is no end to the way you feel but its still temporary. Being in this dark place is horrible. You have done well to have come so far and be successful in doing so too.

Night can be unsettling as a tired mind will stray and focus on whats happened and can have a detrimental effect on our sleep. Ive had diagnosed depression for 21 years and its a pain.

I hope you can make a double appointment with your GP and let her/him know what you have been going through as well as losing your established network of people that you have communicated with. Even the visit itself will bolster your attitude as you will have the chance to vent and find some new methods to help you cope/sleep

Snapping out of a depressed mindset doesnt really happen. It like a physical injury and we sometimes need some basic guidance to help us help ourselves find the light that used to be there before.

I dont blame you for feeling tired as these feelings are a huge drain on our mental health. Who knows....you may feel like going back into the workforce when you (will) recover some peace.

nice to meet you Aqua and its good that writing your post made you feel a little better 🙂

There are many gentle people on the forums that can be here for you

you are not alone here

my kind thoughts

Paul

[Starwolf]

Good to meet you Aqualung.

Acknowledging there is a problem takes courage...well done for sharing your thoughts and concerns.

You are right, there is a difference between feeling depressed and depression. One is a passing state of mind, the other a medical condition requiring medical attention and treatment.

I'd suggest you do the K10 test (top left of this page in the Facts section). It will help you get a clearer idea of what may be wrong.

As Paul advised above, booking a long GP appointment would be a wise first step towards managing the situation. You owe it to yourself to reclaim some quality of Life and peace of mind. Just like any other medical condition, depression will not go away if ignored. If things are left to run their course, it will infiltrate every area of your life. The good news is, with help and support, it can and will get better.

Not having support on the home front makes it more difficult. Please feel free to keep posting. We'd love to know more about you. Navigating the forums will show you are far from alone (1 in 5 of us will be affected by a mental illness in the course of our lives). I hope connecting and interacting will help bring some measure of comfort.

Kindest thoughts.

[Aqualung]

Thanks very much for your response Paul, I will follow your advice and go to see my GP in the first instance. I can't believe how much courage you have to cope with depression for 21 years, but I sincerely hope you find peace of mind after suffering for so long.

Aqua

[Aqualung]

Hi Starwolf, thank you very much for your response and your practical suggestions. I wrote this post on impulse last night not knowing what to expect, but I really appreciate both replies and I will surely follow your advice and familiarise myself with this board, and keep posting.

Aqua

[Starwolf]

Thank you for your kind feedback and kudos to you for taking the plunge and being proactive. It is good to have you on board.

Please take care and let us know how you go.

[blondguy]

Hey Aqua

Always nice to get great feedback...Thanks!

As Starwolf said....good on you for being proactive with your health

Great to have you as part of the family here Aqua

I hope your weekend is good to you

Paul