Hi everyone not sure what the next step is now.

[JasmineBlue]

Hi everyone,

I’m very new to something like this but I thought I’ll give it a go.

I have been suffering from depression for about 10 months now and have never experienced it before. I know the type of depression I have was reactive. There has been a lot of changes happen in my life really quickly most have been amazing but a few have set this off. I got married at the start of last year and on the honeymoon I got really unwell with Bali belly this kickstarted the depression.

I have always been a really happy go lucky person that can deal with everything that thrown at me, that’s why I’m so lost about the situation I’m in now. I have been seeing a counsellor for all this time but feel like I reached all I can do with her.

I have had the real negative thoughts mostly stop with the odd ones that come through. Now I just feel so down, unhappy and like I’m never going to get through this. I found my self last night having to get out of the house and just be alone so I went for a drive and just cried.

I just don’t know what the next step is, who to see or what to do? I’m really lost and overwhelmed at the moment. Any suggestions would be great.

Thank you

[quirkywords]

Hi Jasmine,

Welcome to the forum. This is a safe friendly, caring , supportive and non judgmental. Well done for taking this first step in writing down how you are feeling and posting it. That is a big deal and you have done it.

When depression hits it can take one by surprise especially when you have seen yourself has happy go lucky. person that can cope with whatever life deals.

Is your husband supportive? I assume you have told him how you are feeling and he would have noticed.

Did you take a while to feel better after your gastric sickness? I know people who after they feel better they still find for months they feel tired and run down.

Beyond Blue has a booklet you can download about different remedies for depression and how effective each one is.

I find writing helps to work out my feelings and having a journal I can work though emotions. It helps me see how I change and what makes things worse and what helps.

There is Beyondblue support service that you can ring and have a chat 1300 22 4636.

Other people will have other suggestions.

I just wanted to welcome you and say hello.

Quirky

[Feeling_Lonely]

Hi Jasmine,

Welcome!! I second everything that Quirky has said.

Depression can hit anyone at anytime. When you’ve been a person that’s had everything together for so long, it is surprising and hard to accept.

Firstly it is great that you have recognised you are depressed and are seeking help for it. Potentially you may need to see a different councillor for a different perspective.

Do you work or have hobbies that help to fill your days?

i try to do lots of positive self talk, journaling, meditating and mindfulness and keep a gratitude journal as well to keep my mind in a more positive space... some days are harder than others. I also treat my body with respect and force myself to exercise and eat well and drink plenty of water.

Have you spoken with your husband about what you are going through?

Wishing you kindness and giving you a big virtual hug 🙂

[JasmineBlue]

Thank you guys for getting back to me, it means alot

My husband knows everything that’s going on, he has been very supportive. He is also feeling really lost with the situation as well.

I am working and I’m about to start a new job which I hope might changes things a bit. I’m finding I have very little energy and also tired which just makes me feel worse. All I want is to be happy and it’s so hard when you think you will never get back to it.

I think I have recovered from the sickness, but am left with this still. My counsellor said that my gut can have a lot to do with my mental health and I need to rebalance that which I’m trying to do. I must admit I haven’t been the best when you feel like crap and don’t want to do anything. Something happened in my wedding which isn’t big deal and no one would even notice (I’m but embrassed to talk about it) and when I got sick I think I over obsessed about it and because everything was unbalanced it sent me into this.

I’m just starting to move on from that not having those real negative thoughts about it but kind of do. I just really want it to go away.

[Feeling_Lonely]

That’s wonderful that you have a supportive husband Jasmine.

I know of people that have had a really tough time after their weddings too... it’s kind of described as a “wedding come down”. It’s like you’ve spent so much time and energy planning this one magic day and then it comes and goes and leaves you with this emptiness once it’s passed as there’s nothing to look forward to.

Hopefully the new job will help to give you purpose and keep your mind active.

Its hard when we want to just feel happy... try and acknowledge where you’re at instead of fighting it. I know it sounds silly, but sometimes saying to ourselves, “I’m having a hard day today and it’s okay” can help.

You mentioned rebalancing... what are you doing to try and achieve this?

[JasmineBlue]

Thank you Feeling Lonely,

I try my hardest to notice the good times throughout the day and just smile. It makes me feel a better, but I think I’m way too hard on my self.

To rebalance my gut I saw a naturopath and she gave me a few things to take and looked at my diet etc. I know I need to start exercising and getting out more.

I have read a lot about post wedding blues and I feel like some of it relates to me but then the way I feel about what happened, there isn’t anything on it. I just so embrassed disappointed and feel like I failed something and I’m still in shocked that I feel this way. I know I can’t help what happened. I’m just so tired of my mind reminding me everyday. I just want to move on from this now and I don’t know why I can’t.

[Feeling_Lonely]

I feel in a very similar way regarding the breakdown of a relationship. I need to let it go, but I’m stuck... dwelling on him, what I could have said or done differently, dealing with being alone and feeling unable to move forward because my mind won’t let it go as much as I tell myself I need to. It’s frustrating. Like you I then become incredibly hard on myself for still feeling this way.

I guess we are both doing the right things, but it is just going to take more time and for us to be persistent and keep trying to be positive, to let go and focus on ourselves and our needs.