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Hi Again, Finally found forums again after 6 yrs Finally!

CraftyDivaz
Community Member

Hi, Sorry this may be long as I'm desperate again for someone to hear and understand me.

I've finally found the forums again after roughly 6 yrs of struggling with my bipolar and life's struggles!

I'm sorry to everyone if they are still here that replied to me several years ago. I was not in a situation where I was able to log in or continue friendships consistently from the situation I was in at the time. So I now have x3 divorce, I'm now a single mother of a 9 yr old autistic boy, struggling to co-parent with a narcissistic ex. 

My perfectionist mother is my main support other then my psychiatrist, I'm on medications that help me sleep and mainly control and lift my depression. Now I still have issues with hyper-manic and mixed episodes of various types, including energy or low energy low levels of some of possible hyper-mania type symptoms mixed with some depression, I feel this anxious energy like cant sit still and some talking fast but feel low emotionally at the same time like feeling hopeless and useless etc. I also have problems with anxiety, ptsd, anxiety, panic attacks, memory and some concentration issues.

I've been separate from my emotionally abusive 3rd ex for over 3 yrs now and only have just been able to start connecting with old friends again. I still have feelings of "not really fitting in society" and can only stand small amounts of socializing etc., and am easily overwhelmed by people who don't understand mental health issues... There doesn't seem as many online groups and discussion boards as there used to be about mental health etc, or else I can't find them... I crave and am good online but am complete opposite and shy and can't hardly talk and too scared to join in person groups...

 

Would love just even one or two people willing to chat once in a while online to swap stories and general support, but I may not be extremely consistent, just letting everyone know...

2 Replies 2

Sophie_M
Moderator
Moderator
Hello CraftyDivaz!

Welcome Back! It has been quite some time. We are extremely grateful that you have found your way back to our community!

Wow. that's a lot in the intervening years - we are glad you are OK when things could have ended up far worse all considered, and all though the supports are not perfect we are glad you have them!

Can we ask quickly, do you have NDIS supports, or pediatric specialists for your little boy? Has anyone put you in contact with local specialist groups?

There are some amazing resources online for Narcissstic Abuse Recovery, have you looked into any of these?

As frustrating as it can be sometimes to need connection but not feel up to socializing much, it is also really amazing to see you acknowledge and honor your boundaries. It sounds to us like, in spite all the twists, turns and challenges, you have worked hard and have come through. There are many battles to go, and we would love to be here for you as you tackle them, but please allow us to acknowledge with you all you have overcome so far as well!

Remember that you can reach out to us directly, 24/7 on 1300 22 4636. or you can start a webchat with us by clicking here.

We are very grateful to have you back, CraftyDivaz, and we hope to see you in more conversations soon!

Regards,

Sophie M.

 

Croix
Community Champion
Community Champion

Dear CraftyDivaz~

 

Welcome back to the Forum, it’s been a while and things have certainly changed for you. Now a single mum of a 9yr old who is autistic and trying to co-parent with an ex who is narcissistic.

 

On top of that bipolar and all the hassles that creates. Live certainly has not been to kind to you.

 

As you would know separation does not mean the relationship stops when children are concerned, and it can be a real struggle to agree upon the best course of action with schools, doctors and even where to live.

 

It does take a very long time to get over a toxic relationship, and I think you are probably doing well if you have started to re-connect with old friends. In time I’d hope that becomes a source of comfort and enjoyment for you. Not feeling just at the moment you don’t really fit in is natural, and again I’d hope that sensation will get less over time as you interact with others more.

 

It’s true many simply do not understand the issues with mental health and that of course can cause one to feel at a distance, however it is their lack of experience, not you. I guess that is one reason places such as this forum exist - here people to understand.

 

While I think of it there is a long-running topic you may like to look at and even post on:

 

https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/long-term-support-over-the/this-bipolar-life/td-p/216490/page/98...

 

It basically has a fair number of people with bipolar come together and chat or relate experiences. Everyone is friendly, even if the don’t answer straight away.

 

I’m glad you mum is there for you, even though I can imagine her perfectionist ideals might be a trial at times, and also glad you have a psychiatrist to assist. I found I never started to improve until I had both a competent GP and psych.

 

Having though about all you have set out in yur post I think you must be doing an amazing job and your son is lucky to have you.

 

I do hope you talk here some more

 

Croix