Help with anxiety and worry

[Meg1977]

hi im new to this so thanx in advance ive always suffered with anxiety and constantly worrying all the time so ive been to the docs and have started medication the support/help from you guys is how do i help my teenager with his anxiety when im trying to deal with my own? Anything and everything with him worries me to beyond belief some thjngs as little as bejng late with handing things up to school or not going out with friends when things have been planned as a group of them i dont want him to turn out like me...

[Emmen]

Hi Meg1977,

Welcome to the forums.

It's difficult enough struggling with anxiety yourself, and now you've also got to support a teenager with the same problem. It's a tough situation and I'm glad you've reached out.

I'd think the first thing for you to do would be to manage your own anxiety before helping anyone else. Like you say, it's not sustainable for both of you to be worrying about the same thing because when you do, you just get even more anxious. It's good you have gotten medication, but I wonder if you'd like to combine that with other habits that can reduce your anxiety? For instance, practicing mindfulness or creating a habit to take a step back when you face an anxiety inducing situation to assess whether it really is that bad. It's only when you manage your own anxiety that you can calm him down. Plus these skills are something you can teach him too, if they work for you.

Warmly,
M

[SarahZ]

Hello Meg1977,

Welcome to the forums and thanks for reaching out - it is very brave and courageous of you!

I'm really sorry to hear that you have been dealing with anxiety for a long time. I can't imagine how difficult it is coping with your own anxiety and also your child's anxiety simultaneously. I can really tell from your post how deeply you care about your child. @Emmen mentioned a good point that managing your own anxiety as important before helping someone else. However, I can tell how much you want to help your child which is completely understandable! Do you and your child have a good relationship such that you can both openly communicate to each other about your individual mental health?

It may be beneficial introducing him to these forums and showing him potential support links that he might find beneficial. Below I have linked a some super helpful links providing tips on how to deal with anxiety, which he may hopefully be interested in looking at.

https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/anxiety/self-help-tips-for-managing-anxiety

https://www.beyondblue.org.au/the-facts/anxiety/treatments-for-anxiety/anxiety-management-strategies

https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/anxiety/worry-worry-worry

Please keep as updated if you feel up to it.

Wishing you all the best and sending you positive thoughts!

[Zachary59]

Hello Meg1977,

It is a good thing that you have gone to your doctor for some professional help. That has to be a big step in the right direction.

Have you thought of asking your teenage son if he would like also to visit a doctor (perhaps your own doctor) as it may help both you and your son work together to manage anxiety and worry.