Hello hello. Just wanted to introduce myself and say hello.

[Betty_Meow]

Hello.

My name is Betty.. I have been meaning to sign up to beyondblue's forum.. So here I am.. I have been turning to the online world for some support and just to have people to talk to..

My story... I was diagnosed with depression nearly 11yrs ago, at age 20.. I have managed ok.. I got to a place where I was able to manage my depression on my own.. It was really good.. But unfortunately 3 years ago I started to struggle with life and depression again.. And it feels very different this time.. A bit like the depression is deeper.. Hard to explain..

This past May I was also diagnosed with severe anxiety.. That is very hard for me to manage.. At this point in time I struggle alot..

It's a comfort to know I am not alone and that other people understand what I am going through.

It's great that there are these online forums for people to reach out for support and to connect with others.

Betty.

[geoff]

hello Betty, welcome to the site and thanks for posting your comment.
We often say that our depression is hard to explain, well that maybe so because everyone has their own type of depression, but the main point that is common throughout this site is that this illness has mentally crippled you, no different than anybody else, and we know how much it has destroyed our life.
Depression and anxiety go hand in hand as far as I'm concerned, because it's difficult to believe that with one you can't have the other, other people may disagree and that's OK by me, but we are unable to totally rid ourselves from having depression, it's always there, whether you are able to control it or whether it continually reappears, we carry it where ever we go, but once you are put in a situation that you feel uncomfortable with then it raises it's ugly head again, and that's what you are now struggling with.
Something has caused this maybe 3 years ago, but has it been building up before this, where you could think that you would be able to control it, but it was over taking you faster than you wanted.
It's always sad when I hear that this does happen but I have to be realistic because I know it happens with me.
Hope to hear back from you. Geoff. x

[Betty_Meow]

Hello Geoff.

Thank you for welcoming me and your reply..

I suppose I say it's hard to explain because I just don't have the words to describe how I am feeling.. Sometimes I just sit in silence in the middle of the night and don't even know how I feel.. You know?! Yes, that's right.. Everyone has their own type of depression but I know that everyone here on this site knows that same feeling.. I feel that depression and anxiety go hand in hand, too.. And I also agree with you that depression is always there.. YES.. You got it in one.. Explained it very well.. You've given me something to think about it.. I have been feeling guilty and sad for struggling again.. That is why it took me so long to go to my doctor and seek help.. I was doing so good.. And then yep, depression raises it's ugly head again.. From one day to the next.. It was waiting in the shadows.. I think you are right, it was building up long before this.. I have changed alot over the last 3yrs but more so the past year.. Just want to see the light at the end of the tunnel.. Get through this storm.. Thanks muchly, Geoff.. xxx

[Kazzl]

Hello hello Betty! Welcome. I was drawn to your post by your lovely title. Hello!

Like so many people here, I've very familiar with the black dog and its nasty bites. Severe anxiety is a double whammy, but also quite common unfortunately. Have you got a good doctor and or psych? And do you have supportive family or friends around you? These things can make such a difference when it hits hards.

It's good you have the experience of successfully managing it on your own, that should really help you stay well between bouts (which hopefully will be few and far apart). It's really important to take good care of yourself too - even though when we're depressed we don't want to. Eating well, maintaining a regular sleep pattern if possible, staying hydrated and getting some fresh air and exercise really does help.

How are you feeling today? I hope you'll keep talking with us.

Kaz