Welcome and Orientation

Pinned discussions

Meet your community champions!

replies: 10

Hi everyone, We wanted to share with you the way that our wonderful Community Champions are here to support you. You may have noticed that a few of our Forums members are labelled ‘Community Champion’. Community Champions are volunteers within the Beyond Blue Forums who: have the time, skills and empathy to support other members regularly; help to welcome new members; are actively engaged members that help set the tone of our community. Our Community Champions are regular contributors to many conversations across the forums. They are a consistent and friendly voice that have committed to sharing their experience and expertise with this community. They are not health care professionals or clinicians. Like you, they have an experience with a mental health challenge or diagnosis – either for themselves or someone they care for. This forum is for people who understand what it feels like and have a lived and living experience of mental health challenges. Our Community Champions help everyone feel comfortable and confident by demonstrating what excellent peer support is all about. Click here to find out more about how you can become a Community Champion! This incredible team are excited to introduce themselves below, and we are sure you’ll see them around the forums in conversations important to you.

HELP..Am I posting in the right section?

replies: 10

Welcome to those who are considering posting for the very first time, welcome. Thought I would repost part of the words that Chris B posted awhile ago, (2014) as I can hear that people are unsure if they are posting in the right section or worried that they are posting "the wrong thing". 1.A good title makes the difference Just like a headline in a newspaper, when scanning the dozens of threads to click into, it’s only natural that people will choose the ones that resonate with them most. A title that entices the reader, or asks a question, is likely to get a better result than something non-descriptive like “Depression” or “I don't know what to do”. If you think you’re not good at choosing titles, leave it till last. Spend time writing your post, then perhaps choose a sentence from what you’ve written as the title. 2.Join in threads that have already been posted We all have our own unique stories, but part of the reason for joining a forum like this one is because you know that you will have a lot in common with others who are posting. Before starting a new thread, have a look through the current topics being discussed and see if there’s a conversation you can join in with. It can be quite common to have a handful of very similar threads happening at any one time, with members seemingly unaware that there are others right there who are going through the same thing. Talking to other members on their threads is a great way of getting yourself known so that when you post a thread of your own, people may respond quicker because they recognize your name. 3.Choose the most appropriate section for your post Many people browse the forums looking for stories specifically to do with pregnancy and parenting, employment, grief, loss, separation etc. Going straight for the “Depression” section may seem like the easiest option, but this section is often the busiest, so your post is more likely to get lost among the threads. Making good use of the different forum sections not only helps keep the forum relevant, but you’re more likely to find others who are going through the same experiences as you. Also, if you're wanting to discuss issues of trauma, abuse, suicidal thoughts or self-harm, it's really important you post in the designated section to avoid triggering others who may not wish to read about these topics. Mostly..just come and chat, we are here for you. Our amazing wizards in the background will see your message ends up in the right spot. Sarah

All discussions

Sorted by:

Start a discussion

Needing help

replies: 4

Hi everyone, I am looking for some help or guidance. I have always had anxiety since I was younger and it has never left me. It gets bad when someone says something or my feelings get overwhelmed and spiral down the rabbit hole which I don't like at all. I hate how anxiety always seems to control everything that i do or say. I get panicked if i say something wrong to my partner or when i express something thats on my mind or feel uncomfortable. My biggest one is being cheated on which i know he wont do but i cant shake the fear. I am happy with my life right now but when those spiders called anxiety keep creeping in i feel trapped and 'know what to do or how to control it. I need help please anyone help me. From KingdomHeartsGurl

Had enough

replies: 3

Hi everyone. This is my first time and I need help. I was diagnosed with depression 10 years ago which affected my health to the point of death within a year. Luckily, I found the right medication and things improved slowly. Now I can feel myself falling again. I was brought up in a household where you do not talk to people about your problems even your partner, “familiarity breeds contempt”. Anyway, maybe someone out there can help. I have been unemployed for five years. Previously I was a branch manager for a national company. Now I have no money, no family, no one to turn to and in employer’s eyes too old. What is the point? Everyone is going to die eventually so why struggle? Due to my upbringing (again) being on government benefits means you are bludger and useless. Any suggestions so I can see light again? Also I live in the country which I hate but have no choice. I dread waking up in the mornings.

Marriage issues

replies: 1

I am at a loss. I am a 40 yo man married 12 years. My wife is 38. We have a 7yo boy with high functioning autism and a 4yo girl. My job is stressful and thankless with little opportunity to progress, but it pays well and I've been there long enough (10 yrs) that I work good hours which allow me to get home earlier and spend more time with my family. I feel trapped there because if i moved I'd have to adapt to longer hours, and I am the primary earner bringing in 75% of the household income. Despite our son's condition, the kids are not a massive stress. My wife works remotely from home. She is the only employee in a small business. There are always issues with her job, her boss, the technology, the clients. It consumes so much off our time. The trouble is our marriage and more specifically the lack of affection and intimacy. It has got worse and worse over the last 7 years (since our son was born). We were like any newly married couple before that. Then the excuses started. At first my wife seemed genuinely regretful and we'd take 'rainchecks'. Now i either get no answer or a flat no, and every night she'll roll over as far away from me as possible. I sometimes get given excuses. Tiredness most often, until sheer can rely on 'bad timing'. Often it's also the strategic comments or body language designed to discourage any attempt. It's not just in bed. We never even say 'hello', 'goodbye' or anything like that any more. I initiate everything. Every 'i love you '. Every time i beg or grovel for some sort of intimacy. I'm close to giving up on all of it. How pathetic, i can hear everyone saying. We've tried counseling. It did not work. I have tried to talk about it, but she does not engage. So many times i have tried. We now fight all the time. About her work. About the lack of any affection or intimacy. My wife is miserable and angry every day. I am the punching bag. I lose my temper snd get very frustrated and depressed. But i have never raised a hand to her. I lay awake most nights. Our kids are my world and i can't put them through a separation. But i cannot accept that we're going to be stuck in this rut for the next 30-40 years. I go to the gym 5 days each week (at 5.30 am to cause minimal impact on her) to try to improve myself and see if that changes things. So far no luck (but i am much fitter). My wife stopped going to the gym after 3 visits. She has no passion for anything. I just cannot see any way through.

Hi there,I'm new to the forums

replies: 7

Greetings everyone! My name is MrDonut. This is my first post in the forums. I'm an American, but I've been living in Australia since Dec. 2015, and having married my Australian wife in Nov. 2016. My hobbies include writing, drawing, as well as gaming. I had a few specific questions to ask people in similar situations as mine, which I might ask under another topic. How is everyone doing?

New here, figuring out if these forums can help me

replies: 9

Hi everyone, I'm new here, and figuring out if these forums can help me. I've been living with multiple mental illnesses, chronic pain, and other medical problems for 10 years now. Over the last two years I've spent seven months in a psychiatric hospital across six admissions. If you passed me on the street you might not know though; I'm only 36 years old and fit and have some semblance of a 'normal' life at times. I'm good at creating that illusion anyway, often to my detriment. Currently I'm in hospital and I'll be going home soon. My treating team and I think I would benefit from more support, even though I already have extensive professional support when I'm home. I'm curious to see how I can get support from these forums. Thanks everyone.

I need of support!

replies: 2

Hey Guys, I'm in year 11 at the moment and I'm struggling with both depression and anxiety, both in the high range and have had for about less then a year (maybe more). Lately, I've been struggling to get out of bed to go to school, like really struggling. I always wake up quite early and also go to bed quite early too but find myself being extremely tired, which I know is normal for depression. When I wake up for school I always dread the thought of seeing people and just being in an environment such as school. I hate sitting in a classroom all day and not even seeing my friends motivates me to go to school. Some days I drag myself to go to school but find myself leaving early because I just can't cope. I find that I can cope with the workload well and I get good marks, but its just the thought of school that makes me feel depressed. When I stay home from school, I find myself being content with the thought of being away from school but then always worry about if I am going to miss anything. Obviously, I want to pass year 11 and I want to do well but I feel as though my depression and anxiety has taken over my life somewhat and is stopping me from doing what I love because i used to really like going to school! I find that I'm motivated to do just about anything else, whether it be exercise or seeing friends but its JUST SCHOOL that I don't like anymore. I'm not sure if it's because of the learning or because of seeing people, or maybe a mix but I hate that one part of me wants to do well in school but another part doesn't even want to go! At the moment im seeing a GP, psycologist and im taking antidepressants all of which have slightly improved me (from what i can tell) I really hope someone understands and could possibly help Thankyou

Iam new her and just need help

replies: 2

As I said I'm new here and just need help cant stop crying spend most of my time trying to be asleep or trying but not getting anywhere its been seven months and dont know where to turn and cant go and ask for help not suicidal just done

reaching out...

replies: 3

hello to everyone here, So, I guess this was my biggest and first ever step in reaching out...which, I feel like I should have done a long time ago. I will try to keep this as simple as possible without going into my "issues" ...being an introduction post and all. about me: -26yo - have my own car - have my own money - single/no kids - live at home (because have you seen Sydney prices? ..they make my eyes water) From the topics I have already read around the forums, I felt like I was in the right place to gain help. From everything I have written so far I'm sure my life seems easy compared to most..however, I will be taking the time to post my own issues on the appropriate threads to give people a deeper look and hopefully to try and help or even check in with me. In my spare time I enjoy drawing/sketching, reading novels... and I like solitude ..or at least I think I do.. lack of friends. so, Hello for now..and it just feels like a step in the right direction to be here.

Hi everybody

replies: 15

Hello I'm not so sure if I'm comfortable posting many details here but here goes. I've been a supporter for my partner for a while. We have a history, we've known each other since he came to Australia 15 years ago (yeah long time lol). We did date 9 years ago, we broke up and we got back together last year and he revealed that he broke up with me because he had depression and anxiety that was undiagnosed. What I am looking for is some kind of help really. Everything is going well but I want to help him out without feeling like I'm controlling or forcing him to do something he doesn't want. I remember when I had a meltdown a few weeks ago because I was frustrated and he revealed that he had a bad case of depression that he shut everyone out and was in a bad place. I want to help him and so far just being there is okay but I am scared he will get in that dark place again. He has been brave and strong for me when, three weeks ago, my friend died and he took me to the funeral which is a big step and has taken care of me. I want to pay him back though, I want him to just know I'm there and there is nothing to worry about. I'm not good with introductions so umm, yeah. I guess if you want to chat well, I'm here?

Newbie..in need of support

replies: 2

I don't really know how to start i had a severe depression from about age 12-16 and have had some pretty bad lows. I think most people would consider me "recovered" now and I think for the most part I am but I still don't feel right. During my depression I isolated myself and cut off contact with all my friends. I had dropped out of school by the end of year 8 and didn't get back to any sort of education until year 10 going to a Flexi program where I'd made a couple of friends but left because I was in an outpatient program for 6 months then when I returned to school they said I ditched them and they didn't talk to me so I had no friends again. I'm now nearly 18 and done with school but I still can't make friends. I dont even know how to anymore. I feel like a loser and lonely but then at the same time I convince myself that people suck and I'm the lucky one and then I feel like a lonely loser again etc, etc. I'm afraid if people knew me like really knew me they wouldn't like me. I'm afraid to open up. I'm afraid of trusting and I'm afraid that I'm just gonna ghost them in the end like I always do. I have a partner and we've been together since I was 16 and see each other whenever we can but he's the same as me he doesn't have any friends at the moment but for different reasons. I think i take comfort in him a lot. Like he's both my partner my friends and my caregiver so when I start feeling like I'm pathetic it's not so bad cause we're like that together. I've not had any other meaningful friendship/relationship with anybody other than him since I was a kid. i guess the point is that my depression at one point was very obvious and it was very strong and It was debilitating my life but now I'm studying and doing things and everyone including my partner thinks I'm really happy but I'm not. I feel numb and empty inside most days and my main issue is this inner crisis I'm having about friends. Are they just overrated anyway? Am I just making a mountain out of a pebble? Anyway id appreciate some support and I will show support to you guys as I go through the forums

Meet your community champions! replies: 10

HELP..Am I posting in the right section? replies: 10

Needing help replies: 4

Had enough replies: 3

Marriage issues replies: 1

Hi there,I'm new to the forums replies: 7

New here, figuring out if these forums can help me replies: 9

I need of support! replies: 2

Iam new her and just need help replies: 2

reaching out... replies: 3

Hi everybody replies: 15

Newbie..in need of support replies: 2