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Meet your community champions!

replies: 12

Hi everyone, We wanted to share with you the way that our wonderful Community Champions are here to support you. You may have noticed that a few of our Forums members are labelled ‘Community Champion’. Community Champions are volunteers within the Beyond Blue Forums who: have the time, skills and empathy to support other members regularly; help to welcome new members; are actively engaged members that help set the tone of our community. Our Community Champions are regular contributors to many conversations across the forums. They are a consistent and friendly voice that have committed to sharing their experience and expertise with this community. They are not health care professionals or clinicians. Like you, they have an experience with a mental health challenge or diagnosis – either for themselves or someone they care for. This forum is for people who understand what it feels like and have a lived and living experience of mental health challenges. Our Community Champions help everyone feel comfortable and confident by demonstrating what excellent peer support is all about. Click here to find out more about how you can become a Community Champion! This incredible team are excited to introduce themselves below, and we are sure you’ll see them around the forums in conversations important to you.

HELP..Am I posting in the right section?

replies: 10

Welcome to those who are considering posting for the very first time, welcome. Thought I would repost part of the words that Chris B posted awhile ago, (2014) as I can hear that people are unsure if they are posting in the right section or worried that they are posting "the wrong thing". 1.A good title makes the difference Just like a headline in a newspaper, when scanning the dozens of threads to click into, it’s only natural that people will choose the ones that resonate with them most. A title that entices the reader, or asks a question, is likely to get a better result than something non-descriptive like “Depression” or “I don't know what to do”. If you think you’re not good at choosing titles, leave it till last. Spend time writing your post, then perhaps choose a sentence from what you’ve written as the title. 2.Join in threads that have already been posted We all have our own unique stories, but part of the reason for joining a forum like this one is because you know that you will have a lot in common with others who are posting. Before starting a new thread, have a look through the current topics being discussed and see if there’s a conversation you can join in with. It can be quite common to have a handful of very similar threads happening at any one time, with members seemingly unaware that there are others right there who are going through the same thing. Talking to other members on their threads is a great way of getting yourself known so that when you post a thread of your own, people may respond quicker because they recognize your name. 3.Choose the most appropriate section for your post Many people browse the forums looking for stories specifically to do with pregnancy and parenting, employment, grief, loss, separation etc. Going straight for the “Depression” section may seem like the easiest option, but this section is often the busiest, so your post is more likely to get lost among the threads. Making good use of the different forum sections not only helps keep the forum relevant, but you’re more likely to find others who are going through the same experiences as you. Also, if you're wanting to discuss issues of trauma, abuse, suicidal thoughts or self-harm, it's really important you post in the designated section to avoid triggering others who may not wish to read about these topics. Mostly..just come and chat, we are here for you. Our amazing wizards in the background will see your message ends up in the right spot. Sarah

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Severe anxiety attack

replies: 1

Today while working I had a severe anxiety attack at a shopping centre . I had to get back to work car to lay down my heart rate was in regular my palms were so clammy my legs and arms were tingling all over I was so scared I felt like I was dying called work they took me to dr who called ambulance as I couldn't walk my heart rate was through the roof at this stage . After all test were done drs said anxiety can have all the symptoms of a heart attack. Just wished I knew what triggered this and how to stop it if it happened again

Depressed husband confusing me

replies: 3

Hey guys, really in need of some advice please. My husband has depression and it’s quite bad, I mean any form of communication with how he feels is you could say no existent. All I ever get is I don’t know, I’m sorry I can’t answer anything. We’ve been married for 3 months so this is where I’m at a hard place, let me start off by saying this guy is the sweetest most loving guy, he would always put me first and was the one that caught for our relationship meaning he would be the one to fix things or try to make things better when we argued. Now moving onto now he’s so distant he tells me he doesn’t feel anything not even for the kids.. for nothing. Plus he’s been doing a lot of things out of character for him, and towards me in one breath he will tell me it’s not me it’s not my fault and that he loves me but in the next it’s that I’ve pushed him away because of the arguments and that he doesn’t know how he feels about me or anything I ask him things all the time about us he can’t ansfwer them and really every response is almost different than the last it’s becoming so hard for myself to manage my everyday life because I feel so heartbroken and lost and I really don’t know what to do, he is my world we have always had a good relationship and now this is coming between us I try to support him and be “normal” towards him but I don’t know what that is anymore really he’s said a lot of hurtful things and it’s weird because it’s like he doesn’t feel anything can’t answer anything but as soon as he says something so hurtful like the last time he said he didn’t love me like he used to anymore he doesn’t feel a connection or he leaves for the night or days and doesn’t come home it’s like when I react with anger and hurt something inside him is triggered and he tells me it’s not me he loves me he’s sorry doesn’t want to hurt me that it’s just his head.. can someone please give me some advice he tells me he loves me all the time but than tells me he doesn’t feel love for anything and when he does it’s not the same as before. I’m lost here

Looking for support while caring for my disabled son

replies: 3

I don’t know which way to turn. I am so deep in slump and so sad I have no one no family. It’s just me and my severely disabled son. I just had to move and I live where I can’t afford I am hungry and lost and fed up and I just want to hide and sleep and not think or worry. I think I’m having a breakdown. I just want to live 1 day longer than my boy. He’s 25 and needs me but we have no life no joy no nothing. Can’t do lifeline because I can’t hear I’m deaf.

Newbie hello: I'm sad, lonely and don't know how this will get better

replies: 3

Hiiii.... I'm new here.... I've been struggling with depression for about a long time, I've had counselling on and off, dealing with family issues, first marriage break up (I was married to a liar and cheat) and now infertility. Over the years I've moved a lot and over time, I've lost a lot of friends due to moving, I basically no longer have a social circle, just my husband and a couple of friends. I have a small family and we aren't close. I rely on my husband and best friend a lot. The other thing that seems to be getting worse is my energy levels and fatigue. I don't socialise because being with other people in social situations takes a lot of effort, I'm exhausted from it the next day and feel like I can only socialise every couple of weeks because of this. I wish I could reach out to other people and tell them how I'm feeling, but because I have few friends that I trust, I can't. I broke off ties with a lot of friends because they were toxic, vacuous people who frustrated me. The older you get, the harder it is to make real authentic friendships. I will seek counselling again but I honestly don't see how this will get better for me. I'm worried that when I become a mother, I won't be able to cope. Most of all, I don't want to put this all on my husband and wear him out. I work from home and often I just walk around the house crying.

Hello, I am Mira.

replies: 5

Hi, I'm Mira. This is my first time joining and contributing to BeyondBlue. I am 21. I have been sexually assaulted by two people in my lifetime, and violated by one. My first assault was when I was 16, then 20 and 21 respectively. Before this, I faced a lot of domestic abuse at home. Which physically only stopped a few years ago. These are the probably the biggest reasons that resulted in my deterioration. But along the way, there are so many other extreme life events I have surpassed. I am truly grieving, not too much of what happened, but I feel I am prevented from healing. I am not in a position to access therapy. And I have been kept dependent so I can not leave. I don't have a job, or know how to drive, or how to survive if I immediately left. All my abusers are independent from each other. And no one in my personal life knows of these abuses. I temporarily attended free counselling, in secret, and over my holiday she unexpectedly left her job. Deep down inside, I felt, I finally opened up to somebody and it drove her off. At this point in my life, I am just a carcass moving around. I have lost all sense of self. All joy. All motivation. All concentration. The intellectual fire in me. Who could I have been if I had a good personal support system and could access services to help me? If you're out there reading this. What took you down? What makes you keep going? How do you make peace with your reality, especially if you are stuck in a place? With love, Mira

New Member looking for support with complex PTSD.

replies: 2

Hi There, I was diagnosed with PTSD about six years ago after prolonged traumatic events at work. Counselling revealed the importance of delving into childhood traumas that I had learned to live with as well burried unspoken aspects of my past. It has become clear, that coming to terms with PTS and overcoming it to make the future as positive and rich as possible involves finding a specialist who deals with complex PTSD. Many claim to, but really, complex means complex, thinking outside classic cases. I found a great support group on Facebook which has put reasearch and great resources into my hands. What I need to find is now is a specialist who really does focus on complex PTSD, because I’m kinda tired of putting time and effort into building therapeutic relationships only to find that my case is actually more complex than they thought and not really what they comfortably take on. My life is moving in a really positive direction, I’d like to deal with this.

Hey, not feeling the best

replies: 3

Jeez it feels stupid starting with hey but had to start with something. It's currently midnight and I've just searched the internet for some self pity when i came across this website. May as well give it a shot so here it goes. Not going to say my name or age or anything like that. I am still in school and i have constantly been, well depressed and i don't like to throw that word around for nothing. Both my parents have and are dealing with depression and so is my little brother. I live with my father apart from my mum and siblings and go to a school i don't belong. I have never been able to do anything right and have always been the dumbest one of the friendship group. In fact i just had a meltdown to myself because there's an assignment due tomorrow i haven't nor will do. When my brother was diagnosed with depression both my parents forgot about me and he's the center of attention. Don't get me wrong i'm so happy he's getting better but i've always been the let down kid and for once would like them to be proud of me. They both know i don't belong in a fancy school that i currently go to and so do i. I've even been asked by them "Do you even think you belong there?" (Sorry if i keep going off on tangents i'm just still emotional). At school the basic situation is i am pretty ugly, generally piss people off, pretty sure my "friends" hate me, worry for one of my likewise depressed friend and as basic as this sounds, feel so bloody alone. I hate everything about me and wish i had the guts to do something about it. Sorry to end off on a sad note but yeah that's me i guess. Nobody else but whoever reads this knows who i really am. Don't know what this is supposed to achieve but hey i gave it a shot.

Tam

replies: 1

I’m new to this forum. I have bipolar, anxiety and depression I also suffer pts due to abuse. This is just scratching the surface. I work full time and I have a teenager. I don’t have any friends and do not have any strong ties with my family. I’m alone and usually cry myself to sleep. I have a great doctor, but we have tried a mountain of meds and nothing works. My psychiatrist would like to schedule me, but I have a daughter to take care of and bills to pay. Usually I just battle along, but I’ve hit a wall and rock bottom again. Can anyone suggest meds that actually work. I’m desperate and I’m too the point where I struggle to breath.

Feeling lost

replies: 1

I'm almost 30, and have watched so many of my friends get married and now start having children. I am not an outgoing person and dont know a lot of men, so do not have any prospects. I am somewhat overweight and losing weight does not come naturally or quickly to me despite trying. I have only ever had proper interest from 3 men. 2 who took advantage of me when I was bigger, and 1 that was only interested in me when I was slimmer. I have tried online dating and have been repeatedly "ghosted" (aka. a couple of dates then they vanish without a word). I work full time at a job I really try my best to succeed but get steamrolled by colleagues who are trying to get to the top and dont respect me or listen to what I have to say. I have some really lovely friends and feel fortunate to have them, however my nice friends are mostly married and their spare time is often occupied. I have a few single "friends" who seem to latch on to me and who I dont really enjoy spending time with or even like, but dont know how to get rid of them. I thankfully enjoy my own company and find that spending time by myself is often a lot safer and less anxiety inducing, but I know I cant sustain spending too much time on my own mentally and would love to meet a man or a decent friend. I often feel defeated by the world and let down by people who push their own agendas on to me and give me no opportunity to tell them no. I wish I had more confidence and power and I have been told by so many people to "just be more confident" but offer no real help or insight on how to do this. Does anyone else feel powerless in their world? I worked so hard to create a career for myself and feel good, but now that Im here I feel weak and small.

Trying to stay positive

replies: 5

Hi all new to this find it weird telling strangers my problems any way here goes - hurt my back at work 12 months ago spent nearly 12 months off work. Only wife working trying to figure out what I can physically do not enjoying this stage of my life at all feeling of worthless all the time everyday a struggle to get through. Basically had enough of everything I can't enjoy or don't enjoy anything anymore except football I don't engage with my family anymore I'm always in bed try to reason with myself there's plenty of positives but in reality there's not when you can't work all the mental aspects of it to just gets you so down on yourself.

Meet your community champions! replies: 12

HELP..Am I posting in the right section? replies: 10

Severe anxiety attack replies: 1

Depressed husband confusing me replies: 3

Looking for support while caring for my disabled son replies: 3

Newbie hello: I'm sad, lonely and don't know how this will get better replies: 3

Hello, I am Mira. replies: 5

New Member looking for support with complex PTSD. replies: 2

Hey, not feeling the best replies: 3

Tam replies: 1

Feeling lost replies: 1

Trying to stay positive replies: 5