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Meet your community champions!

replies: 10

Hi everyone, We wanted to share with you the way that our wonderful Community Champions are here to support you. You may have noticed that a few of our Forums members are labelled ‘Community Champion’. Community Champions are volunteers within the Beyond Blue Forums who: have the time, skills and empathy to support other members regularly; help to welcome new members; are actively engaged members that help set the tone of our community. Our Community Champions are regular contributors to many conversations across the forums. They are a consistent and friendly voice that have committed to sharing their experience and expertise with this community. They are not health care professionals or clinicians. Like you, they have an experience with a mental health challenge or diagnosis – either for themselves or someone they care for. This forum is for people who understand what it feels like and have a lived and living experience of mental health challenges. Our Community Champions help everyone feel comfortable and confident by demonstrating what excellent peer support is all about. Click here to find out more about how you can become a Community Champion! This incredible team are excited to introduce themselves below, and we are sure you’ll see them around the forums in conversations important to you.

HELP..Am I posting in the right section?

replies: 10

Welcome to those who are considering posting for the very first time, welcome. Thought I would repost part of the words that Chris B posted awhile ago, (2014) as I can hear that people are unsure if they are posting in the right section or worried that they are posting "the wrong thing". 1.A good title makes the difference Just like a headline in a newspaper, when scanning the dozens of threads to click into, it’s only natural that people will choose the ones that resonate with them most. A title that entices the reader, or asks a question, is likely to get a better result than something non-descriptive like “Depression” or “I don't know what to do”. If you think you’re not good at choosing titles, leave it till last. Spend time writing your post, then perhaps choose a sentence from what you’ve written as the title. 2.Join in threads that have already been posted We all have our own unique stories, but part of the reason for joining a forum like this one is because you know that you will have a lot in common with others who are posting. Before starting a new thread, have a look through the current topics being discussed and see if there’s a conversation you can join in with. It can be quite common to have a handful of very similar threads happening at any one time, with members seemingly unaware that there are others right there who are going through the same thing. Talking to other members on their threads is a great way of getting yourself known so that when you post a thread of your own, people may respond quicker because they recognize your name. 3.Choose the most appropriate section for your post Many people browse the forums looking for stories specifically to do with pregnancy and parenting, employment, grief, loss, separation etc. Going straight for the “Depression” section may seem like the easiest option, but this section is often the busiest, so your post is more likely to get lost among the threads. Making good use of the different forum sections not only helps keep the forum relevant, but you’re more likely to find others who are going through the same experiences as you. Also, if you're wanting to discuss issues of trauma, abuse, suicidal thoughts or self-harm, it's really important you post in the designated section to avoid triggering others who may not wish to read about these topics. Mostly..just come and chat, we are here for you. Our amazing wizards in the background will see your message ends up in the right spot. Sarah

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Burnt out

replies: 2

So tired,constant headaches,my life is traumatic, I'm socially isolated. No friends, some home help thru NDIS for myself, I'm autistic with high anxiety & mobility issues & chronic pain issues. I'm sole carer of son who has autism & some delay due to oxygen deprivation @ birth. He is chronologically 28 but mentally 10-14. My emotional age is 17. I find taking care of him quite difficult in the day to day. Prompting for eating, toileting, showering, putting him to bed. I clean up after him, do his washing for him, remind him of things he needs to do & most often times he forgets. He goes out supported @ least 3 days a week, but I can't stand his endless prattle when he arrives home, on useless topics on animations he watches or real or imagined slights that may or may not have happened to him in primary school. He never has a " normal" conversation with me. He has no neurotypical friends. He circulates in disability inclusive supported events, & never meets new people just the " regular suspects". We are in regional/ rural QLD. I only give the state as gov help etc different each state. I will be twice his age next year. I have financial constraints as been on disability pension last 20 yrs, & duped out of any savings I've strived to achieve over the yrs. Father not in picture at all for almost that same amount of time. I'm exhausted & feel useless. I'm supported only in cleaning & shopping, & being taken to family funerals. At least I get to funerals, but it seems a non priority to help me visit the living. I find it devastating when my relatives die. I never see any family & I feel very disconnected mostly on a regular basis & then like I'm meeting with strangers if I move heaven & earth to get something to happen to see them, then I'm worn out, feel more anxious about my interactions with them, & feel overwrought & that it wasn't worth it to see them after all. And then I feel I should stay reclusive & not try to attempt a normality of life at all. Most attempts to access activities that interest me are always thwarted. Or I'm signed up for some " oldies" activity as there's gov funding for that. I feel conspired against. I eek out a survival, not a life. I'm trying to be responsible for my son, but I'm only seen as a mum or a carer, not a person to have any rights as themselves. My son has gotten cruises, dances, parties, coastal holidays. No one tries to support him into anything like a supported workshop, volunteer work. He expects life to be one big party on a plate. They have set him up with an irrational expectation. I have an older son, but I'm disconnected from him & he lives in another state.

How did I end up here?

replies: 5

Hey everyone, I’ve made a real mess of things over the last few years and I feel like I’m sinking further into the mess every day. I came out of covid working in a job I absolutely loved and could see myself doing for the next 10 years. I’d nailed WFH life and excelled during the lockdowns and came out the other side with a promotion and thought I was kicking goals. Until a new manager was added to the company directly above me, and started taking away the decision making and position of leadership I’d worked so hard to get to. Unfortunately, I handled the whole thing wrong and turned on him, refusing to share information, keeping things to myself and generally made the working relationship difficult at first, and eventually untenable. The more I fought against it, the worse I felt about myself. I lost my confidence, my work quality started to decline and instead of taking responsibility for it, I blamed him and other factors. My solution was to find a new job and run away, but I took a job I knew I wasn’t suited to, and only a few days after I started there I knew I’d made a big mistake. The culture didn’t suit me at all, the job I was told about and actually asked to do we’re totally different, and after 9 months of hating every day, I was let go. Which was actually a relief. But…I’m now working contract roles, taking casual hours and have lost all confidence in myself. My brain is spinning, in fact it never stops, but I can’t turn all the thoughts and ideas into anything of substance on paper. I know my current contract role will end soon because I’m not delivering what I know I’m capable of, and they’ll let me go thinking I can’t be successful in this role, although I know I could smash it in the right head space. I just feel so beaten down, like I can’t succeed anymore. I can’t look anyone in the eye and know I’m not even close to what I can and should be doing. I’ve lost all confidence in myself and doubt every thought I have. It’s hard to be productive when you spend the day replaying every conversation or interaction over and over in your head, worry about what the other person thought of me. This feeling just makes me so miserable, that I can’t find the motivation to try and drag myself forward, so it’s a cycle of failure I seem certain to keep repeating. How can I get myself back on track and show people I’m actually a dependable and hard working employee, when I can’t even get myself to focus or complete the most basic tasks?

Psychosis

replies: 5

I ended up going through drug induced psychosis about 4 years ago and it has forever changed my life...i'm wondering if any of you have gone through psychosis and how you have got through it? I still struggle with knowing what was real and what was not real with my experience...i never thought i'd go through anything like that, but i did, i just want to go back to the person i was before i went through that roller coaster ride....can anyone else relate and have any advice on how to let all the thoughts and beliefs go? I remember everything in detail so vividly and i wish i could just move on from it, but me and my overthinking brain wants to make sense of what i went through and can't let it go....i will leave it here and hope to hear from anyone on this matter...thanks for taking the time to read this

Lost and fearful

replies: 1

Hello there, I thought id never need this kind of help but it seems i was wrong.I'm a male 55 years old and although i have never had a good life it until the last couple of years been ok i guess.Keeping it simple for now about 2 years ago i tore my achilies tendon in leg and ever since then things have not gone right.I am a diabetic type 2 so my injuries became complicated and long drawn out still ongoing.Because of these Ive virtually had to stop full time work just using last of leave now after 33 years in same job.With no real income right now i applied to centerlink but was told i earned to much due to these payments. This also meant i did not get aa concession card to help out. Medical visits 4 or so times a week to various sections does not help either. not to mention the costs of meds etc.I did finally get a superannuation insurance claim but its tiny and don't know how long it will keep up .I have no family,no friends anywhere near to help so im doing this alone. Ive seen my gp he has sent me to see a mental health professional end of this week but its a lot of money per session.My head is going round and round all the time asleep or awake. Lost, confused and fearful of the future with this. Thank anyone who reads this.

What is up with me ?

replies: 3

Hi,Ive never done this before. I don't even know where to start. Let's start with my bad self esteem lol, which i guess is kinda linked to my other problem of anxiety. Here is how i feel: I struggle socially and because of this i guess i constantly compare myself to others, and how good socially they are. I shouldn't i know. But its difficult. I see friends hang out, i see groups of kids all laughing and having fun and think how easy that must be. I can't help but feel why am i so like this? Why do i feel drained when i do socialize? I feel out of place. I also feel like i have to fit into a mold so people will just think that im a good person. I am always worried about what people think of me. I guess i can be described as a people pleaser, and i know i shouldn't be. But my mind is overwhelmed with all these thoughts and feelings, like "what if they like me or hate me. What if they don't want to hang out with me? Oh yea they have their own group they all love hanging out they wouldn't like me. Im a boring person i guess." I just feel out of place. Not only do i have these feelings, but hanging out with others is difficult. I need a few days to process the thought of hanging out with others. I HATE THIS. I wish i could just be that person who is confident and doesn't care about what others think, who finds it easy to socialize, who finds it easy to make friends with every body. I hate this about myself - how I am. As a result, my self esteem is low and when i think about these things i don't feel joy. I just feel out of place in this world. Like i want coping strategies and i want support. I don't exactly know what to do. My parents are always so supportive and loving but idk i just feel like I need more than this. I want to feel different - i want to be joyful with others. I want to feel comfortable with others and myself. I want to not care what others think. But i want to be that person who is full of confidence and can talk to others without feeling like they don't want me or they are just being nice. I want an open personality! Anyway, idk.

Where to begin

replies: 1

Hi, as per the title where to begin.., I have finally come to terms that I need help to like myself again, I’m tired of the constant daily battles and the wearing of a mask pretending yep I’m all good. In reality I’m far from good and the daily battle of fighting to stay in the light is slowly being conceded. Im looking for help but all I come up with is yes we can help but in 4 or 6 weeks, possibly this is selfish but I don’t want to wait as that gives me time to make excuses and put it off. Not even sure if this will get any responses but I have to try. I’m in south east Melbourne, work in the city, any recommendations or assistance of which direction or advise would be appreciated more than uou will ever know - rob

Feeling lost

replies: 2

Hi I am currently 43 and feeling very lost and unhappy all the time.I did not have the best upbringing and have strived to make myself a better person. I was in juvenile detention at 14 years of age after living on the streets. I found my real mother passed away and unfortunately due to father not dealing well my sisters and I were placed in homes My father remarried and my relationship with my stepmother was never right sometimes traumatic for me.I left the situation I was in and begun a new life rebuilding relationship with my father. Since the death of my father his last words were to promise him to look after my stepmother which I have done to my best ability but have also forgotten about my partner, son and my own happiness. I suffer quite bad anxiety and depression and feel I don't fit in anywhere. My son had just turned 18 my partner of 20 years is leaving me.I guess I'm just curious if it's me,my problem or is there something I can do.Many thanks in advance

Traumatised from work

replies: 1

Hi guys, I’m 27 years old and been working in hospitality industry for 7 years now. I have had some terrible experiences with work, co workers and employers.I used to be very self motivated, hard working and dedicated with work.I burnt myself out because I was a people pleaser and tried to help everybody when I could, I realised I had to change and set boundaries if I want to be healthy with my life outside of work. I started to speak up and said no, but people werent happy with the change I made.I used to get bullied, personally attacked and told i was not good enough. Gaslight and manipulation were part of my day at work. I was so traumatised, I was in my early 20s and was dealing with social phobia (social anxiety), I was worried whether my co-worker and the regular customers would like me or not, what they would think about me, and whether they would judge me or not. I always tried to control what they think, I worried so much that I lost myself in my head, I felt dizzy and felt sick in my stomach. I lost my job because of my anxiety, my overthinking pattern. It affected me until today. I still struggle with getting back to work, because I’m always scared about something bad would happen, people wouldnt like the way I work. But lately, I’ve been trying to find a new job that suits me and I try to speak my mind if something doesnt align with me, is that bad? Trying to speak up and set boundary from the beginning, rather than being a yes-man and burning myself out in the end. I still think we are still in work culture where we always have to say yes to be able accepted in a company. We can’t speak our mind and let people see our perspective. I’m still so traumatised, Im scared that I wont be able to find a job that I can stay for a long period of time. What am i gonna do if i dont work? Im really scared right now i cant even eat even though im hungry, my head is spinning because of stress. What should I do???

Hi, I just joined

replies: 2

Hi i'm kind of new to this but has anyone else just been sad for no apparent reason? like you cry sometimes and you don't exactly know why? and random words and actions from other people hurt you more than it should?

In over my head

replies: 3

I'm exhausted. Mentally and emotionally. Work is really getting to me. We're short staffed so I've stepped up, but my stress and anxiety had skyrocketed. I am trying to do a good job but the workload is overwhelming and I'm just feeling like I'm not cut out for the higher duties I've taken on. My boss doesn't help. Just tries to coach, doesn't offer help or solutions when I ask for them. It actually makes me feel even more inadequate. I used to like my work. Now I hate it. I'm always worried about it, and it's taking away from my family life. I'm working ridiculous hours because there is so much work. I am drowning but there's no way out.

Meet your community champions! replies: 10

HELP..Am I posting in the right section? replies: 10

Burnt out replies: 2

How did I end up here? replies: 5

Psychosis replies: 5

Lost and fearful replies: 1

What is up with me ? replies: 3

Where to begin replies: 1

Feeling lost replies: 2

Traumatised from work replies: 1

Hi, I just joined replies: 2

In over my head replies: 3